to be annoyed with DP

[MadreInglese]

DP is usually back from work at roughly 6.15 every night (give or take 10 minutes or so). Last night I was going out and we had spoken in the day about me needing to leave in time to pick a friend up at 7.45 and be somewhere by 8.

7.45 comes and no sign of DP. Phoning him only goes straight to answerphone. I am stuck between being annoyed that he's not told me he'd be late and worried that something awful has happened (he has a very physical job and is as clumsy as a hippo so very likely to injure himself).

He rolls in at 7.50 with a shrug and mumbles something about having to work late. I manage to get out the door, get my friend, and arrive where we're supposed to be just on time.

This morning he asks if I'm 'still sulking' about him being late home. He just doesn't understand the courtesy of a quick text or call to let me know what's going on. He thinks it was a complete overreaction that I thought he might have had an accident.

I know it wasn't the end of the work that he was late, but at what point should I start to worry? 2 hours late? 2 days late? Arrrgghhhh!!! Why can't he just COMMUNICATE??

[auntyspan]

cos he's man - they have an inherent ability not to see the consequence of their actions.

Sorry

[MadreInglese]

end of the world not work!

[1wish]

Thats most men for you i find. They can't seem to grasp that if they tell you what they're doing (i.e going to be late) then yes you may be mad but only for a minute, but at least you know.

Rather than leaving it and then you're furious, which in their mind backs up the thought that they were right not to tell you in the first place if that make sense

[mustsleep]

yanbu

dh could not understand why i was pissed off that i could not contact him at work for 4 hours yesterday cos his mobile had no signal and does not think that i need head offices main number

i am 36 weeks pregnant and had an extremely fast labour last time so i think that i can;t really be waiting around for hours for him to call me back

[MadreInglese]

1wish you are so right!

It wouldn't have mattered if I knew he would be late, I could have called my friend and changed plans a little, or dropped DD at my mum's for half an hour.

[blinks]

men are knobs

(can you tell I just had a fight with my knob)

[goingslowlymad]

yanbu at all.

Mine would always let me know if he was going to be late.

He does often moan at me though for not letting him know if I won't be in when he gets home as he worries. He also accuses me of leaving the house looking as if I have been abducted. He says I literally seem to decide to go, and go. Leave the tv on, lights on, mid-sandwich etc

[1wish]

Thanks madre
I learnt this a long time ago with an ex of mine who was worse in that he would lie about how long he was going to be.

Situation_ I'll meet you at 3pm, 3pm comes no sign, wait 5 minutes and call him. "oh i'm nearly there,i'll be a couple of minutes" Relief on my part. 10 minutes pass, so i call again. "Yeah i'm just parking the car" Another 20 minutes would pass, by this time i would be fuming and when he does turn up, i'd have a go at him.

His response "this is why i didn't tell you i'd be longer, i knew you'd flip!" Ahhh

And he did this all the time, he just couldn't grasp that if he told me he would be late, i would be a little peeved but at least i could go get a coffee or something instead of standing waiting like an idiot.

And no matter how many times i explained this, he just didn't get it. Current dp doesn't grasp it either but isn't so bad fortunately

[MadreInglese]

sorry but am ROFL @ 'leaving the house looking as if I have been abducted'