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AIBU?

To ask how old your children were when you allowed candy?

165 replies

jayisforjessica · 02/11/2016 23:17

I am aware that I already have a twelve year old DS and I made my choices with him. I now have twins on the way and I'm going to be raising them in a world that is twelve years on from the world in which I raised DS1. I'm curious about sweets, fizzy drinks and the like. How old were your DC when you allowed them?

I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place here - if I say what choices I made for DS1, that'll get accused of being performance parenting, and if I decline to say but answer the inevitable question later, it'll get accused of being a drip feed, so I'm aware of the awkwardness of this post!! Just know that I'm holding off on saying so I can get some genuine answers rather than knee-jerk "ooh, performance parenting thread" comments :) Haha.

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spicyfajitas · 02/11/2016 23:19

First kid about three. 2nd, 11 months, third, whenever they first grabbed it off their siblings

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Cakescakescakes · 02/11/2016 23:21

Oldest child is nearly 6 and has had occasional chocolate or biscuit since about 1yr old. Has never had fizzy drinks and has tasted haribos, crisps etc over the past year or so but doesn't like them so doesn't have them.

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WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeG0es · 02/11/2016 23:21

Can't remember, it just wasn't a big thing.

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messystressy · 02/11/2016 23:22

I'm quite strict. My kids are 6 and 4 and probably tasted their first sweets this year. They're only allowed them at parties, along with crisps. I’m not outlawing them but want to make it clear they're only for certain occasions. No fizzy drinks, ever, no McDonalds. Realise this will probably backfire on me!

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ollieplimsoles · 02/11/2016 23:22

What the hell is performance parenting?

DD is a year old and so far she has had a lick of ice cream, a small piece of her own birthday cake, and a some Cadburys flake that accidentally fell into her lap.
She does have baby biscuits and i give her honey now occasionally.

We are holding off for as long as possible really. Family members are queing up to give her shit food and I'm having none of it.

I wouldn't want her to have fizzy drinks at all really.

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messystressy · 02/11/2016 23:23

But they do have cake or chocolate as a treat a couple of times a week.

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GruffaloPants · 02/11/2016 23:23

DD1 is 5. We allowed chocolate from age about 2 or 3. Sweets more recently after she started getting them at parties etc. She doesn't like fizzy drinks yet, and will refuse fizzy drinks in favour of water (pure luck)!

I was only very occasionally allowed anything sweet as a child. We didn't even have biscuits. As a result I became obsessed with chocolate and sweets and still probably eat too much. I'm taking a relaxed approach to what my DDs eat and drink as a result.

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Balletgirlmum · 02/11/2016 23:24

I can't remember but it was when I was reasonably happy they were not going to choke on sweets.

DS is 13 & still dislikes fizzy drinks. Dd had them from when she went to parties etc without me staying. I don't drink fizzy drinks so it didn't occur to me to buy them.

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user1472334322 · 02/11/2016 23:24

Ds2 was younger than ds1 but can't remember exactly when. Neither have had fizzy drinks yet and won't for a long time yet! They're 5 and 2 now. Also not happy about chewing gum so they've not tried that either. Prefer ds2 doesn't have really chewy sweets but he has haribo. Ds1 eats most sweets.

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ollieplimsoles · 02/11/2016 23:25

As a result I became obsessed with chocolate and sweets and still probably eat too much

This is me too- as soon as I got my own money I spent it on crap and piled weight on in my teens. I would rather dd made her own choices and not restrict anything but that can start when she's a bit older.

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jayisforjessica · 02/11/2016 23:25

Performance parenting: a post that pretends to ask a question but is really all about showing off the OP's wonderful parenting lol.

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BillSykesDog · 02/11/2016 23:27

DS is 4. He had sweets at 2. He has had an occasional sip (about once a month) of fizzy drinks since he was 4.5.

