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AIBU?

Constant filming of everything!!!

29 replies

everythingis · 09/12/2016 16:34

Just been to watch dd2 very lovely nativity. It would have been much lovelier if all the parents just sat and watched it instead of insisting on photographing/filming constantly which includes standing up and blocking the view/leaning over me and blocking my view/constantly rocking the bench seats and shuffling about. Plus not all parents have switched off all the key noises. It was a bit much or am
I bu?

OP posts:
NancyDonahue · 09/12/2016 16:44

Our school get someone in to film it and we can buy the dvd for £5. It's always really good. We can take photos of our dcs but at the end of the performance.

everythingis · 09/12/2016 17:10

That's what I expected Nancy - I would be fine with that - much less invasive!

OP posts:
StripyHorse · 09/12/2016 18:33

Our school won't let you because of safeguarding. You can see a teacher at the end so you can take a pic of your dc if you want to. Was lovely... just able to sit and enjoy the performance.

NavyandWhite · 09/12/2016 18:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dingdongthewitchishere · 09/12/2016 18:36

You should suggest that the school gets one official film to buy if you wish. I like a film of my kids, so their grand-parents can see them too, or even their dad when he's not around. It's a much better system than full families turning up with 6 or 8 members and taking all the seats!

StripyHorse · 09/12/2016 18:43

My DCs' school doesn't allow photographing / filming concerts for safeguarding reasons. If you want a picture of your child / children in costume you can see the teachers at the end to arrange this.
It's lovely, you can just sit and enjoy!

everythingis · 09/12/2016 19:01

I'm envious! I dread to think how many Facebook accounts my dd now features on without my permission :-(

OP posts:
PebbleInTheMoonlight · 09/12/2016 19:24

I wish our school would record the performance for selling on. My mother is physically disabled and a chronic pain sufferer so travelling 50 miles each way for a 30 minutes show really isn't fair on her so I film the whole thing. She's devastated not to be there in person but loves that she can still see her granddaughters Christmas shows (MIL comes to all of them).

However, I get there stupidly early to sit at the front and record the whole thing from chest height so not interfering with anyone else's view. I also don't post the videos online.

Not everyone is as vacuous as you think.

e1y1 · 09/12/2016 19:32

Our school won't let you because of safeguarding

This ^ School do it, and if^ a parent/guardian were to request to, then a written permission slip is required from every single parent/guardian of every single child in the play.

dingdongthewitchishere · 09/12/2016 20:41

If you don't want your child to appear on a video - filmed by the school - just ensure the teacher keep him/her on the side of the group, so s/he doesn't appear in the film. If there is a very serious safeguarding issue, you wouldn't want the poor kid to be the center of attention anyway. You can respect people need for privacy without punishing the whole group. The child is in the play, not on the film and everybody is happy.

everythingis · 10/12/2016 00:00

I don't mind my kid being in a video filmed by the school. I have signed the generic form agreeing to this.

I sympathise with the poster filming for a relative. I'm not trying to be an arse I just want to watch the shows (which I have to take time off to attend) without being elbowed, disrupted and generally annoyed by all the bloody cameras.

OP posts:
SallyR0se · 10/12/2016 00:09

It's really an epidemic. My sister asked a woman in the row in front to switch seats with her partner at a seated concert as she was filming & blocking my sister's view. They just didn't get it & kept tutting & glowering at my sister throughout the gig. Madness... Do folk even watch these videos after? Or just post them on FB to show off?

altik · 10/12/2016 00:30

I can see both sides...

I agree it's bloody annoying when others film everything - it can be totally selfish and ruin it for others.

But at the same time, I think it's a shame not to be allowed to take photos. I have some lovely pics of me in my school plays as a child, and it is nice every now and then to look back and see childhood friends, remember the plays I was in and to show them to my children. Our old head didn't allow pictures, and I think it's a shame that my eldest will grow up without pictures of her and her friends in school plays etc.

