To nap in the daytime with ds2? To not want breastfeeding referred to as bitty? AND To not think i am ruining my childs chances of ever sleeping alone?

[MamaMaiasaura]

1:Taking nap with ds2 in the daytime.

He is 1 and i still bfeed him and end up sleeping with him in morning after school run and then at times in the afternoon before school run.

I ask because it means i dont always get out to toddler group, and when i did today (albiet late) the mums were really shocked i had slept in the daytime..

2:Not wanting breastfeeding referred to as bitty?

Popped into new family centre today to see what it was like and to register. Was lovely and woman was really nice.

Ds2 had a few tears as was nearing lunchtime and he had just been to toddler group and was feeling tired. So i gave him a give feed. Anyway got round to talking about length of time i would feed him for, i said i dont really have a limit. Then i laughed and said although when he goes to uni it might be tricky to which she cooed ooooo bitty. Ok in context i know she wasnt trying to be offensive and i was making a joke but i already got the vibes of eww. (maybe i was still prickley from toddler group and having a grumpy toddler!)

3: To not think i am ruining ds2's chances of ever sleeping alone?

He still sleeps in his cot in our room and still wakes at times in the night, not all nights but frequently enough. Sometimes he ends up in the bed because it is easier and we are all happy. My mother in all her wisdom took it upon herself to tell me that i am completely wrong. We were never in her room and in nursery even in the hospital and that i am making things extremely hard. I said i didnt agree as ds1 sleeps happily in his own room and i think that i am helping ds2 feel happy and secure. I do plan to move him to his room but when it feels right but i am pissed off annoyed by my mothers pearls of wisdom when she is a completely different generation and did things very differently and nothow i would.

[NoBiggy]

That all seems fair.

YANBU

[cmotdibbler]

YANBU on all accounts. I sooo wish I could sleep in the day

And bfing a toddler is lovely

[pudding25]

If you are happy with what you are doing, then it is no-one else's business. Tell them to go jump.

[MamaMaiasaura]

I thought i was having a raging hormonal day where the whoel world is out to get me.

[AccidentalMum]

Co-napping is the best bit of being a SAHM to a littly (ie one who still naps, not one who is 'allowed' to BF ). And (sweeping generalisation alert), I think that LOs who are helped to and during sleep when needed become more relaxed, happier sleepers longterm.

[TheNinkynork]

YANBU My DS is still BF at 20 months and showing no sign of stopping or sleeping through the night.

I am also housebound after and before the school run because of his nap, the timing of which varies wildly. I find that having the kitchen tidy and a load of washing on always makes me feel less slatternly when I slope off to bed.

It'll be better when it's lighter / warmer / sunnier. That's what I keep telling myself anyway. Toddler groups and swimming can wait until Spring IMO.

[LaDiDaDi]

YANBU.

I loved to have a little nap in the daytime with dd when she was younger and I still like her coming into our bed in the night.

[MrsMattie]

YANBU. People have such funny ideas about what others 'should' be doing. Do what works for you and your child. Sod everyone else.

Oh, and 'bitty' remarks creep me out. So weird.

[cheesesarnie]

do what you want.so long as you are happy and your babies happy-who cares!

[MamaMaiasaura]

Ninkynork (love the name) that is exactly what i do put a load of washing on after clearing breakfast stuff and unloading dishwasher and toddle off upstairs for lovely feed and sleep. (I also put a sign up to say dont ring doorbell as baby sleeping and mummy )

Accidental - I hope so as i really dont wnat my mum saying 'told you so'

[itsajollyholidayformary]

DD and I have been a bit poorly over the last couple of days and as such we have been off work/nursery.

I have loved us sleeping for 2 hours face to face in our bed the last two days. And Dh joined us today too, which was lovely too. Just perfect.

YANBU.

[raisingrrrl]

My ds still sleeps cuddled up with us at 2, and I miss bf-ing so much. I would have liked to carry on but it was too painful during pregnancy.

If your mother starts in at you again, you should tell her all about the attachment issues you have, and how you've always suffered with insomnia as an adult.

[TheNinkynork]

I need to make a sign too, Awen. The window-cleaners keep disturbing us.

The photo of your DS cuddling his blanket is gorgeous btw

[shonaspurtle]

1. Sleeping when your baby sleeps is one of the perks of being on mat leave imo, and you'd be mad not to!

1. The whole "bitty" thing is crass and sets my teeth on edge.

1. Ds is two and still sleeps in our room (it being a one bed flat and all). When we're away anywhere he often sleeps in a room on his own and is absolutely fine with that. We also take him into bed with us if he wakes in the night. I am very keen to maximise my own sleep in any way possible and that's the quickest and easiest way to get him to settle. Win-win imvho.

YANBU to want to do what you do without other people telling you not to.

[CamelToe]

I am very keen to maximise my own sleep in any way possible and that's the quickest and easiest way to get him to settle. Win-win imvho.

i like that but have never said it,

dd is a troublesome sleeper,

some nights once, others 6 or 7 times,

no routine, no habits,

it is hard,

the thing that saves me is when she does wake in the night she is calm and settled and goes off again quickly with a sparrow feed of milk,

[Desiderata]

It isn't a generational thing at all. Some women have kept babies in the room with them and some women haven't, since man begat woman.

Or the other way round ..

Do what you want, and stop worrying about it.

[ThumbBurns]

with you all the way on all scores Awen, Ds is 13.5mo and still bf's and quite often we have his mid-morning snack feed on the bed so that he can go straight into mid-morning nap and so can I.
no one has said "bitty" to me yet...
If Ds wakes past 4am it can be quite hard to get him to settle again - if he refuses and starts to stand up in his cot, I end up giving in and taking him back to bed with me, which allows us both to go back to sleep. He doesn't wake at that time every night, probably 2-3 times a week - the rest of the time he will stay in his cot all night.

[MamaMaiasaura]

Ninky - have updated pics.. inclu a more recent sleeping one

Thumb - get you completely on the 4am thing. No way do i want my day starting that early either

I did do something that i would expect would have some neg comments When ds2 was in tears for having pen taken away from him.. i gave him breastfeed to settle... (gulp) but he was sad and it makes him happy..

[MamaMaiasaura]

Must go to bed now.. will pop in tomorrow (have to now i said i will lol)

[ThumbBurns]

I said to a friend today that one of the reasons I still bf is laziness - I don't have to worry about taking drinks out with me, it's the easiest way to get him to go to sleep and if he's throwing a strop and won't settle then a bf is a great option for defusing the situation!

Not REAL laziness you understand..

[MillyR]

YANBU. My dd slept in our bed until she was 3, and was bf until she was 26 months. She is now 7 and I have never had any problems with her; she has always slept through and she never comes and gets into our bed. There is nothing to worry about.

[oldnewmummy]

God I'm so jealous. Wish I could nap during the day.

No, YANBU. Would do the naps if I could, would BF if I could (DS adopted), we do co-sleep which I'm convinced is the best thing for us (and damn nice being woken up by a kiss) and try to ignore the "helpful" comments.

[Racingsnake]

Sleep at any time!

[BouncingTartan]

Awen

1. Bloody good idea. I sometimes do it, gives me a chance to catch up on some sleep as my ds is also still waking through the night (glad I'm not alone!). LOLat the sign!

1. Rude and ignorant. Clearly someone has ishooes

3, You are doing fine, as I said on our pn thread I didn't go into my own room until I was 2!!

I'm very lucky because my mum lets me do things my own way, she appreciates that things have changed greatly - in fact she really encouraged me to wait to wean ds onto solids when I started cracking under peer pressure

I would just agree with everything she says to you but continue to do your own thing - much less stressful.