To discharge myself from this horrible, torturous place?

(208 Posts)
MaisieJ Mon 31-Oct-16 12:17:59

I am in hospital following an elective knee replacement. When I got back onto the ward the pain was pretty bad and I'd been told to buzz for painkillers so I did. auxiliary came in and said she'd let the nurse know. 30 minutes later no sign of nurse and pain is worse so I press buzzer again. Brash auxiliary came in and turned off the buzzer saying "I've already told her, constantly pressing your buzzer won't make her come any quicker!" 😲
At this point I also needed a wee but thanks to her attitude I didn't feel like I could ask her so thought I'd hold on for the nurse. 30 minutes later I'm busting to go so reluctantly pressed the buzzer. Same woman comes stomping back in 10 minutes later and snaps "is this about painkillers again?!" So I said no, I needed a bed pan. So off she strops, comes back in 10 minutes later and tries to drag me onto this horrible disgusting bedpan. Baring in mind I'd had no pain relief yet. I cried out and told her I couldn't do it so she said she'd go get help. 10 minutes later, no sign of her and I ended up pissing the bed. Mortified and I tears I tried to wipe myself best I could. Next minute she's back with another auxiliary, they fling my covers back rattling on about "getting on the bedpan" and realise my bed is soaked. The big horrible woman says loudly "you've already done it!!! Are you normally incontinent because if not, you shouldn't be incontinent in hospital either!" Basically making out that I'd done it on purpose.

Cut long story short they changed my sheets and I ended up drifting off to sleep. A while later I woke up, horrible taste in my mouth, I groggily reach for my glass of water and end up knocking it all over my bed. I called dh in tears saying my bed was wet and the auxiliaries were going to go ape at me. He insisted I press my buzzer and said he was making a complaint. I tried to clean it up myself but another patient saw and pressed her buzzer. Next minute I hear one of the auxiliaries say "she's gone and chucked water all over her bed now, well she can stay like that until I've finished with meals."

I eventually got clean sheets but I feel horrible. The auxiliaries have said stuff to the other women in the room like "when certain patients constantly demand attention it takes care away from those that genuinely need it". Now the other women in the room have started being funny with me too.
This morning I was woken up by a clattering trolley. Auxiliary said "what do you want for breakfast?". I said "I'll have a cup of coffee please" to which she rolled her eyes and snapped "im doing cereals! Not drinks! " I then heard her say to a student nurse "I swear I can't be doing with another day of her!"

What have I done???? I just want to go home whether I'm ready or not. DH is coming later so I'm considering asking him to just take me home with him. Bollocks to infection

Hirosleaftunnel Mon 31-Oct-16 12:21:27

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

yellowfrog Mon 31-Oct-16 12:22:03

Fecking hell, that's appalling! Get DH when he arrives to call PALS, make an immediate complaint and ask them what to do regarding your treatment right now.

educatingarti Mon 31-Oct-16 12:22:03

You need to ask to speak to the matron on duty and tell him/her what you have just posted. If you don't feel up to that, wait until your dh comes and get him to ask. You should not be being treated like this and the matron should sort it out.

ftmsoon Mon 31-Oct-16 12:22:19

Ask to speak to the nurse in charge and complain!!! If you don't feel up to , let DH rip someone a new one. Or fill in one their survey cards, they should be given to every patient. I'm sorry you're going through this, it's unacceptable.

yellowfrog Mon 31-Oct-16 12:22:34

Hirosleaftunnel - that's really not helpful!!

GiddyOnZackHunt Mon 31-Oct-16 12:22:46

Email what you've written here to PALS or get your DH to do so if you don't feel able.
I remember somebody else doing similar and things were resolved.

gwenneh Mon 31-Oct-16 12:23:08

Good lord, are you in North Middlesex? Because it sounds like my experience there!

Can you speak to PALS at all -- the basics of your needs are NOT being covered and they should be able to help. If you're feeling up to it, document EVERYTHING, and get names. I wrote a lot of letters after having a very similar experience in March and having dates, times, and most importantly names was very helpful in bringing this up with the trust directly.

