To be annoyed with MIL

(11 Posts)
Mother86 Wed 02-Nov-16 19:06:37

Ok so I usually put loads of thought into Christmas and birthday presents and last year my hubby did his mum a really brilliant birthday present (birthdays are important to me loads more than Christmas but apparently this is the opposite with in laws even though they're not religious and my family are) and we got her a couple of small but thoughtful Christmas presents and then she got really upset (after we left) about how little we'd spent on her (FIL phoned up DH to 'tell him off') I was beyond fuming, we'd put loads of thought into those gifts and we were struggling last year for money.
A big birthday of mine was this year and I got random thoughtless bits of nonsense, stuff I wouldn't ever buy, she's never seen me with before and I didn't want and DH says I was being ungrateful (I wouldn't ever do that to mil face but had a moan to DH in private) and normally I'd just be thankful and leave it but after her joke of a reaction last year I'm very unwilling to bother with her presents, now it's nearing Christmas I'm feeling rather miserable about it again and I've told DH that he can sort MIL present this year.

Astro55 Wed 02-Nov-16 19:10:07

Best way! Leave him to it! His family - his choice

pictish Wed 02-Nov-16 19:12:02

Agree with letting your dh buy his mum's present.

Slightlyperturbedowlagain Wed 02-Nov-16 19:12:14

We each do our own family. Saves a whole load of hassle.

DixieWishbone Wed 02-Nov-16 19:13:55

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bruce02 Wed 02-Nov-16 19:14:40

Me and dh have always sorted our own family. It's just easier.

gillybeanz Wed 02-Nov-16 19:17:36

I'd be fuming that dh didn't ring her and say the same that fil said. he should call and bloody tell them off.

Yes, he should be buying his own mothers presents, it's not your responsibility.

Wolpertinger Wed 02-Nov-16 19:19:04

We do joint presents to our parents but I buy for mine and DH buys for his, if that makes sense. Saves on endless present buying and clamped down on MIL's expectations of me doing wifework in the early days- DH buys shit presents and we made sure she knew he'd bought hers wink

Ohdearducks Wed 02-Nov-16 19:19:35

It was very ungrateful, grabby and rude of her to complain about the cost of her gifts. She'd get fuck all from me this year.

ZigZagIntoTheBlue Wed 02-Nov-16 19:25:01

Yanbu, ultimate responsibility for all of dhs family lies with dh - apart from the nephews because dh is tight

Marshmallow92 Wed 02-Nov-16 19:30:15

How ungrateful of her! And them phoning up to complain would put me off buying anything again!! Sometimes you can't do right for doing wrong but I'd leave DH to sort her out this year, at least that way she can't hurt your feelings if she gets upset again!!

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