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AIBU?

To go with my gut feeling.

16 replies

HorridHenrietta2 · 15/11/2016 20:25

So, that time when I'm busy choosing schools for my ds4.
We have visited 3 lovely schools... One of which was the front runner all along.
Until, that is, I visited it.
The thing is, there was nothing massively wrong with it, it's an outstanding school with very good results but, I just get a sinking feeling that I can't properly explain when I think about him going there.
I feel fine about him going to either of the other two.
My question is, is it unreasonable to listen to my gut, even when it's not backed up by any logical facts?
Dp likes it and still wants it as first choice.

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ThomasRichard · 15/11/2016 20:26

What does your DS think?

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Hastalapasta · 15/11/2016 20:27

Go with your gut, if you and he will be happy.

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HorridHenrietta2 · 15/11/2016 20:30

Thomas ds has only visited that one (the one I'm not comfortable with) initially he said it was rubbish and woke in the night crying not to go there (possibly where my gut feeling is coming from?) but now he's changed his mind and thinks going there would be fun.

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MsStricty · 15/11/2016 20:31

Gut. Every time.

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ToffeeForEveryone · 15/11/2016 20:34

Arrange a second visit and see if you still feel that way.

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StStrattersOfMN · 15/11/2016 20:36

Absolutely go with your gut feeling, it usually means you're picking up on something subliminally.

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Leeds2 · 15/11/2016 20:38

Go for a second visit. And if that is still how you feel, you need a serious discussion with DH!

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Haggisfish · 15/11/2016 20:39

Agree, go again not on an open day.

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Dropmealine · 15/11/2016 20:42

Where did your older boys go? Do you have experience of any of the schools first hand or via friends? I'm guessing if you have 4 dc you will know a lot of families who may be able to give you more info.

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MistyMinge · 15/11/2016 20:42

I'm having this with my DC1. We will be living near an outstanding school that everyone is desperate to get their child into and people rave about. I presumed DC would go there and felt lucky we lived within catchment. But when I looked round it didn't feel amazing, was quite cramped and I just didn't get that 'feeling' about it. Think we're going to opt for another but I keep feeling like we should go with the outstanding school as that's what everyone else would want to do in our position iyswim.

I think my gut is going to win.

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HorridHenrietta2 · 15/11/2016 20:52

Nice to know I'm not alone Misty!!
Sorry for the confusion, I meant ds aged 4 not my fourth ds!

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Haggisfish · 15/11/2016 21:04

I turned down a waiting list place that came free at our local outstanding school after dd had been in local primary for a term. Ime outstanding schools can sometimes be coasting schools in very middle class areas that just don't really do much for students or parents.

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Muddlingalongalone · 15/11/2016 21:08

I went with gut feel & 4 terms in I'm so pleased with the choice although I did go round in agonising circles before & after submission & even the day before was half hoping I'd get my second choice.
Depends what the differences are between the schools but try to figure out what will suit your child the best & what is important to you.
It sounds utterly ridiculous writing it down but I ruled out 1 school because although it was new & despite the amazing facilities I felt that only having 40 children in the whole school older than her would not be good for my slightly bossy, likes her own way child & ruled out another because I wasn't keen on room for breakfast & After-school club & no one had a good word to say about junior school (and not allowed to look round)
Why not go to the park in the school hols & talk to the parents of school age over the holidays & get the lowdown.

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Areyoufree · 15/11/2016 21:12

Just be sure that your gut feeling isn't something to do with you, rather than the school. For example, maybe something about it reminds you of your school, or somewhere with bad associations.

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Rainydayspending · 15/11/2016 21:12

Outstanding is just from ofsted and their summaries are hardly comprehensive or accurate (mostly looks and stats over substance every time). Go with your gut.

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Haggisfish · 15/11/2016 22:07

Although, actually, if it's an ofsted from the last 18 months or so, I'd be more inclined to let it sway me. Ofsted have had a massive overhaul for the better recently in terms of their inspections.

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