to think some people on netmums should be polite?

(88 Posts)
davidbowie Wed 17-Jun-09 12:17:17

I've only posted once so no doubt I'll be accused of being a troll out to cause trouble. I've been reading a lot of the threads and quite often people are outrageously rude to each other. Now if you don't agree what is wrong with saying in a polite way? Fairly often, very nasty name cally ensues. Do these people talk to each other like this in real life? Sorry but I do find it shocking. It's a shame when a post which could lead to a very good debate ends up with people swearing at each other.

do you mean mumsnet?

goodness, can hardly believe netmums is so vociferous.

We are much fluffier here wink


Ninkynork Wed 17-Jun-09 12:18:48

YABVVVU to call this "Netmums" shock

EachPeachPearMum Wed 17-Jun-09 12:19:15


davidbowie Wed 17-Jun-09 12:19:32

hahha sorry I do mean mumsnet!

MaDuggar Wed 17-Jun-09 12:19:41


pembslass Wed 17-Jun-09 12:19:54

Well...erm don't read it then innit! Never been to netmums but you really need to develop a thicker skin when dealing with the internet

EachPeachPearMum Wed 17-Jun-09 12:20:28

You missed off your ticker david!

18 years, 3 months 2 days since my last decent studio album

VinegarTits Wed 17-Jun-09 12:20:34

netmums is this way hun

Your in the wrong place

PMSL at netmums! You'll be calling us all huns next and wondering where our tickers are ....

Hang around a bit more and I think you'll get a better feel for the place. There's lots of 'telling it like it is' here, which can sometimes be pretty robust. But it's also a place full of humour, intelligence, forthright debate and a lot of compassion and support.


4 days, 5 hours, 3 minutes since last orgasm

pembslass Wed 17-Jun-09 12:21:23

who me? VT ?

davidbowie Wed 17-Jun-09 12:21:27

I'm not overly sensitive but it's a shame when a thread collapses into name calling

uberalice Wed 17-Jun-09 12:22:14

Assuming you mean Mumsnet.

Some people on Mumsnet are polite.


junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:22:32

It's nice to be nice. I'm nice until I get attacked and then I go for it. But I'm the same in real life. What pisses me off is people who are only nasty on the internet because there are no comebacks, they can "get away with it". Someone they are verbally lynching might be crying because of what's been said and they wouldn't know (not that I've ever cried over a pathetic internet bully)

davidbowie Wed 17-Jun-09 12:23:54

I dont mind people telling it like it is but do people really have to tell people to f off and call them bitches etc. How would people react if in the real world you disagreed with what they were saying and they said now f off you stupid f ing bitch.

I think you need to understand the broader context here, db. There has been a lot of unpleasant trolling going on recently, which might explain it.

In the main, if someone is called a bitch or told to fuck off then either they have deserved it, or it's a joke.

Desi will be along shortly to call us all cunts anyway!

VinegarTits Wed 17-Jun-09 12:25:39

Pemlass i meant the OP you muppet grin

unless you want to go over to the fluffy dark side??

davidbowie Wed 17-Jun-09 12:26:15

exactly junglist1 people can be upset and if someone tries for advice on mumsnet because perhaps they are too embarrassed face to face it must be awful to face a barrage of abuse. And of course I'm not in any way implying that all posters are impolite.

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:28:07

Sometimes it's not a joke. I've been called thick on here because I've got a cockney accent. Would the moron have said it in real life? No way. It's truly pathetic. The way I am in real life is how I am on here. And that's the way uh huh uh huh I like it.

mistlethrush Wed 17-Jun-09 12:28:16

But some people do DB. But I wouldn't say that its a generalisation that can be applied to everyone on MN. And it does tend to depend on where the conversation has gone to - or indeed where it started. I tend to try to stay away from threads where people are being particularly rude - perhaps you could try the same and see where it gets you?

RumourOfAHurricane Wed 17-Jun-09 12:29:09

I'm nice!

Challenge people on the said thread if you don't like what they have said. I do.

