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AIBU?

daughters/granddaughters

33 replies

U2here · 24/02/2010 09:51

At the dinner table my granddaughter dropped meat, daughter picked it up and put it back on 4and halfyr old's plate.I was shocked and I guess it showed tho I didn't say anything. Daughter said they often eat things that they dropped, even outside! She proudly said that she ate gum she found on the pavement when she played out as a child 'and it did her no harm'. They have a garden that is 'used' by her cat and the three who live next door. I did not argue or give any opinion,g'daughter was at the table and a bit emotionally upset as she is in her first term at school. I have been thinking about this all night and wounder if I should tackle her in private, at all or just send her the definition of hygiene and toxocariasis. Why am I so worried when clearly daughter doesn't care.

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ilovesprouts · 24/02/2010 09:55

have you heard of the 2 second rule ,yuk at eating gum off thr floor tho

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Coldhands · 24/02/2010 09:58

Hmmm. Sounds a bit gross to me. If DS drops something on our living room floor (where we eat our meals) and I have just hovered then I don't really mind him eating it. If I haven't hovered, I will put it in the bin, and I would never do it at someone elses house as you don't know the state of the floor. I definately wouldn't do it where there were any animals regardless of when they had cleaned.

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ChristianaTheSeventh · 24/02/2010 10:01

Message withdrawn

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cory · 24/02/2010 10:08

I think you are getting several different things mixed up here.

Surely picking a piece of meat off your dining room floor (assuming that your house is reasonably hygienic) has nothing to do with your dd's admittedly disgusting habit of eating gum off pavement, nor has it anything to do with cats in her garden (unless the same cats are also using your dining room as a cat tray)?

Your dd no doubt felt criticised by your reaction and pitched her response strong in defiance. It is extremely unlikely that she is actually encouraging her dd to eat gum off the pavement.

I would absolutely lay off your dd. She is bringing up her child and that is her prerogative. Highly unlikely that she has not heard the basic rules of hygiene. But she may also have heard that there is present concern about too much hygiene.

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Longtalljosie · 24/02/2010 10:20

You are worrying too much.

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babyOcho · 24/02/2010 10:24

We always pick up food from the floor and eat it - our own food. Wouldn't pick up some random food from the floor.

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U2here · 24/02/2010 10:24

Sorry, I should have said that we were at her house not mine.

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leenasmom · 24/02/2010 10:25

I did not let my dc eat anything when they dropped it on the floor...

But I soon discovered that this was becoming a ploy to get out off finishing there dinner or get out off eating something. So now I tell them that my floor is clean and the two second rule applies...
saying that they are now 8 and 7 so rarely miss there mouth --wish same could be said about Dh

May be this is something that your dd is trying to aviod I am sure that she would not encourage her child to eat off pavements as you didnt with her. bless my nephew would sit on the garden path and wait for ants to come out the gap to catch them and eat them was 2 at the time and soon grew out of it.

.

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cory · 24/02/2010 10:41

Well even so, she is unlikely to catch anything very nasty from her dining room floor. Just because your dd then felt riled and told a couple of unsavoury anecdotes, doesn't make the meat-eating any more dangerous.

Don't let it get in the way of your relationship. My Mum and my MIL both had problems with their MILs, who obsessed about hygiene and the dangers to babies of putting things in their mouths. Mum's and Grandma's relationship never recovered: they still distrusted each other until she died nearly 20 years later. My MIL (a very friendly person) had to move out to get away from her MIL as she felt her constant fussing and worrying was turning her (my MILs) son into a very anxious little boy.

Not suggesting you are in this super anxious category, but this seems a good time to avoid the slippery slope.

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Lucyellensmumma · 24/02/2010 11:01

2 second rule! the amount of bacteria a bit of food would pick up being dropped on the floor is minimal - if this bit of food was put back in the fridge or on the side and eaten later, it might be a danger - but so long as it hasn't fallen in a turd its fine, don't worry - i have to say, i rather enjoy the look of horror on my mums face when DD drops something hands it to me and i wipe it and give it back to her.

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Lucyellensmumma · 24/02/2010 11:03

Seriously though, you sound like a caring grandparent - but dont please please dont "have a word" or send her information - she will resent you for it.

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MrsWobbleTheWaitress · 24/02/2010 11:07

Leave your poor daughter alone! It is very important that children ingest bacteria otherwise their immune systems won't develop to be strong enough to cope with big illnesses. My children eat food that's been on the floor and they're pretty much the healthiest children I know. Eating food that's fallen in mud, though, is another matter, and gum off the pavement is just gross!

But more to the point, your grandchildren are not your children, they are your daughter's children, to be brought up as she sees fit!

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claw3 · 24/02/2010 11:08

Had to laugh at this thread, my ds has an extremely limited diet and a food phobia, but he will happily eat a malteser that has rolled underneath the settee, fluff an all!

Lighten up a bit.

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Chulita · 24/02/2010 11:13

2 second rule? My mum always said it was 10...seriously, she must really have been confident of our stomach strength!
I pick food up for DD if she drops it depending on how clean the floor is. If she has a biscuit and wanders about with it she ends up wiping it on stuff and eating it anyway. Bearing in mind last week she picked her nose and put it in another toddlers mouth I don't think I'm going to win trying to stop germs getting around!

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OTTMummA · 24/02/2010 11:13

there is no need to 'send her information about hygine' or have a word!
your dd has managed to keep HER DD alive and well i take it for over 4 yrs, so clearly she has all the info on hygine she needs!

im pretty sure she doesn't let her DD drop a sweetie on a cat turd in the garden then shoves it in her mouth, you don't really think that do you?! lol

kids do lots of gross stuff, i remember eating worms, and mud pie, licking snails etc, so really just chill out and let the little things go.

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Lucyellensmumma · 24/02/2010 11:20

oh, dont be flaming the OP - shes just a caring grandma who need to get with the program re germs! I am personally dreading my DD getting pregnant because im such a bloody control freak and i know im going to have to just suck up her crazy arse ideas when she has a baby. It must be really difficult actually.

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JemL · 24/02/2010 12:11

It's not 2 or 10 - it's the 7 second rule

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Geocentric · 24/02/2010 12:18

Hehehe I always thought it was 5 seconds.... I guess as long as under a minute...

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nickelbabe · 24/02/2010 12:19

as long as your floor is relatively clean, then it's not a problem.

the picking up other people's food or gum from the pavement is disgusting.

the germs are godo for the immune system, but obviously we don't want to overdo it.

i wouldn't pick up and eat food from a floor that pets had been walking on (as they go outside and don't take their shoes off when they come back in) and the floor around our cooker is absolutely filthy (we can't reach inbetween it and it needs pulling out to clean properly) so i don't pick up that food either.

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WhoIsAsking · 24/02/2010 12:20

Please don't send her a description of hygiene!

She ate gum of the floor when she was a child? presumably you were in charge of her then?!

Chill a bit, be careful because you could well damage your relationship with your DD and invevitably your DGD

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minkulus · 24/02/2010 12:29

sorry but LOL at Chulita's DD ! What did the other child do?!!

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diddl · 24/02/2010 12:34

OP-is this your own daughter?

If so,how can you not know that she picked things up and ate them?

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sarah293 · 24/02/2010 12:52

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shatteredmumsrus · 24/02/2010 12:54

what a crazy thread - sureley there are worse things!!!

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ScreaminEagle · 24/02/2010 14:03

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