to wish to be left alone by charity muggers at my door??!

[bealos]

now I know that they are collecting for charidee but... please. It's saturday morning, I'm in my pajamas, so no... I'm not in the best space for philanthropic thinking!

I've also noticed that their most recent tactic when you say "I already give to charities thank you" is to say "which ones?"

• Am I then wrong for wanting to say "none of your business" (but really saying "I'd rather not discuss that thank you").

Does anyone have any other "tactics"?

[Flamesparrow]

I tend to go with "I'm just changing a nappy" and they run away quick

[ConnorTraceptive]

No tactics I'm afraid I sually say I'll discuss it with DH - why don't you come back and then I send Dh to turn them down

I'm desperately trying to think of ways to politely shut the door on my window cleaner. He talks for ages and then asks me to put the kettle on for him and the "lads" wouldn't mind but there are 7 of them and it's "can you do 3 teas, 2 white with sugar , 1 black without, 1 coffee with , 1 without etc"

Sorry not relevant but I like to moan about it whenever the opportunity arises!

[RubberDuck]

I have a big sign on the wall by the bell which says

NO (in big red letters) cold callers, sellers, advertising.

A few people have dared ring the door people since the sign has gone up (though nowhere near as many as before) but then I get to open the door, say nothing and just point at the sign then shut the door again

[expatinscotland]

I have an American accent, so I tend to tell them I'm just in town for a visit or as a student or some other temporary thing.

Then I start to bore them with untrue tales about my immigration woes - I don't have any, I'm a naturalised UK national - and ask them if they know any charities that assist people with visa issues, illegal immigrants or visa overstayers.

They usually go away quickly and don't come back.

It's like those salespeople who ring up and try to sell you windows and conservatories.

My MIL tells them it's a council house she's renting, even though it's not and they own the house outright.

[Maidamess]

You are all too nice!(Apart from Rubber Duck)

Connor,if your window cleaner starts to get a bit too chatty just say,'Sorry, I'm in the middle of something'. If they start asking for hot beverages (!?) politely say 'Sorry, I'm really in a rush!'

Bealos, my line with anyone thats trying to get money from me in my own home is 'Sorry, I don't buy/sign up for etc/ anything at the door'
I do feel sorry for the teenagers selling dusters and the like, they try their best puppy dog eyes.

[RubberDuck]

Oh I used to like the conservatory people who used to ring up years ago. I would sound really enthusiastic, get to the point where they were about to book an appointment THEN drop into the conversation that I lived in a first floor flat .

[RubberDuck]

I figure I'm actually doing them a favour. I did door-to-door for one day as a student (gawd, never again) and Kleeneze for about 2 weeks before ds2 was born.

If you know you're definitely not going to make a sale, it saves you so much time just to move on without having to do the whole sales patter thing.

Now swearing and obnoxiousness is not on, and is the main reason I gave up most times (that and the fact I hated every minute of it, lol).

[expatinscotland]

It depends. We get a lot Polish people selling stuff like pencil drawings, and they can usually be talked down a few bob. Also, I like it when they come over because it saves me putting stuff on Freecycle or taking it to a charity shop - they always take whatever we have to give away quite gladly, but hey, it's good stuff (kids' clothes in good nick, books, bits and bobs, etc.).

But they're not asking for money, they're selling something.

[Karen999]

We get them all the time, and people selling conservatories, garage conversions, mono-blocking, painting etc....it really gets on my nerves.....also we seem to have an endless supply of art students at the moment selling their work.....

My neighbours down the road have a sign saying "no cold callers" !!

[Sidge]

YANBU I hate cold calling for anything.

The energy people are just as bad - trying to get you to switch to their supplier. As if you would suddenly decide on your doorstep "oh that's a good idea, sod doing any research or comparisons I'll just sign up right now." Yeah right.

I tell them the house is rented/that I'm the nanny/I'm housesitting etc. Saves the spiel.

The best one was when I said my husband makes the decisions, so I couldn't sign anything. The salesperson said what, nothing? No I said, if I do he'll beat me I'm wicked aren't I? Got rid of him PDQ though!!

[RubberDuck]

I think particularly if you live on a modern housing estate, you're seen as easy pickings. I know from my student days that salespeople would be bussed to large estates for the day, hit the area then get bussed to a different estate the next.