We all love each other really, and there are quite often tears before bedtime.

whoisasking Wed 17-Jun-09 12:29:52

Well db people don't have to "talk" that way; they just like to.

If you're uncomfortable with swearing/harsh opinions/the odd bit of name calling, then I'd suggest you try a fluffier forum. smile

Oh, and BTW, if you're talking about the thread I think you're talking about, the poster getting called a bitch and being generally sweared at, has written some stuff which, although it doesn't contain bad language, I personally find GROSSLY offensive.

londonone Wed 17-Jun-09 12:30:06

junglist - How on earth can someone tell what accent you have on an internet forum?

RumourOfAHurricane Wed 17-Jun-09 12:30:31

Mistle - not sure I recall permission being granted for you to leave our thread??!!!


PS, I'm nice too and don't think I've ever told anyone to fuck off.

<wonders if I have>

RumourOfAHurricane Wed 17-Jun-09 12:31:53

BIWI- I'm nicer than you.

Fuck off.


davidbowie Wed 17-Jun-09 12:32:30

Well you all seem to know each other, just I wouldnt speak that way face to face and its seems a bit off putting to newbies, and now Im hoping someone doesnt tell me to f off then

I always thought you were a bitch, shiney. You and your haikus. Pretentious as well.


mrsruffallo Wed 17-Jun-09 12:33:28

f off then

RumourOfAHurricane Wed 17-Jun-09 12:34:07

Still cringing slightly about the Haikus...

DB- I don't know everyone..but the more you post, the more you become part of.

Welcome anyway!

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:34:12

Because the thread was about talking properly and I admitted to dropping h's and t's. Next thing I was being attacked by 5 different people, who in real life wouldn't have said a word. I'm fuming over it again now!!!

davidbowie Wed 17-Jun-09 12:34:33

whoisasking I wasn't talking about any particular thread

cory Wed 17-Jun-09 12:35:04

Quite agree. It is Netmums' accepted role in life to be soft and fluffy. If they fall down on the job- you go and tell them!

Meanwhile we will stick to our role which is to tell it like it is.

cory Wed 17-Jun-09 12:35:25

Quite agree. It is Netmums' accepted role in life to be soft and fluffy. If they fall down on the job- you go and tell them!

Meanwhile we will stick to our role which is to tell it like it is.

londonone Wed 17-Jun-09 12:36:26

Thanks junglist, that makes sense I was v confused, had images of someone having some sort of speaking computer!

whoisasking Wed 17-Jun-09 12:36:29


I actually do swear too much in real life. It's dreadful actually, and something I keep trying to stop doing, it's actually harder to kick than the old cigs.

mrsruffallo Wed 17-Jun-09 12:37:20

Junglist, I've got a Cockney accent too and have had a few on here about it.
Link me to that thread!!

EccentricaGallumbits Wed 17-Jun-09 12:37:54

i left netmums for this very reason. bunch of infighting, sniping, rude, vulgar beatches grin.
feel much more at home here.

EccentricaGallumbits Wed 17-Jun-09 12:38:39

was that a bit libelous? am i in trouble?

VinegarTits Wed 17-Jun-09 12:39:13

I am nice some of the time

<polishes rusty halo>

GypsyMoth Wed 17-Jun-09 12:40:12

Danielle on netmums is legendary....... You think it's nasty here? She comes on a netmums thread and it gets REALLY nasty!!

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:42:36

I'm so sorry I can't link I can just about switch it on!! The gist of it was that I sound thick and uneducated and when I said I was doing a degree I was told unis have dumbed down. Then I started picking on people who were blasting me telling them about punctuation etc! And I called someone a name. I was livid! grin

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:44:48

Oh and I'll look out for any similar threads in future so we can team up, my fellow cockney sparra!

whoisasking Wed 17-Jun-09 12:45:27

I have a REALLY "common" Sarf East London accent. Why should I change the way I speak? It's a regional accent.

