DD having to do toilet checks in men's toilets

(62 Posts)
seriouslyclueless Sun 27-Nov-16 20:29:51

So, just chatting to my DD (17) about her work.
She works in TGI Friday's and generally moans about the stress of it all and I normally smile and nod and offer her sympathy as required and tell her to stick it out and payday always makes it all seem worth it yada yada.
Then she tells me that she has to do toilet checks and quite often men come and just pee while she's in there or go for poo and she has to wait til there done to fill up the toilet roll.
I'm really unhappy about this and feel this is putting her in a really vulnerable position.
Would I be U to phone and voice concerns objet manager tomorrow morning ?
I've said to DD that I'm going to phone and she's happy for me to as says she feels really uncomfortable doing the checks on the men's toilets.

Fluffsnuts Sun 27-Nov-16 20:31:24

YABU. And you'd be really unreasonable to mention it on her behalf. It's just part of her job.

TheSparrowhawk Sun 27-Nov-16 20:31:34

DO NOT RING ON YOUR DD'S BEHALF. She is, to all intents and purposes, an adult. If she has a problem with her workplace, she needs to deal with it.

Frankly, while it's not a great job having to go into the men's loos, I don't think it's the end of the world.

Littlepeople12345 Sun 27-Nov-16 20:31:59

Ages 17, If she has a problem she should really sort it out herself.

ilovesooty Sun 27-Nov-16 20:32:29

In the toilets at my local shopping centre there are notices indicating that both toilets can be checked by both men and women.
I don't see why you'd be intervening with her employer either.

ShatnersBassoon Sun 27-Nov-16 20:33:27

If you're daughter's bothered, she should ask for a sign she can put on the door to say the toilet is not in use during cleaning.

usual Sun 27-Nov-16 20:33:46

Do not ring. If she's unhappy then she needs to bring it up with her boss.

Nottalotta Sun 27-Nov-16 20:34:27

No definitely don't phone. Can she use one of those ' cleaning in progress' signs to prop the door open?

I'd wonder why loo rolls need to ne changed in the course of a shift though, surely put full ones in at the start?

seriouslyclueless Sun 27-Nov-16 20:36:41

I suppose I was just feeling concerned for her as she said she did say to her boss and they never listen as are always so short staffed.
I did say a lot of places put a closed sign on to say they're being cleaned and is this an option, maybe she could ask her manager about this.
So definitely No, ok, probably didn't judge that one too well, I just feel she's really vulnerable but she's probably safe enough and I need to not be so PFB !!

M00nUnit Sun 27-Nov-16 20:36:51

I've worked in clubs and bars and never had to go into the men's toilets when the place was open! If anyone had asked me to I'd have refused. I really don't think you should phone her boss up on her behalf though - if she's old enough to have a job she's old enough to have the conversation herself.

Fairylea Sun 27-Nov-16 20:37:29

Don't ring. Social suicide. If she's old enough to work there she's old enough to fight her own battles.

Ideally they should probably get a male member of staff to check the men's toilets, but in my 20 years of bar and catering experience generally it's whosever is available and staffing is often short. I've had to check the men's toilets when I was the same sort of age in my first restaurant job and ever since to be honest. It's pretty standard!

SawdustInMyHair Sun 27-Nov-16 20:37:46

In the toilets at my local shopping centre there are notices indicating that both toilets can be checked by both men and women.

That's to warn the public who might be startled/uncomfortable, though. Nothing to do with the safety of staff.

Do NOT call her employer, but if she feels uncomfortable she should raise it. It's not as if she just doesn't want to clean the toilets because she's and being fussy. She is being put in a vulnerable position, and the employer has a duty of care, especially as she is under 18.

RebootYourEngine Sun 27-Nov-16 20:39:01

Im sorry but get a grip.

Does she really stand in the toilets waiting while people are peeing/pooing? Cant she stand outside or find something else to do until the toilets are free.

IAmNotACat Sun 27-Nov-16 20:39:40

I had to do this when I worked in a bar but we would knock and wait until empty then put up a closed sign while in there. It only took a couple of minutes.

microsnake Sun 27-Nov-16 20:39:50

if it's just to change loo rolls can she not just go in when empty? I have to check ours at work and I shout to see if anyone is in there. Would wait then dart in when empty.

seriouslyclueless Sun 27-Nov-16 20:40:38

"Reboot your engine" she said she goes in and if someone comes in she just has to carry on while they pee or she's had to wait til they come out of the stalls.

pipsqueak25 Sun 27-Nov-16 20:40:39

op you sound lovely and caring but to phone her boss ? that is a def. no no.

RebootYourEngine Sun 27-Nov-16 20:40:56

What makes her vulnerable? Is it her age or that she is female?

Inthenick Sun 27-Nov-16 20:41:03

I think you are overreacting.

Marmalade85 Sun 27-Nov-16 20:42:51

Do not call her boss. If she has a problem she needs to speak to her manager.

Topseyt Sun 27-Nov-16 20:44:40

It is part of the job. She can't really pick and choose.

I wouldn't intervene at all.

bevelino Sun 27-Nov-16 20:48:08

OP what you describe is highly inappropriate, could you imagine the outrage if it were the other way round and a male employee was inspecting the ladies toilets while women were using the facility?

It is only legal for a male worker to enter female facilities, or a female worker to enter male facilities if existing users are given a chance to leave the facility beforehand. Most employers would place a notice for all to see advising that the toilets are checked by both male and female staff.

I would not complain on your dd's behalf but she should raise it with her employer if she is unhappy as they know full well what the rules are.

littleme2016 Sun 27-Nov-16 20:49:16

If she has an issue then she needs to speak to a manager herself.

Never worked in bar/restaurant/cleaning myself but I know the cleaners in our office will knock/shout "hello", wait for the toilets to empty and then put a "closed for cleaning" sign up. Surely your DD could do something similar or ask manager about the process that should be followed?

seriouslyclueless Sun 27-Nov-16 20:55:30

Thanks for replay and yep bevelino it doesn't feel right. DD says she had to knock really loudly then if no one is in she goes in to do her checks and then quite often a man will come and she explains that she is doing her checks and if they wait she will only be a minute and she says they never wait and say they will only be a minute and start to pee so she goes into cubicle so she can wait til they finish and then she leaves.
We've agreed I won't phone but she's going to speak "again" to a manager tomorrow about how she feels uncomfortable and could she put a sign up for the couple of minutes she will be in for.

harderandharder2breathe Sun 27-Nov-16 20:55:32

Yabu do NOT call her employer!

I worked st a camp in the summer and when I had to check the gents I would generally ask a passing male to stand outside while I did but that would be inappropriate when she's being paid and they're customers (at camp everyone was volunteer, :different set of expectations).

I also learned that if you close the ladies toilets they stayed closed but if you closed the gents they miraculously got opened again! Like duct tape peeled off the lock, locks picked opened!

If she doesn't feel safe she should speak up to her employer but I wouldn't be surprised if they took no notice

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