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AIBU?

to think this driving instructor can't just send DD home because she isn't doing that well?

44 replies

DD2NC · 16/01/2017 13:41

It's DD's 3rd lesson. She's doing okay, driving around, but needing to still have some reminders called out to her. He said to her at the start of this lesson (3rd) that he is going to try not calling out and see how she does, she did struggle a bit and after about 45 mins in, she is back at my door! (Meant to be 2 hours) and he normally calls out to me (I'm always out the front) I work in the garage and he said "she isn't concentrating today, so we are going to give it a miss" I didn't see the issue with that until I spoke to her and she still had to pay for an hour and that she doesn't understand how she wasn't concentrating, she just wasn't doing everything perfectly. I think this is awful tbh, AIBU?

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Gileswithachainsaw · 16/01/2017 13:44

Wtf does he expect three lessons In.

I hope you didn't buy a block with him

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Imnotaslimjim · 16/01/2017 13:46

FFS three lessons in I wasn't yet on the main roads and kept stalling!

If you've paid for a block, ask for your money back pro rata and find another instructor. He's obviously not suited!

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d270r0 · 16/01/2017 13:46

Yes its awful. Get a different instructor. The right instructor can make a massive difference in confidence. ( Take it from me, I had 5 !)

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RumAppleGinger · 16/01/2017 13:47

Change instructor. She's only on her third lesson. What exactly does he expect! If it were me I would not feel confident getting back in a car with him and I have no doubt that he would not have tried that shit with an adult. He's taking the piss. Change instructor.

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DD2NC · 16/01/2017 13:48

It's a shame because she actually really liked him until now! I paid for a block of 10 hours (5 lessons)... Am I allowed to request that back?

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Yankeedoodledickhead · 16/01/2017 13:48

Terrible. Chuck him and find another.

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Tenshidarkangel · 16/01/2017 13:49

Had similar with an instructor, got really annoyed at me for indicating the wrong way (I'm dyslexic so left and right is an issue at times), forcefully grabbed my hand at the end of the lesson and wrote L and R on my hands. I was humiliated.
I cancelled the remaining lessons and found someone else who got me through my test.

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ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 16/01/2017 13:50

Is there any possibility that she is actually driving dangerously and he was too scared to take her out?

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DD2NC · 16/01/2017 13:51

ItsAll aren't all newbies considered 'dangerous'? Anyway, even if so, he should have said they go back to a quiet area instead of the main road, surely?

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alltouchedout · 16/01/2017 13:52

Is there any possibility that she is actually driving dangerously and he was too scared to take her out?
He's a driving instructor. If this is the case he needs a career change sharpish.

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Imnotaslimjim · 16/01/2017 13:53

itsall unless she was drifting into oncoming traffic, she won't have been dangerous. Getting too close to the vehicle in front or even to the kerb can be stopped, the instructor has a brake! If she was dangerous, he should have told her that.

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amusedbush · 16/01/2017 13:54

Is there any possibility that she is actually driving dangerously and he was too scared to take her out?

Then he should have taken her somewhere off the main road to practice.

Three lessons in I was still driving around a quiet industrial estate or the demolished housing estate a few miles away. I'd be looking for a new instructor.

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BlueHumbug · 16/01/2017 13:55

Some instructors do this when you get a big discount for a block booking. Better to pay full price one lesson at a time for the first few lessons.

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TheTantrumCometh · 16/01/2017 13:57

I understand that you've paid for the lessons but why on earth does he keep calling to you to give you updates when they pull up? She's at least 17 and he should be dealing with your DD, not you.

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Nydj · 16/01/2017 13:58

I suspect he had double booked or had other plans for the second hour and set her up to fail in the first hour and would definitely consider changing instructors as I'd want an honest and supportive instructive for my child. Your DD'S instructor is possibly not being honest about needing to cancel the second hour or is being very unsupportive or both.

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IWantATardis · 16/01/2017 13:58

Yes, that's pretty bad. If she was struggling - hardly surprising, 3 lessons in - I'd expect a decent instructor to drop back to doing something less challenging on quieter roads, rather than cancel the lesson halfway through.

I'd ask for the money back.

I also agree that finding the right instructor can make a massive difference, so I'd be inclined to start looking for someone else.

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TeenAndTween · 16/01/2017 14:01

On her first lesson DD's driving instructor took her to a multi-lane set of traffic lights, terrified the life out of her, and said she was hopeless! We had warned him that she has dyspraxia which is why we wanted an automatic instructor ...

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CripsSandwiches · 16/01/2017 14:06

Definitely change instructors. Learning to drive is hard and you don't need an instructor that's going to get frustrated if you don't pick it up instantly. Unless she was actually doing something irresponsible (checking her phone while driving or refusing to slow down or something) then there is absolutely no reason for him to end the lesson.

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TheAntiBoop · 16/01/2017 14:16

I had a horrible instructor who spent the two hours shouting and me in tears. After the second lesson my dad called the company and asked to change. The guy came round and spent half an hour shouting at my dad about how crap i was and that I was mollycoddled etc etc

20 years on and I don't have a licence.

So make clear to her that it is him being lazy(he probably wanted to get home early) and nothing to do with her. Half the battle with driving is confidence

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lexi873 · 16/01/2017 14:18

I had similar to this, my instructor took me all around a busy 4 lane roundabout to "see how I coped" on one of my early lessons, then screamed bloody hell at me when I almost crapped myself! I went home in tears and packed in the learning for about two years after that!
Then I found a lovely woman who had good Facebook/online reviews and persevered and passed with her.
Some people aren't right for the job at all

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GeminiRising · 16/01/2017 14:21

Just a thought but some instructors book lessons too close together and therefore they cut lessons short to enable them to get to the next lesson in time...

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harderandharder2breathe · 16/01/2017 14:25

itsall he's the instructor, he needs to judge whether she can safely drive in a particular area and stick to quiet industrial estates until she can be trusted in residential or main roads. She's a learner driver!

Yanbu to ask for the remaining lessons to be refunded and find someone ejse

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KnittingPearl · 16/01/2017 14:30

Change the instructor - a cousin went through three who just got more and more impatient with her, which flustered her and made left and right etc much harder. They eventually found a lovely man who was calm and patient and she had no problems learning with him.

Also, is he with a driving school or on his own - might be worth a line to them too, and definitely be bolshy about a refund or if you don't change instructors, that hour as another lesson - he can't just drop her off but still take the money!

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TwinMummy30 · 16/01/2017 14:30

My DH is a driving instructor and he'd never just cut a lesson short if a person wasn't concentrating. Your DD's instructor doesn't sound professional. Definitely would change him if I was you.

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gamerchick · 16/01/2017 14:34

Change instructor, is it a school? Give them a ring and complain.

Christ I'm nearly 50 hours into lessons and mine had to grab the wheel last lesson. But he doesn't send me home with a slapped wrist.

There will be a perfect fit for her somewhere, it's just finding the right school.

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