Grrrr, you're making me cross now junglist wink

mistlethrush Wed 17-Jun-09 12:45:56

Shiney - who said I needed permission to leave!!! shock Anyway, I haven't left, I'm just visiting some other locations too... grin

mrsruffallo Wed 17-Jun-09 12:48:57

You are quite right, whoisasking it is a regional accent but one that seems fair game to take the pee out of.

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:50:42

How dare you be from Sarf? I'm from Norf Tottenham sides luv so don't test me or I'll rip you to shreds on here and I will WILL smile sweetly if I ever meet you for real OK!!??

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:51:20


grumblinalong Wed 17-Jun-09 12:51:26

I'm well nice, innit.

whoisasking Wed 17-Jun-09 12:54:22

Oh I know!

I met someone for the first time last week, we've been chatting online for a few years and get on famously. He said "You don't sound anything like the voice I gave you in my head"..I sort of laughed and asked him what he meant and then he said...."I thought you'd sound more intelligent"


So I threw im down the apples and pears and then kicked im wiv me plates of meat. wink

VinegarTits Wed 17-Jun-09 12:54:24

grin at this thread

its turned from being polite on netmums to a norf sarf devide grin

whoisasking Wed 17-Jun-09 12:56:17


You wanna get out me grill love, I'm telling you, I won't be putting up wiv this sort of shit from no Tottenham girl.

*Bermondsey massive*


junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:57:37

How dare you spell divide incorrectly Vinegar. I'm so SO superior to you right now because of that!!! grin grin

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 12:58:36

It's not girl it's gal down my ends grin

flowerybeanbag Wed 17-Jun-09 13:00:06

ROFL at netmums grin

Of course everyone should be polite. It's perfectly possible to engage in debate and 'tell it like it is' without swearing or namecalling. And I think in face most people can and do manage that. Actual swearing and namecalling like you describe isn't that common on here I don't think. People do tell it like it is, including harsh and forthright opinions, but most people are able to do so without swearing ime.

flowerybeanbag Wed 17-Jun-09 13:00:50

in fact

pembslass Wed 17-Jun-09 13:01:44

Vinegartits: I've been darkside for a long long time mate grin

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 13:04:10

I thought you meant in face as in in real life. You're so good even your mistakes make sense. Go flowery!! grin

flowerybeanbag Wed 17-Jun-09 13:06:04


pembslass Wed 17-Jun-09 13:09:45

I really like swearing and calling people names. I feel really hurt by the contents of this fucking thread. I think I might piss off to bollocking netmums where it sounds like a right old laugh

McSnail Wed 17-Jun-09 13:16:17

To the OP - I'm a member of another forum, a teaching one, and if you think people are impolite on mumsnet you would be APPALLED at the teaching forum (which i really like) Compared to there, mumsnet is netmums. With regards to fluffiness and niceness, iyknwim.

McSnail Wed 17-Jun-09 13:17:27

In fact, I've held back from saying what I really think to a few posters on here because it doesn't appear to be the done thing to be too harsh!

chocolatekitten Wed 17-Jun-09 13:24:00

I was on the receiving end of some unpleasant verbal abuse after innocently joining a debate. Was nothing but polite yet told to foff, made fun of , bullied . Unfortunately , my opinions happened to be disliked by an old well known netter that everyone panders to so it was inevitable everyone will try to impress her by abusing me.

It seriously upset me, had never been previously personally sweared at in rl. It affected me badly for a couple of days in rl. My relationships with children etc suffered . Very traumatic and it is only recently I have come back to mumsnet. I only read now , don't dare to post , this is the only time to vent what happened in my case and to agree with you.

I wish all the smug posters boasting about their verbal abuse and trying to justify it , just stop and think.

Mumsnet can be truly the best but it can also be just too vulgar and barbaric, sadly.

McSnail Wed 17-Jun-09 13:27:45

Aw, chocolatekitten. That's a shame. Seriously though, I don't think mumsnet is nearly as bad as some other fora for abuse. I once stupidly posted about a relationship problem I was having (on my teaching forum) looking for a bit of sisterly support and was made to feel much worse, haha!

