to not fund ds further education

[frazzled74]

we have a moderate income which allows us to pay mortgage etc and have 1 holiday per year plus a few day trips etc, but no savings. ds 17 will be going to uni next year. we also have a 7 and 4 year old.
am i being unreasonable to expect ds to take student loan to cover tuition and accomodation costs etc.Some of my friends are talking about taking on second jobs and remortgaging to help finance uni. I think this would be detrimental to rest of family (not enough equity anywayto remortgage)
I was hoping that ds would find part time /holiday work to minimise his borrowing and that i woud be on hand with food parcels, train fares etc. I know that its hard that students end up with masses of debt but is it that awful?

[OTTMummA]

no, most people i know had little help from parents except things like food parcles - my nan used to send me a tesco voucher card with money on it to help out.
if you can send him a little each month etc then that would be great.
But he needs to learn now that he has to rely on himself, he is becoming an adult.

[morningpaper]

Masses of debt is awful yes

Having said that, I wouldn't help my children either - they need to learn the value of money.

Is it really worth him going to university? Is he expected to have a good degree in a worthwhile subject? If he is going to end up with 30k debt and a third in advertising then I wouldn't encourage it TBH

I think you need to make sure he has a good understanding of money, understands that credit cards are insane, knows how to use spreadsheets, can work in the holidays, finds a houseshare instead of expensive halls, etc.

[annh]

What is your ds going to study? I know this is a different kind of topic but having just gone through over 400 applications for one job to shortlist, I realised that I first of all looked at the work experience and only way later took into account the degree course and education. This was for a fairly junior position but in an industry which is thought of as "sexy" to be in (think fashion or advertising, but not either of those). Probably about 370+ of the applicants had degrees in something-or-other (the something-or-other signifies that in many cases I didn't even get around to looking at what it was or couldn't figure out what the person had actually studied) and most were from universities I was unfamiliar with and in subjects like Theatre, Film and Advertising - all as one degree, not separate, I kid you not! It was obvious that most applicants had failed to get a job in anything related to their degree, took on what was probably supposed to be a temporary job in insurance or retail and 5 years down the line are still trying to break into their original field. Presumably they also have the student loans to prove it!

I spoke to dh about it and said that unless something seriously changed before our ds's go to university, if they decide to study something just for the sake of it or because all their friends are going to uni, I will be seriously discouraging it unless they get a place at a respected university and study something which has a reasonable chance of leading to a related position and, most importantly, one which they could not have obtained without a university degree.

[waitingforbedtime]

My parents paid my tuition fees and odd things like food parcels, train etc and I worked part time. It was fine. Only debt I have is student loans which ok is 16k but I would NEVER have expected my parents to fork out that amount anyways. Oh and my gran paid for my books at a certain chain.

Like others have said is he going to really benefit from studying. Imo too many people go to Uni now because its the 'done thing'.

Depending on what Uni he goes to alot of students may be self funding - at mine I was in the minority but tbh I didnt grudge that I was actually quite proud.

YANBU.

[waitingforbedtime]

PS If he is doign a very intensive course like medicine I can see how it would be very hard to work part time on top of that.

[Pootles2010]

I think you probably need to just work out the amounts - would he be able to get a student loan to cover everything? If so, great.

When i was there (7 years ago) my loan would have just covered accomodation and fees, nothing else (food bils etc). I did have a part time job in term time, and full time in holiday, no way would it have been enough. And things have changed hugely since then.

Would studying at home be a possibility? But i think (unless he's maybe doing medicine or something really intensive) part time jobs at uni are a must - if only for the reason it looks better when you come to get a job afterwards.

[morningpaper]

The jobs I got was BECAUSE of the part-time work I did while studying

As Ann says, if he is getting a joint honours in Colouring In and Collecting Stickers from Swindon then it really isn't worth it

[morningpaper]

"The jobs I got was" clearly not because of my excellent grammar

[TrillianAstra]

He should get the loan, work in the holidays, work part-time during term if not too demanding a course.

If you let him live at your house rent-free during holidays, and if you can continue to give him pocket money as currently (or even give him the money that you save by him not living there) that would be helpful. His being at university should not be more expensive for you thn his being at home and entirely dependent.

Taking on extra jobs or remortgaging is ridiculous and unnecessary. Yes, he will be in debt, but it is debt that he will never be pressured to repay (comes off as a % of earnings when earning over a threshold) and that should never accrue real interest (linked to rate of inflation).

[barefootinthepark]

yanbu

[ShinyAndNew]

My Aunt has a degree in Art and is much sought after and head hunted in her field (marketing). She landed her first job (at Bisto) because she was working in their factory during her degree.

OTOH my sister has a degree in Child Studies and was unable to work during her degree because of pregnancy and her children. She is unemployed and can only find bank work.

It's better to work through uni imo, unless you are going into a specific field like medicine or law, degrees are pretty useless with no experience.

[TrillianAstra]

Can we please pick ONE thread?

[Jaggers]

It depends he will be assesed on your income, so does your income prevent him from being given enough student funding to support himself? if he gets his full student loan and his tuition fee loan then YANBU.

But if he doesn't get enough funding due to your income then YABU.

As a muture student I know that some of my class mates have gotten quite poor grades due to having to spend far to much time working in their part time jobs, to make ends meat. Work out how much he will need a month see if his loans cover this and how many hours he will need to work on min wage.

Also check to find out if he is able to get a maintainance (SP) grant

[MPuppykin]

You are not being unreasonable. He can work and take a student loan. i did it, plenty of people do it.

And like many people here, I got my jobs because i had a history of being employed in crappy jobs but with good staying power.

On the other hand, my best friend NEVER worked, through school or university. Her parents said she needed to concentrate on her studies. She found it incredibly hard to get into a job in her field (architecture) and then kept getting sacked because it was like she did not KNOW how to work.... she never understood the concept of getting to work on time for instance. I just think it is valuable for young people to learn the value of money, learn the value of hard work and to put the effort in.