Thankfully, for us, the head changed and the new rules are that we take take photos but not to put them up on facebook. Thankfully most parents are sensible and respect this. I have never seen any of my friends put up big group photos on facebook. If they post, it's only ever of their own children. I like to have the photos of my children, but I keep it for them to look back on and reminisce for when they're older.

crazywriter · 10/12/2016 04:06

My DDs nursery told all we couldn't film the Christmas show last year. One set of parents made a writer request not to allow it for the child's privacy/safety. Something dodgy going on according to the nursery staff. It wouldn't be fair to the child to be just taken out of the show and putting to one side out of view of a camera would mean others would figure out who the child was so that wasn't an option either.

It was filmed in the end but by the nursery and was only shown during a couple of specific slots for parents to go into the nursery and watch.

I take a lot of photos and videos of my girls but it was nice to sit back and just concentrate on the performance. I didn't have to worry about what others around me were doing.

A friend was disappointed she couldn't film the show. But there are so many other moments in life.

Different school now so don't know what the rules will be like in a couple of weeks for her Christmas assembly. I don't think I'm going to bother with the camera anyway though.

ChristmasTreeCat · 10/12/2016 05:44

We are lucky in that one of the parents at our school is a professional cameraman so we have a beautiful filmed version we buy for a small donation to cover costs and a charity donation. I can't wait for my copy. I think people lose out by only ever viewing life through their camera phone.

Sirzy · 10/12/2016 05:53

I took photos and a video of ds doing his part but it was on my phone which was kept at a height that it wouldn't bother anyone.

We are asked to crop any pictures to cut out any other children which I think is fair enough.

Sloper · 10/12/2016 06:23

The problem is, it's endemic in society all the time and drives me mad.

We went to a lights display the other night and all you could see were blinding camera flashes. We spent the entire time ducking in and out of people's way and trying not to be caught on camera while they filmed things like the duckpond with lights reflecting in it, or trying to get the hell past them while they stood solidly in the way getting the perfect shot. It took an hour to do a ten minute walk! And no one was actually looking at the lights! People were just wandering along photoing everything. Gah.

It's beginning to drive me mad, and it's only going to get worse - I can see tiny drones being a thing of the future, constantly hovering around and recording things...

ThoraGruntwhistle · 10/12/2016 06:47

My DC school allows video and photos to be taken but asks that nobody posts anything online. I bet some parents ignore the instruction though. And it's very irritating if you're sitting behind someone who films the whole thing by holding up an iPad all through the show.

ForalltheSaints · 10/12/2016 07:03

Even though the reason given of safeguarding may be an over-reaction in almost all cases I support a ban on parents filming.

heron98 · 10/12/2016 07:05

It's not just school plays that suffer from this - everything does. I went to a gig recently and everyone was filming. Why? Are you really going to sit and watch back some terrible quality film which does no justice to the actual event? It really pisses me off.

NapQueen · 10/12/2016 07:23

But if the other parent can't get to the show its nice to at least film the part where your dc have lines.

Filming the whole thing is bonkers though!

Bananabread123 · 10/12/2016 07:57

I get wanting to take a few photos and videoing a few key bits, though I understand that it can be intrusive if done insensitively. However I don't get why some people seem to want live through their cameras rather than actually enjoy the show (unless perhaps you're doing it for an ill or elderly relative)

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ememem84 · 10/12/2016 08:14

Not so much about nativity/school plays but generally filming/picture taking. When we've been on holiday have seen so many people look at things through cameras/phones. They just don't see things with their eyes.

Mil spent an entire day the last time we were with her filming things/photographing things. Just to "make people jealous" when she posted on fb.

everythingis · 10/12/2016 09:05

At least it's not just me. We went to watch passenger the other week - most of the audience filmed the whole thing. Why????

OP posts:
Nicknameofawesome · 10/12/2016 09:13

Our school has a camera ban during the performance but After the performance we give opportunities for parents to take photos of their kids in costume. It is filmed and we are selling the dvds for £5 but it's on the understanding that it is for personal home use only and no one puts any of it online. Parents are warned that if we find any of it on social media a no camera rule will be in place.

So far this has worked for 4 years and counting. There are enough sensible parents connected together to less sensible ones via social media that we would spot it going up pretty quick.

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