Just ignore the fuckers if they make you feel bad. They're not your life.

Goober Wed 17-Jun-09 13:32:06

<<Runs in.>>

<<Flashes norks.>>

<<Legs it. Giggling.>>

PuppyMonkey Wed 17-Jun-09 13:32:28

Fancy that. David Bowie posts on netmums! It's a wonder he's got time. shock

pembslass Wed 17-Jun-09 13:32:28

kitten you are a soppy thing. Call me some names-honestly it will cheer you up.

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 13:33:13

That's a perfect example Kitten. Bump the thread, call them all tossers and I'll back you up with my Tottenham attitude!

ReneRusso Wed 17-Jun-09 13:38:55

I have never been to Netmums. Wtf is a ticker?

pembslass Wed 17-Jun-09 13:41:11

<<strolls in>>
<<flashes rat>>
<<makes a sound like a moose mating>>
<<strolls out again>>

ClaireDeLoon Wed 17-Jun-09 13:51:39


A ticker is like this

************************************************************************************** **

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Cycle day 12 - I'll be ovulating soon hurrah!!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Waves to flowerbeanbag - when did you come back? Is all OK now?

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Wed 17-Jun-09 13:58:48

You are all cunts.


whoisasking Wed 17-Jun-09 14:00:10

Oh SHIT Reality, you just made me do an actual snortlaugh then.

And now my boss is giving me the eye. (and not in a good way)

flowerybeanbag Wed 17-Jun-09 14:08:24

Hi BIWI <<waves>> Came back a few days ago after a fortnight off, I'm absolutely fine, just felt in need of a bit of a break which has done the trick!

ReneRusso Wed 17-Jun-09 14:16:50

thanks clairedeloon, that is quite fluffy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Off to join Netmums - hurrah ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RumourOfAHurricane Wed 17-Jun-09 14:31:16

shock at Reality.

Not fecking surprised though...


bleh Wed 17-Jun-09 15:01:19

YANBU. Those gals over on Netmums are right b-hatches

caramelwaffle Wed 17-Jun-09 18:13:58

<<caramel grabs goober>>

<<pushes goober back in to the room and shouts "shake ya' norks again, luv">>

<<runs out of room giggling>>

caramelwaffle Wed 17-Jun-09 18:18:00

~~~~~OH~ ~~~~~THIS~~~~IS~~~A~~~TICKER~~~~~HOW~~~~~FARKIN'~~~~~~~~~~~ANNOYING~~~~~~

I did wonder

pickyvic Wed 17-Jun-09 18:27:24

i came to MN cos the forum i usually use was just getting to ridiculous for words on the whole be nice to each other thing, to the point where you just couldnt say anything.

i did once say on there that i wished i could tell one chavvy poster to fuck off but it got modded....i seemed to get modded a fair bit on there and i always just thought i was straight talking, but seems on there you have to humour people! (even chavs have feelings eh?) anyway i said sorry then came here.

have to say im a bit nervous on here as it can be a bit fiesty! but its refreshing to find somewhere where there is a little bit of freedom.

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 19:04:55

Yes chavs do have feelings. I am one, working class and proud. I don't think much of snobs though, they don't know the half of it which is why they have time and inclination to worry about spelling and other judgey passtimes

pickyvic Wed 17-Jun-09 19:14:14

im working class too so dont take my post the wrong way...or have i just dropped a clanger within days of coming to MN? when i said chav i didnt mean working class. think youd have had to see this poster to know what i meant. didnt mean to offend!

sweetnitanitro Wed 17-Jun-09 19:16:08

I am much more polite on the internet, in real life I tell people to fuck off all the time.

junglist1 Wed 17-Jun-09 19:17:38

Not offended luv, I REALLY am a chav though (massive hoop earrings, MacKenzie jacket etc!) I'm an intelligent well read one though, not a Jeremy Kyler (all the time) grin

Just randomoly posting that my sister's MIL had that David Bowie Back in the 70's he's not all that

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now