to think that primary schools should remember that some parents do ^actually^ work.....

[knickerelasticjones]

Ok so I probably am being unreasonable, but please let me rant anyway.....

DD1 starts school in August and we got a little leaflet from the school with all the dates showing how they manage the transition to P1. Smashing

.... except...

There are four events scheduled April / May / June and they are ALL on a Monday during school hours. Two of the events are with the children - so clearly they have to be in school hours, fair enough. But there are also two parent only meetings - both scheduled for a Monday afternoon!!

Don't these people realise that some of us work! I can't just say to my boss - "oh sorry, I'll have to take every second Monday off in the spring". I don't work in the kind of job where you can just pop away for a few hours - you either do the whole shift, or you take the whole day off.

And why does everything have to be on a Monday? I work part time - Monday and Tuesday, so this is a real bugbear of mine. I can't change my days (I've asked). I can't be the only parent of young children who works part time, so didn't the school think it might be an idea to maybe mix the days up a bit?

I know I'm ranting and I'll have to get used to it when DD goes to school. But I just want to do the best for her when she starts school and I genuinely don't know how DH and I are going to cover all the time off we are supposed to take!

So how unreasonable am I really?

[nickytwotimes]

Well, parents work all hours, not just 9-5 Monday-Friday. Lots of people work evenings and wouldn't be able to attend then either. ANd if they schedule stuff at the weekend then people would moan about that school taking over family time.

I do get you, but what can they really do?

[MrsMattie]

Agree.

I miss almost everything my son's school organises because I work - and unfortunately 'time off to go to the PTA meeting' isn't in my contract! I am about to go back to study full time, too, and will have the same problem. Do I go to the parenting group at 10am on a Thursday and miss a lecture? Will my lecturers rearrange a seminar to accommodate a school open morning?

Schools these days harp on about wanting to be at the heart of their communities, but very few accomodate working parents.

[MrsMattie]

To be honest, I don't know what they can do. Not be sniffy about parents missing stuff, I guess. Nopt expect parents tomake a big commitment to the school when they already have huge work commitments.

It was better in my day, when my mum dropped us off at school and didn't have a clue what we did (and probably didn't care)

[Hulababy]

They should hold the meetings on different days/times each time ideally, and at least one of the parent only meetings in an evening.

[nickytwotimes]

...or you cuold just do what I do with Ds's pre-school stuff and not bother.

Honestly, I can't be arsed with the whole PTA et al rubbish.

[GypsyMoth]

cant your dh do some of them?

[knickerelasticjones]

Thank you - I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who feels peeved by this. And I know the school is really a bit stuck over what to do - I just felt they could perhaps have scheduled the events at different times on different days rather than always go for a Monday afternoon.

The problem with all the transition meetings is we really HAVE to go. We can't just leave DD out in the cold not having seen round the school/ us not having met her teachers until we turn up in August.

I just get very riled by the whole thing - particularly as my job is not 9-5 - I work shifts and can be working any time between 4.30am and midnight. I also work every bank holiday, plus Easter, plus Christmas too if necessary.... but it's probably me that needs a career change rather than the school that should change!

[violetqueen]

Well,what could they do ?
How about taking a poll ,asking the parent body to vote on preferred times and then going with the majority ?

[SE13Mummy]

knickerelasticjones, how about contacting the school and asking if there are plans to repeat these sessions on another day? For whatever reason the Monday has been chosen but if enough new parents request an additional session then I'm sure they'd try to offer one.

Very few people have jobs that are completely tailored/flexible enough to fit in with random school events. My husband and I are teachers and we can?t very well say, ?sorry, I can?t teach Y11 for period 6 today as I have to go to a family learning session... I?ll make up the time at home?. What we can and do do is to let the school know that we?d love to come along but that we are working and ask if there?s any chance of an additional session being put on. If we, as working parents, don?t give the schools a chance to accommodate our needs by letting them know what they are then we can?t really complain that their psychic powers arent? working!

[SE13Mummy]

I?ve just seen your next post; my DD?s school didn?t offer any transition for children that weren?t coming from their own nursery so I contacted the school and requested/demanded that my child be given an opportunity to look round the school, meet her teachers etc. In the end it was arranged to be convenient to us which was perfect! You could ask the school if your DD could visit on a different occasion ? as a teacher I know that if it was a choice between a child being able to visit on a different day or else not at all I?d go with the first option every single time.

[joanne34]

Welcome to Life....

You say the events are with the children.. ie 4 year olds.... what time are they supposed to go ?

I would at least go to a couple, its for your child, and this is just the start.... working with new starters is hard ! Wait for all the illnesses

The first year, my holiday was about 10 days taken up with sick time off with DC1...

[posieparker]

At my dcs old school they catered far too much for working parents and not at all for people without a partner to babysit, all events were at the weekend or evening and so the attendance to fund raisers was dreadful. People who work all week want to spend their weekends with their dcs not at a poorly organised fete!

Seems as if schools need to double up.

[knickerelasticjones]

SE13Mummy you are very wise....

I think I might contact the school about one of the parent events and ask how important is it that we go, and see if it is possible that it could be rearranged. And if we just can't go I'll certainly phone to apologise - and show that we aren't just snubbing them! We can prioritise taking time off for the stuff that DD is invited to.

And if I'm brave enough I might even suggest that they try not to do everything on a Monday next time....

[coppertop]

Why do they need to have two meetings for the parents? Surely there's not all that much that they will need to talk to you about?

Any chance of skipping the parent-only ones and asking if they can just send the info to you instead?

[knickerelasticjones]

Yeah, Joanne34 I'm just realising that the school years are real life, and we've been sort of living in a bit of a pamered paradise with kids at nursery (they're open 8-6! They open on bank holidays! They never organise events during the day!)

I think DH and I are generally feeling a bit grumpy / apprehensive about DD starting school and how we will cover all the holidays / in service days etc. We've worked out that even if both DH and I took all our holiday separately we still wouldn't have enough time off to cover all the school holidays. And unfortunately we don't have any willing relatives ready to take the kids when we can't. So I'm not entirely sure what we will do yet.....

[knickerelasticjones]

Should add that I know we won't the only parents in the whole "how do we cover the holidays?" thing, so I am moaning unjustly.

[SE13Mummy]

I'm not wise but I like to think I'm fairly sensible .

My preferred method is to contact the headteacher via e-mail (you can usually get the address from the school website, LA page or simply phone the school office and ask for it; it will often be [email protected]) and I?ve done this with my DD?s Headteacher to ask for days/times to be varied so that working parents/those with babies who need to sleep/those with toddlers who need to run around at playgroup/those who have other responsibilities can attend at least some of the events. Her response was rapid and helpful ? the next meeting was on a different day, just because I asked! If you don?t raise it as an issue they won?t know!