to think you really do not need to chase after your toddler spoon feeding them at a busy playgroup??

[girlsyearapart]

We go to a quite big busy playgroup every Friday. The same woman has been bringing her toddler (probably 18moish) and has brought her meal of mushed up whatever and yoghurt with her.
She feeds the child at the same time every week 11ish. Fair enough if child is used to eating at that time. However, she really does not look at all interested in the food. More interested in playing (surely the point of playgroup)

Week 1- child force spoon fed whilst playing with a toy car garage.

Week 2- at the top of a slide.

Week 3- at the bottom of the slide (even though other children waiting to slide down)

I have noticed lots of people doing this.

What I'm wondering is- if the child is genuinely hungry wouldn't they come over to you to be fed?

Why can't the parent take the child to a chair at side of room and feed them there?

These groups last 2 hours. Can't the child be fed before/after??

Don't know why it's bothering me so much but REALLY grated on me this week..

[Firawla]

as long as she is not making a mess getting that mashed food all over the toys and play area i would just ignore it, although not something i would do myself

[holdingittogether]

Seems daft to me. Like you say if child is so hungry at that time surely they would co operate with being fed. Spoon feeding mush to an 18mth old also seems a bit strange too. How is the child going to learn to feed himself if this is how meal times are?? Just all seems a bit crazy.

[holdingittogether]

maybe child has a blood sugar problem and has to eat at certain intervals?

[wilkos]

how odd.

but her perogative. if she wants to look like a loon then so be it

[TheApprentice]

does group not have a snack time? Ours does, kids all sit together at little tables and eat healthyish stuff! Mine have been able to join in with this since 1 year old.

[girlsyearapart]

The one today doesn't have a snack time they give free juice and biscuits though.

I don't have a problem with her feeding the child obviously you don't know why they need to be fed at that time but it's the chasing after/forcing to eat/blocking the way for other children thing that irritated me.

The other regular group we go to has snack time and lasts 2 hours and even there people do it.

Had to say something when one of the Mums was giving food to my dd2 who is allergic to pretty much everything.

That's a different story though!

[Stayingsunnygirl]

If it were me, I'd put the baby in the buggy whilst I fed them - it would be much quicker and less frustrating than chasing the child all over playgroup - plus it would be more considerate too.

However, I do agree that it seems a bit strange that an 18 month old is still eating mushed up food. It is a long time since mine were that age, but I'm sure they were tucking into ordinary food by then, even if they needed help feeding themselves (I honestly can't remember).

I believe that it's a good idea for children (and adults) to sit down properly to eat - it's a basic social skill, in my opinion. It sounds as if the mum hasn't got much control over the child, and is unwilling to try to impose any sort of discipline (by which I mean getting the child to sit down, and teaching the child that that's how we eat).

[Blondeshavemorefun]

seems daft to me chasing a child/much easier to feed in buggy

wonder why child doesnt eat lunch afterwards at 12.12/30 at home

[groundhogs]

I've just come back from living abroad, and I kid you not... that running around chasing the child, waiting til they are distracted before shoving spoonfuls down the LO's gullet thing, is exactly how they generally feed their kids out there...

I'd heard of it, but never truly believed it until I saw it with my own eyes, but it was so...

When we used to get our LOs to sit down and eat nicely, I swear to God, the local child-chasers mothers would stare at us.

[Rollmops]

None of your business, dear. Unless she directly hinders you and your DC, or causes a commotion of some sort, do mind your own business.
Toddler groups are horrid [shudder].

[hobnobsaremyfavourite]

I'm pretty sure my friend's baby was a "Gina Ford baby" and the regime/ routine suggested lunch at 11.30 to fit around nap time so she might be following a similar pattern?

[GoldenGreen]

groundhogs - standard Greek way of feeding children, I believe. My (Greek) mum really hates the "English" way of putting food on a toddler's highchair tray and letting them have a go themselves...

[NormaSknockers]

It's a little odd & not something I would do but it's each to their own I guess. Could be a GF baby as hobnobs suggested? My friend followed GF & literally never left the house

[MrsMerryHenry]

Maybe it's her first baby and she's still anxious/ getting used to managing feeding him/her? Oh, you lot are being so harsh...! I mean, to actually launch the accusation of her being a GF mum with no evidence of guilt?

[famishedass]

YANBU - all my italian friends do this - it gets on my bloody nerves - just leave the poor kids alone, they can eat at mealtimes.

[girlsyearapart]

TBH she may be the Grandma. Or an older Mum. She is Chinese looking (no offence intended by that btw) my sister was also at same group and said her friend's chinese SIL fed her dc 6 petit filou in one go ripping off the foil from the whole pack then proceeded to chase the child around to finish them.

So maybe it is a cultural thing?? [clueless emotcion]

I sometimes give mine sarnies in the car/pushchair but never run after them spoon feeding. Better things to do..

[whelk]

Let me tell you- this sort of thing is absolutely bloody terrifying when your dcs have food allergies - freakin' yoghurt everywhere!!!

I spend my life on tenterhooks at these places (dd1 allergy to egg, dd2 allergic to dairy, egg). Want to feed your dcs? Sit them down at a bloody table away from other kids

[whelk]

Girlsayearapart - sorry I know you from the allergy threads (not in a stalkery type way though) and you don't need telling how terrifying it is! Sorry.

[girlsyearapart]

Yes Keep your Goddamned Yoghurt AWAY from my child!!!!!

Hello whelk

[QueenOfFlamingEverything]

I have a family member married to a German woman - when they were over here last Christmas she was doing the same chasing/spoonfeeding thing with their 15mo.

Then I absent-mindedly let him snaffle some cucumber off my plate and they chased after him so they could cut the skin off

[hobnobsaremyfavourite]

Have I sinned by mentioning GF Apologies all round ;)

[Heated]

We have friends who used to chase dd1 around with spoonfuls of food until she was about 3, she had them just where she wanted them, indeed she still does. They find her precocious bossiness cute; suffice to say we don't. They too live abroad.

[girlsyearapart]

But going against the non native child chaser theme.. my friend does it too. She is English.

Wherever we are she chases child (2) around with yoghurt/bag of various snack items to 'get something into her'

Clearly not table manners then.

[alwayslookingforanswers]

I have just spent the last hour chasing DS3 round the room in order to get him to eat the rest of his dinner (he's 2 1/2) he starts eating it on his own and then gets bored and legs it . I don't force him to eat it - I offer the filled fork and he opens his mouth and eats it, when he's finally had enough he refuses (and I don't push it).

Having a child that won't sit and eat has come as a nasty shock after having two that seemed to learn quite easily that meals were to be eaten sat down and in one sitting not 3 or 4

[pigletmania]

Yes its the mediterranean way of doing things, my mum (Cyprus) did it with me, and now I did it with dd when she was under 2. Now i am more relaxed if she dosent want it i dont push and give it to her at a later date.