My personal belief is that you should teach children to have everything in moderation and that forbidding things does more harm than good because the forbidden is more attractive. Plus I think it encourages a healthier relationship with food than encouraging guilt for eating something 'naughty'.

But that's my own opinion and what other people choose to do with their kids is up to them.

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ollieplimsoles · 02/11/2016 23:28

Oh right I didn't know that,

Ok op out with it, what did you do with your 12 yr old ds??

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ollieplimsoles · 02/11/2016 23:30

Congratulations on your twins too Flowers

I think a relaxed approach is good, especially if you have a lot on your plate.

I'm doing it to piss mil off really, and stop her trying to control yet another situation, shes obsessed with giving dd her 'first chocolate bar' and we keep saying no.

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Jellybean83 · 02/11/2016 23:32

He was probably around 3 when he first got sweets, like chocolates, cake etc.. mainly when birthday parties started happening. He was never really into crisps, it's only really now he's started asking for them (he's 7). He's never tried fizzy drinks and very rarely drinks juice, only ever milk or water. That wasn't a conscious effort on our part, it's purely because we never have juice in the house because DP lives on coffee and I only drink water, so his only choices have only ever been milk or water.

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BackforGood · 02/11/2016 23:34

pfb was a lot older than dc2 or dc 3 Grin

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TheNoodlesIncident · 02/11/2016 23:40

I told ds's HT that he didn't like sweets and didn't eat them, she looked like Hmm but it was true. Same with fizzy drinks, he just doesn't like them.

Mind you, he likes some sweets now (he's 8). He doesn't have very many though, and tends to forget he has them (from a party bag for example). Then DH and I eat them

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jayisforjessica · 02/11/2016 23:44

Sigh. I told DS1 that raisins were lollies, and so he got raisins as treats until he was about five (and started school). He never asked for lollies, haha. Similarly, until he was about I only offered milk and water on a regular basis, and juice (apple, orange, blackcurrant) were offered only on special occasions.

It was possible because I didn't have any older DC around to contradict what I was saying! My DT are going to have an older brother who knows all too well that raisins aren't lollies.

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Dontneedausername · 02/11/2016 23:55

From a young age, probably before a year!
And DD fed DS choc buttons before he was even weaned!
My daughter has a real sweet tooth at 5, loves sweets and choc and my son eats his weight in fruit and veg every day... didn't really do anything different with them.

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BlueFolly · 02/11/2016 23:56

About 9 months.

You talk like it's all or nothing OP.

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steff13 · 02/11/2016 23:56

We have three, ages 17, 15, and 6. Their first "sweets" were a cupcake on each of their first birthdays. No candy or juice until they were about 3. Soda we still limit. We don't buy it, so it's never in the house. They can have it when we're eating out, or at a friend's house. The 6-year-old is allowed caffeine free soda only. Although, she will sneak and drink my coffee if I leave it unattended. Hmm

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pregnantat50 · 02/11/2016 23:57

my parents saw a programme on tooth decay and gave my sister and me extra pocket money if we didnt eat sweets....well I am ashamed to say I spent the money on sweets...so forbidden fruit and all that. They would have been better letting us have a little bit now and then but it seemed all the more desirable as we werent allowed any.

my own children had sweets from about 5

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brandyandsummergloves · 03/11/2016 00:00

Candy? Are you in the US op?

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Sgtmajormummy · 03/11/2016 00:08

DS (18) has a sort of "smash and grab" attitude about sweets. They're bought so rarely that he just has to eat them straight away! Haribo and Chupa Chups started their aggressive advertising when he was about 6.
Until then it was just the odd fruit jelly from about 3.
DD couldn't care less. Her Christmas sweets are still around at Easter.

CHOCOLATE is a completely different matter, though!

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ProudBadMum · 03/11/2016 00:09

Can't even remember when mine first had sweets. Probably was white choclate once he was weaned maybe. Has them wherever now and he's 7. He isn't keen on sweets but will eat kinder eggs all day every day

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