to have just told off a friend of DD1 who just *rang* the homeline for a chat...........

[psychomum5]

.....ooh makes me mad.

DD1 is knackered and gave up watching a film with DH and is in bed, just dropping off to sleep.

a school-friend just rang. not her best friend, just a school friend, but one who seems to have no social skills with regards to telephone etiquette (sp??) ie, she often rings past 10pm and before 7am

I have just had words........not shouting strong words (I told her that past 9pm is actually not ok for phone calls unless emergency and she needs to understand this as it is very rude!).

I am fed up with it, and DD1 seems not to have gotten thru to her (I know she has tried to tell her before that if she want s to ring, please text first to make sure she is still up and ok for calls), hence my ire this time.

I also told her to ring back at a decent hour tomorrow to talk, as we are now all in bed (which is not lying). I just hope this time she has understood that she needs to be a little more considerate to other families when picking up the telephone.

[JaquelinehydeAllTheEggs]

I hate this and would have done the same as you.

Well done.

[ItsMargotBeaurEGGarde]

wow, I dread the day my children's friends phone at all hours too!

I am really anti-social and I take the phone off the hook after about 7pm. I just want to relax in the evening. I have my mobile and if somebody is desperateto get hold of me, then they still can! but I can screen

Oh, sometimes people give out to me "I tried to phone you but the phone is always engaged!" and they're cross with me.

[psychomum5]

it is so damn rude!!

my children know my feelings on the phone.

hell, all MY FRIENDS know my feelins, and so text or email to see if I am ok to talk (most times I am, but after 9pm to me is cut off and is so 'my time', unless of course emergency).

sadly this girl seems not to have been taught this social skill

[psychomum5]

PLUS

DD1 has a mobile...is the friend not able ti text or ring that one first??

altho.........she switched it off as she has gone to bed....

but then again, surely that should be a good hint that she is not taking calls

[KingCanuteIAm]

After years of having the phone ring at all hours because of my stepmother being a frutloop (don't ask it is too long and dull to go into!) I always answer the phone after 10 (9 is my prefered cut off but I think after 10 is just plain rude) by saying "KingCanute here, please state your emergency" and give the caller a few seconds to convince me it is an emergency. If they fail I hang up - seems to have been quite effective so far

[TrillianEAstraEgg]

"we are now all in bed (which is not lying)"

you are MNing in bed!

DD1 needs to make friends with girls who are not so thick. 15 is old enough to be able to tell the time.

[sazm]

how old is she?
its really rude,i dont know anyone who would phone at that time of night

[Alibabaandthe40bunnies]

YANBU. I wouldn't call even my parents or brothers after 10pm, even if it was the weekend. If the phone goes after 10pm or before 8am then I automatically assume it's an emergency and panic accordingly!!

Can you have a word with this girl's parents?

[controlfreakythecontrolfreak]

oooh, you are all really living!

[nooka]

Well how old is your dd? If a teen with a normal bedtime of 10.30 or later, then ringing after 9pm seems fairly normal. Different families have different etiquette's - mine usually make calls after 9pm as we tend to eat at eight. So this child may not be intending to be rude, she just might come from a family that is sociable later at night than yours.

You are however not unreasonable in being peeved about it.

[psychomum5]

girl is 15.

I know her mother.......shame of it all she has not many social skills either so I am not sure she would get it TBH. (not meaning to sound rude, but she is one of those who gets too close when chatting to you in the playground, listens in to conversations and then gets half a story which she then says to her DD, who relays to my DD1, who then comes home cross with ME about something not related to anything I was talking about in the first place).

so no, the mother would have no impact

I am hoping me actually telling her might do this time, but I am not olding my breath.........I will start to adopt kindcanutes method in future!

[TrillianEAstraEgg]

Don't be silly control freak, it doesn't matter if she's been told to not call after 10 at night (= everyone is in bed and boring ) or if she was told not to call before 11 in the morning (= parents were up all night boozing ). The point is she has been told muliple times and asked to text first to see if it is a conventient time to call, but still can't manage to do this.

[sazm]

yep,but the girl has already asked her friend to try her mobile first,so then it is unreasonable for her to still phone,
i would also be annoyed,

[Alibabaandthe40bunnies]

Controlfreak it's just common politeness, especially if she has been asked not to call the house late/early in the past.

[psychomum5]

this has been going on since they were in yr7 BTW (they are now yr10, so 3 yrs!!), and this is the first time I have lost my temper (and even then, it was just telling her that it is rude and please phone back at a more convenient time as now is too late, especially as we are all in bed!)

[psychomum5]

oh and trillian, yes, I get to MN in bed

[CherryChoc]

Can you still leave the phone off the hook? If ours falls/gets knocked off the hook, it makes a loud alarm noise. It's annoying. You have to unplug it from the wall if you want to not recieve calls.