Order, Order.. Calling the AIBU mumsnet Jury to Court! Who's being unreasonable?

(87 Posts)
Nahui Wed 24-Jun-09 18:43:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nahui Wed 24-Jun-09 18:45:24

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 24-Jun-09 18:45:42

Hmm, I wouldn't want him making a regular thing of it. How essential was the milk, did the DH know what time his DW would be back, when does the shop shut?

Totally reasonable of the DH to get some milk if the shop is opposite the house. What was he gone 3 minutes?
Your friend is being unreasonable.

Nahui Wed 24-Jun-09 18:47:39

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Tambajam Wed 24-Jun-09 18:47:46

If it is literally right across the road and the monitor was completely functioning the whole time I think I would forgive.
I would feel uncomfortable because of the 'what ifs' that are possible but I think it's just about OK.

Bathsheba Wed 24-Jun-09 18:47:57

I would think he was being unreasonable.

It WASN'T an emergancy - she was due back any minute, and if it takes such a little time to get to the shop then he could have waited until she returned - he wasn't a single parent in crisis or even alone all night with no milk for a cup of tea.

To me the "same distance as the end of the garden" is a bit of a moot point - I'm expecting everyone to disagree with me and pick holes in the argument, but to my mind going out the front door and across the road is different - more potential for things to go wrong (being locked out, knocked down by a car...ehm, kidnapped by aliens...)...its a kind of intangible thing but to me it just seems different.

But in summary, she was due back any minute, he should have waited.

fruitstick Wed 24-Jun-09 18:48:03

I've had this discussion with DH. If he had been run over (highly unlikely I know) then noone would know kids were in the house. Actually baby monitor might have given it away.

No need to do it in my opinion

FabBakerGirlIsBack Wed 24-Jun-09 18:48:21

HIBU imo.

zookeeper Wed 24-Jun-09 18:48:23

If the shop was only across the road and both dcs were asleep then I don't see a problem. The risk that anyting would happen to them in that five minutes or indeed to their dad is pretty remote.

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 24-Jun-09 18:48:53

Well, he's agreed not to do it again and had a good reason, she should let him off this time.

Nancy66 Wed 24-Jun-09 18:49:08

wouldn't particularly bother me - he was a stone's throw away and with the baby monitor.

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 24-Jun-09 18:50:07

How much would DW have yelled if there was no milk for breakfast? grin

zeke Wed 24-Jun-09 18:50:32

Bit strange how he couldn't wait 5 mins for the milk.

I don't think he did anything wrong though tbh, as it was literally SO close.

MrsBadger Wed 24-Jun-09 18:50:37

they both were [gavel]

he was unreasonable to leave the house - he could have been mugged / hit by a car / witness to a robbery and forced to hang about by the police (see my previous famous neighbour-popped-out-leaving-pan-on-stove story)

she is being unreasonable not to let it drop a day later.

megapixels Wed 24-Jun-09 18:52:07

I wouldn't like it at all, but nothing happened and he's promised not to do it again, so she's BU for being mad with him STILL.

bronze Wed 24-Jun-09 18:53:07

I guess theyre more likely to realise about the kids if hes out on the street with the monitor than if he had a heart attack down the end of the garden

spicemonster Wed 24-Jun-09 18:54:45

I think that's fine. If the monitor still works, then there's no problem. And actually if it didn't, if he were literally gone for 2 mins, then I don't think it's a big issue. If he hadn't popped across the road, there quite possibly would have been no milk for breakfast which would have been a disaster! I go upstairs to see my neighbours sometimes - although I don't cross any roads I suppose. I'd like to think a grown man can generally cross a small road on his own though (unless of course they live at the side of the M1)

Onestonetogo Wed 24-Jun-09 19:05:46

She IBU.

Tortington Wed 24-Jun-09 19:07:15

dad - couldt he wait for the milk - its not urgent

branflake81 Wed 24-Jun-09 19:08:13

She is being unreasonable.

He would only have been gone for 5 minutes. It's not the end of the world.

hocuspontas Wed 24-Jun-09 19:11:50

I'm someone who 'pops out' and often forgets a key. So in that case HIB slightly U. And 20 hours is NOTHING grin

DisturbinglySexuallyInactive Wed 24-Jun-09 19:22:00

they are both being unreasonable grin

Snorbs Wed 24-Jun-09 19:37:50

So he did something that represented a tiny but real risk, and nothing bad actually happened. He's realised she wasn't happy about it so although he doesn't necessarily agree with her concerns, he's being sensitive to her feelings by agreeing not to do it again.

Yet, she's still banging on about it and bitching to her friends about how awful he is.

She is most definitely being unreasonable.

seeker Wed 24-Jun-09 19:41:56

I actually think he is absolutely in the right - and he would have been even if he hadn't taken the monitor. 5 minutes - what's going to happen in 5 minutes? Ask the controlled crying brigade about leaving a child crying for 5 minutes!

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