When we used to live on a rather more confusing street (our house was actually only accessible by footpath and our garage was on a separate block) we never got bothered. Mind you... the postman used to have problems finding us too You win some, you lose some.

[luminarphrases]

some energy people were at my door the other day and when i asked if i could take the info away and look at it, they said 'yes, we'll come back in five minutes'. when i said, thats not enough time, they asked why.. because i don't tend to make financial decisions on the doorstop wearing my dressing gown with a 3 y.o round my ankle, thanks

[RubberDuck]

Be really careful wth energy salespeople too. I used to work in the new signups dept of a large energy firm. All the salespeople are freelance and get paid per person they sign up. The amount of complaints we got about dubious practises and outright lies they used to say to get people to sign up were outrageous.

The worst one is where they tell you that you're not signing up for switching, you're signing up to get more info. Unfortunately, a lot of the elderly in particular fell for this

This was in the early days just after the market was opened up so you could switch suppliers, but I don't doubt similar practises still happen.

I never ever EVER buy anything on the doorstep or from a cold caller on the phone or spam email.

[Lulumama]

i just say that i am not prepared to give my bank details to a stranger on the doorstep! and thank them politely for their time as it must be a shite job

i always buy dusters etc from teh young lads who sell, even though i think £9 for 3 dusters or tea towels is a rip off, but i do think at least they are trying and having to carry round a huge holdall of stuff all day must knacker your back

[SheikYerbouti]

Funnily enough, I typed this letter this morning, which I now have taped to my front door

Dear Cold Callers,

I love paying through the nose for my gas and electricity supply, it really is marvellous, so you can guarantee I won?t be interested in saving money with your company.

And it doesn?t end there!

My windows are superb examples of 1980s glazing, so ringing the doorbell will be a little pointless as I won?t want to change them. They are here to stay. I live in a 1985 time warp anyway, so I probably won?t answer the door, as I will be too busy ?Choosing Life,? just like my idols Wham!

I am also not interested in helping charity, mainly because I am a mean, penny-pinching old trout who firmly believes that charity begins at home. If you want to know how mean I am, ask my children, who only got a single potato each for Christmas.

Finally, I don?t want my carpets to be cleaned ? I am currently growing valuable colonies of penicillin ? you?ll thank my carpets next time you have a chest infection. And as I don?t have a drive, I don?t need it to be tarmaced, thank you very much for asking.

Last week (10-15 February 2008) I had no less that 8 different cold callers at my door ? all of whom had the same answer: NO!

If you have read this far, I admire your persistence and stamina however, I STILL WILL NOT BE INTERESTED IN WHAT YOU HAVE TO SELL.

Signed,
The Grumpy Old Curmudgeon Within.
Ring the bell at your peril!

[RubberDuck]

I hereby guarantee that this week you will get one of those meal voucher schemes where you can eat out really "cheaply" (as long as you spend £40 up front) and someone selling dusters

[SheikYerbouti]

Probably

They always come at the most inopportune moments (Like when I am on the loo) and they normally come round when I am expecting someone or a parcel, so I answer the door thinking it's them.

I had someone call rount at 8pm last week trying to get me to sign up for Scottish Power

[SheikYerbouti]

I hate them ringing me too. They normally get extremely short shrift from me when they do. Although I am amused with the varations of pronunciation of my surname they come up with

[madamez]

I just go 'NO thanks' and shut the door. I also cut across crappy learned-sales-techniques by saying 'What are you trying to sell me? Get to the point.'

[SheikYerbouti]

I like watching them squirm, and then saying NO after their spiel

Because I am evil

[sparkybabe]

You still get those duster-sellers? We used to gt them about 10 years ago, but there was a big expose in the paper about the ringleaders bussing immigrants/students in at the crack o dawn, leaving them there all day and collecting after dark. The leaders would take 90% of the money, and charge the immigrants rent /food etc out of the 10% left. It was a huge scandal down here for a while, and it stopped everyne buying. We havent' seen them for years!

[Phatmouse]

I give them a big smile and tell them to f**k off, it take them a second to register due to the smile, I wll not accept sales people, faith pushers or beggers at my door, its my HOME and I refuse to have it invaded. Now if I could just build up the courage to do it to the kids who pack my bags badly at supermarkets to raise money I would be very happy, but I don't, in fact I have got cashback just to pay them to squash my bread, they really really should be banned.