My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

AIBU to think that if DH has a day off in the week while I am at work he should help around the house?

12 replies

mummyofexcitedprincesses · 25/05/2010 17:00

We both work full time, I work longer hours at the moment. DH gets a lot more time off than me, including weekdays when the kids are at school.

I never get a day off work that doesn't fall on a weekend or school holiday, so no child-free time. Is it too much to ask him to do a few bits around the house instead of swanning off to the bloody gym (where I don't get time to go)?

We both do day-to-day stuff, but he never does more than that, so I find the house is getting messier and messier as I can't keep on top of it. I know I'm ranting but I am just so CROSS!

Grrrrrr. Rant over, for now....

OP posts:
Report
HecateQueenOfWitches · 25/05/2010 17:03

No it's not. What did he say when you told him how you felt and that since you both work outside the home full time, the household stuff should be split more evenly.

Also does he know what it is you would like him to do?

Report
southeastastra · 25/05/2010 17:06

do you think he needs it spelt out? men don't automatically think to clean up

Report
kittywise · 25/05/2010 17:07

It's his DAY OFF, good grief, you sound like a harridan.

Report
stealthsquiggle · 25/05/2010 17:07

Write a (joint) list of jobs other than day-to-day stuff which is getting done. Talk about what from that list he can get done on his day off and what you can get done on yours (pointing out that his day is child-free and yours isn't).

Good Luck. YANBU.

Report
FabIsGoingToGetFit · 25/05/2010 17:08

YABU to think he should help.

He should do it because it needs doing. NOT TO HELP YOU.

Report
southeastastra · 25/05/2010 17:19

why does she sound like a harridan? he gets more time off too so should help more.

Report
mummyofexcitedprincesses · 25/05/2010 17:19

Kitty, it is his day off and I appreciate that, I don't expect him to spend the whole day on housework, but n.or do I expect to have to do it all when I get in from work to a messy house in need of a good clean.

PS- are you my husband in disguise?

OP posts:
Report
Nats83 · 25/05/2010 17:20

mummyofexcited princess, of course he should help out! It shouldn't just be you that has to do everything, that is not fair. Things should be equal but they never are with men! That's obviously a generalization, I am a little annoyed with my boyfriend at the moment!

You should speak to him and explain how you feel, if he doesn't listen then I would stop doing things for him for awhile until he takes you seriously. Let him do his own washing! etc

Report
Lulumaam · 25/05/2010 17:22

there is no reason he can't go to the gym & do stuff round the house. gym should be what, an hour and half - 2 hours max? which leaves plenty of time for some house stuff too...

if i work an evening and Dh is at home, he clears up from supper , bathes children, puts them to bed and supervises homework if necessary..

because they are his children and it's his house too.

if you can afford to buy in help, do it !

Report
kittywise · 25/05/2010 17:27

I second that, buy in some help!

Report
rewardgirl · 25/05/2010 17:30

I agree with Lulumaam. If you can afford to buy in help, I would. Life's too short and it's spreading the wealth ;)
Definitely NOT bu - but some of these posters are right - men don't always see things that need doing as much as we do, so may have simply not realised. He needs to pull his finger out more by the sounds of things (IMHO), but drawing a list up sounds like a good start.

Report
TheBoyWithaSORNedMX5 · 25/05/2010 17:31

What Fab says - he should do it because it needs doing. NOT TO HELP YOU. It is not YOUR job to keep house - it is the job of anyone physically able to. I mean that lives at yours mind. I'm not cleaning up after you.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.