ExDP thinks IABVU.
DS has exDPs surname and is 11 years old. DS is my only dc and I don't plan on having any more. DS is now at an age where I can take him abroad and we can both enjoy a nice holiday.
I've read a few articles about difficulties with border controls when parent and dc have different surnames so I want to change my surname by deed poll so that I have DS's surname.
ExDP thinks that I am 'crazy' and says that changing my surname to HIS surname is wrong. He said that he doesn't want me to take DS abroad without him knowing and that it's HIS surname. My argument is that it is DS's surname and it doesn’t belong solely to exDP.
I'm on ok terms with exDP after a very turbulent period where we were nc for 3 years. I had no idea where he was when we were nc and if it happens again then I just want to get on with my life without trying to track him down because I want to take DS out of the country.
I've got no plans to take DS abroad for anything more than a holiday. Ex is very controlling and I think part of this is that he wants to know where I am and what I am doing.
I don't want to change DS's surname to mine because it's part of his identity and he also has SN so would struggle to adjust to a new name. I am not attached to my surname at all, it's quite a common surname.
So AIBU?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
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AIBU?
To change my name
25 replies
fairgame84 · 28/11/2016 15:25
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