To ask my GP service not to give me the same doctor again?(20 Posts)
I've seen the doctor twice and suffer from extreme health anxiety and the first time I went I was crying and he brushed me off and rolled his eyes, and was getting visibly annoyed and I even kinda said mid tears " I can see you're getting annoyed" and he said yes, I told him not to tell me my pulse it gets high at the doctors but as long as you don't tell me I'm fine, well he did and I've been suffering for the last 3-4 weeks checking my pulse sometimes only once a day and sometimes 50+ times a day which isn't as bad as when the anxiety was at it's worst over 200 times a day.
But yes he kinda brushed off my concerns, looked exasperated and pissed off, it just made me feel like crap, stupid etc. Then today I had an appointment for an intimate issue and the same doctor and again whilst explaining to him he did an eye roll not this again. Inspected the area and it was fine but then asked me if I had had sex before I said no and although intimate it had nothing to do with sex and he looked a mixture of bemused and amazed. I am mid 20s but health anxiety and other circumstances just mean relationships etc aren't on my priorities and I want my first time to be in a relationship.
So yes AIBU to ask the receptionist next time I book an appointment to ask not to book me in with that doctor? there are about 5 at the surgery
YANBU. I sometimes ask for one doctor in particular, and other times "anyone but Dr so-and-so". It's fine.
If you need to book in again I would ask the receptionist which Dr you're booked in with and if it's that one, just ask if you can see someone else. Or ask to see a female Dr, then you're guaranteed not to get him. I have done this before and yes it is awkward, but I definitely did not want to see my rude Dr again and she was nowhere near as bad as yours
Yanbu to ask for another doctor. Commenting on your sex life or lack of is unprofessional unless relevant (e.g. Ruling out sti, pregnancy, reviewing contraception etc) but I do think you need to address your anxiety as you're likely to be told "you're fine" by them sometimes to,
Of course YANBU. He sounds awful and very unsympathetic!
YADNBU. It's quite common for receptionists to hear, "Not Dr X, please". In fact at some surgeries they ask if there's any particular doctor you'd like to see. Good luck!
I had the same comments
Thankfully i saw another doctor who saw i was ill and didn't treat me like crap.
Unfortunately op it seems this is not uncommon.
My old surgery knew not to book me in with a certain gp.
Really sorry you were treated this way. It's not right.
Thanks for the reassuring messages, I've never considered it as a possibility as it seems like you're designated from one doctor to another I had a really good and understanding doctor when my health anxiety first started and it really helped and since he moved on when I've had appointments I've seen doctors in blocks but he's the first that I've actually felt worst mentally for going to. And after the secretary/ receptionist thread and other threads it got me wondering if I was BU
YANBU. I always ask for a female one nowadays. It's quite normal to request a specific dr. Please don't be put off, keep trying until you find one who treats you decently.
I think you should actually say, "Not Dr X" because if enough people do that, action might be taken.
YANBU. I'd also explain that he was annoyed and exasperated with you. Thats not professional.
I had PTSD for a decade. I expect I was really annoying to everyone else around me but they were nice enough to let me get on with dealing with it and not let me know.
You will get throught this and come out the other side. The less of a fuss other people make about it, the easier it is IMO.
YANBU to ask for a specific doctor - I do that for various reasons. YABU to assume that the Dr is interested in your sex life - he has to ask the question if the problem is in the vaginal area. He said nothing but you saw a look across his face??? He did not comment. (I would guess that in your anxiety you attribute something that was not there.) He is human. He had a look on his face.
Unfortunately doctors are very busy and have many more patients to see than they ever have time for and if he came across as brusque because you were anxious about nothing , whilst he should have treated the anxiety, there really wasn't much he could do for a non-existent problem.
So switch doctors - and I hope you find one that you are happy with - and I hope that you get treated for your anxiety.
YANBU. I once went to see a GP being I was feeling very down and when I told him why he said "well, we've all got problems". I was younger and quite vulnerable at the time and I didn't pursue it nor seek any more help for my problems at the time.
I inadvertently saw him again on a same-day appointment for chronic nerve pain (an ongoing saga including hospitalisation, different types of physio etc) and I was in agony so went to GP and didn't know it was him I was seeing. Went in and told him what was going on and he just said "well what do you want me to do about it?" No attempts at any kind of examination. Just looked at me like I was insane.
I went down and told reception I wanted to see the manager who took me in to a room, logged my complaint and said it would be raised at the next surgery meeting. I then went in to see another Dr (straight after meeting with her) and he was a lot more responsive (actually examined me, arranged another physio referral, prescription etc).
You don't have to really even give a reason why you don't want to see a particular Dr. You can just say "no, I want to see another Dr please".
Bad I don't think he was interested in my sex life necessarily but it's kinda like i was going on there to see if a cut had been infected near but not around that area that I'd already stated how I got it or something surgical that I wanted to make sure was ok not what I went to the dr for but I told him the issue and it really had nothing to do with sex. And these were his words " what about when you've had sex ?" " I haven't had sex" " you haven't had sex" " no I haven't had sex " " no sex at all?" " no I'm a virgin I haven't had sex" " why haven't you had sex?" " because of my health anxiety I barely leave the house" and his face did change. It's just the kind of thing that needed checking but in no way had anything to do with sex.
And he did the eye roll before he checked so wouldn't have known whether it was nothing IYSWIM. I've no doubts about him being a good doctor but for me his demeanour makes my anxiety worse
I would request not to see him specifically. One of the GPs at my surgery has really poor interpersonal skills and I wouldn't want to see him for anything remotely mental-health related. Yours sounds even worse.
Yes, you can ask not to see a certain Dr if there is more than one at the practice. He doesn't sound like bedside manner is his strong point.
We have a nurse at our surgery who I refuse to see as she is rude and dismissive. If I need an appointment I always say I don't want her and it's never been an issue.
YANBU. There are loads of these type of GPs at my Drs surgery. I usually tell the receptionist who I want to see.
Incidentally, I saw one yesterday with my five year old. It wasn't an emergency appointment and I was told by the receptionist that the appointment would be for the ten minutes allocated.
Honestly? We were in there for around three minutes. The Dr was unbelievably rude and barely even acknowledged my Son. She never asked any questions, didn't even examine him. I left feeling furious.
I am still cross that I foolishly never checked which GP we were seeing when I made the appointment.
Lesson learned. Again.
YADNBU. It's disgraceful that GPs are like this.
I was back at the doctors asked not to be seen by that doctor and came out feeling checked and help regarding my issues with counselling
There's one GP in our practice I refuse to let me or the kids see. She put us through hell and accused me of defrauding the NHS because I didn't want to pay out for a can of Cow and Gate over DD2 needing prescription formula on the say-so of the dietician for a food allergy.
Surgery have no issues giving me an appointment with another GP in the practice - either me asking for a specific one (I tend to make a point of going to one consistently for my mental health) or just "anyone but X" for other stuff. Mind you our surgery is quite geared up to telling you that "Dr X is really into dermatology stuff" "Dr Y's real interest is something else" and "Dr Z is absolutely fascinated by sperm so go to him for all things testicle related".
Dr Z incidentally is scarily fascinated by sperm - his eyes light up and he becomes all overenthusiastic about the wonder of them when you discuss the subject!
Join the discussion
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.Register now
Already registered with Mumsnet? Log in to leave your comment or alternatively, sign in with Facebook or Google.
Please login first.