To want to earn money for this?

[fernie3]

Quite a long story but my husband recently became self employed, the main reason he left his old job was his mental health he had been suffering from depression and we decided that he was not able to continue the way he was. We had expected him to have a significant drop in his income (we didnt feel we had a choice at that point) and planned for this. However so far that hasnt been the case and I have been very proud of how well he has done and his state of mind has improved a huge amount just in the last couple of months.

However, since he has been home I have been having to organize everything in terms of all the admin and money side of things as well as basicaly writing him a to do list for each project as his depression is better but not to the point where is can take on a large task it needs to be small manageable things that he can see the end of. I have also handled alot of communication with clients as wlel as actually finding them in the first place. It means that i am sitting with him either on my computer or organizing him all day and often all evening as well we also have three children under 6 that I do the majority of the care for.

At the moment my husband is registered as self employed I am not so essentially all of this is done free. I know that in the grand scheme of things is doesnt really make a difference as the same amount of money would come in more or less whatever BUT I would like for some of that to be really mine and for me to have a proper job in this!

We are trying to afford to put my younger two in nursery a little bit because things are getting out of hand with the amount of time I have to spend doing this now.

I know that my husband would not mind either way but certain members of my family think that I am being unreasonable as they say it would make us worse off if we did this and that it is still all his work even if I help him.

Is it unreasonable to want to be recognized like this for no real reason other than feeling stuck in the middle of being a SAHM and not?

[itsmeitsmeolord]

YANBU.

What are the tax implications of you being paid though? Would it leave you worse off?
Would it be easier if you work for the company officially as then you could devote more time and bring in enough work to cover your costs?

What does your husband think about it? Other peoples opinions aren't worth a rub if he thinks it's ok.

[msrisotto]

It sounds like you're the one running the business and he's the employee.

[sheas]

YANBU, get a good accountant, they will be able to advise you what the thresholds etc are. At the end of the day you should be rewarded and recognised for your efforts and if your family don't agree...don't tell them, it's none of their business.

[Thistledew]

What you are feeling with regards to your contribution being recognised is completely understandable. It seems to be the same old chestnut of "womens' work" not being valued or appreciated.

I hope that you and your husband have equal access to the household finances at the very least?

It is probably worth while for both of you to seek advice on whether the current set up is the best arangement financially, and this may depend on what the business is earning. If you claimed a salary also, you would have to pay tax on it, but it could reduce your tax liabilty over all if your husband takes a lower salary. You would have two lots rather than one lot of minimum allowance for example. It also may work out better if one of you "employs" the other.

Don't forget also that your pension will be affected if you are not paying NI contributions, which could have a long term impact upon you.

[fernie3]

at the moment we are earning roughly the same as he was at his old job. So if we say split it then we would both be getting a fairly low amount each month (say around £1100 per month). The money actually all goes into a joint account anyway so I have equal access to the money as it stands now - it more of a personal thing to want to be recognized for it I think!. I have been a sahm for 6 years and before that was in Uni with a part time job so have never really had my own earnings it would be nice to have that now . I will have to try and get advice on this I think.

[EricNorthmansmistress]

Well...if it were split you would both get a personal allowance of 6.5k so you would jointly be better off.

You could possibly also qualify for WTC to help with nursery costs if you were both working.

But what difference would it make having 'your own earnings'? Surely it's all one pot? Although I understand what you mean about being recognised for your work. Why don't you register as partners in the business?

[MoominmammasHandbag]

Fernie, myself and DH found ourselves in this position when he became self employed. He paid me a small wage which kept him out of the 40% tax bracket and made us better off overall.
As the business has become more successful we have found it advantageous to set up as a limited company and pay part of our income as dividends. I would suggest asking around about a good accountant (and remember the cheapest isn't always the best) you can really save a lot of money if you plan your tax matters wisely.

[ihearthuckabees]

fernie - good luck finding out more. An accountant will be able to easily help you, although you may need to be careful re your DH paying you - I think the 'taxman' looks out for this, as some people use it to scam their taxes. But as I say, an accountant can set it up properly and so it shouldn't be a problem. (My DH pays me a little for doing his admin - he is a self-employed sole trader).

I understand what you're saying re earning your own money. It is important to feel valued.

[gingerkirsty]

What mint said re tax - definitely.

[BIGMomma37]

YANBU, get him to pay you 6475 PA to minimise tax and NI liability. You'll both end up with more money that way.