IScreamYouScream Mon 31-Oct-16 12:24:14

You poor thing, I'm so sorry you are having such an awful time of it flowers. So, did that nurse ever materialise?

I doubt if it's the right thing to do, but I would be tempted to discharge myself. Could your DH have a word with a nicer nurse/sister when he visits, see if that would do any good? I'm sure there are some lovely but over-worked people on the ward who do not lack empathy like the one you have encountered. That woman needs a dressing down.

I hope you are feeling better soon x

Excited101 Mon 31-Oct-16 12:24:51

Appalling treatment. Do complain, avoid going home if there's a danger of infection or you'll end up in all manner of problems.

OnceMoreIntoTheBleach Mon 31-Oct-16 12:25:38

You poor thing. Yes the staff are busy and resources are stretched, but a decent attitude doesn't take any longer or cost any more.

I shudder at people like this whose job it is to provide care for others.

SauvignonBlanche Mon 31-Oct-16 12:26:05

Suck it up or pay to go private - Bollocks! No one should expect to be treated like that. angry

Ask to speak to the Ward manager and tell them what you've told us.

IScreamYouScream Mon 31-Oct-16 12:26:05

Hiro, why should she 'suck it up'. Most people I know have some basic empathy, which is all that would have been required. You should be able to expect that. It sounds like that woman doesn't, so why she finds herself working in a hospital I can't imagine.

LauLau93 Mon 31-Oct-16 12:27:33

You have done nothing wrong, unfortunately sometimes you do get those who are reluctant o be of any help regardless of whether it is there job! When i was in hospital after giving birth 6 weeks ago, although the nurses throughout the day were beyond amazibg and tried their best to keep checking in while i was havibg contractions, those during the night after having DD were nowhere near as nice. I had stitches so moving was so hard at first but i received no help all night. I'm afraid you just need to try your best to hold it together. Hopefully you have a more accommodating nurse tonight.

gwenneh Mon 31-Oct-16 12:27:55

Also if you do decide to discharge yourself, can you arrange for a nurse to visit to change dressings and for your physio at home? I know some private patients who have done just that. If you're not on an antibiotic drip, you might be able to get home and still minimize your risk of infection if you have some help coming in.

chowchowchow Mon 31-Oct-16 12:28:06

Oh I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. It's a shame as there are so many health professionals that are so caring and these witches give everyone a bad name.
I would also be tempted to discharge but being sensible it's probably not the best idea. The shifts must change soon?!! Get DH to stay with you as long as you can. Good luck flowersflowersflowers

bibbitybobbityyhat Mon 31-Oct-16 12:31:19

That is a disgusting reply Hirosleaftunnel. You troll.

JoolsSchmools Mon 31-Oct-16 12:34:28

Op ignore Hiros he/she is going round acting like a twat on lots of posts.
Definitely make a complaint to PALS when you feel up to it

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser Mon 31-Oct-16 12:34:41

Hiros what an awful thing to say!

OP I work in a hospital and I would be horrified if that was going on. Definitely put in a complaint. How many days post op are you now, and how is the recovery going? Are you on any IV meds? If things are going well and you were going to be discharged home (as opposed to some sort of rehab centre) I would be tempted to go home early.

Iwannabelikecommonpeople Mon 31-Oct-16 12:35:43

Horrendous bullying behaviour from the hospital staff and should not be tolerated, they have a duty of care that means respect for your wellbeing. Make notes and make sure a complaint is made, I wish you well in your recovery. flowers

Redken24 Mon 31-Oct-16 12:36:35

Speak to the ward manager - immediately.

mintthins Mon 31-Oct-16 12:37:05

flowers that really is not acceptable on any level at all.

Unicornsandrainbows3 Mon 31-Oct-16 12:40:24

You poor thing! utterly disgusting behaviour and needs reporting ASAP.

Mouthfulofquiz Mon 31-Oct-16 12:40:57

If you have your phone with you, can you call the hospital switchboard and ask to speak to the on call manager or the matron? Don't discharge yourself unless you are medically fit.

EveOnline2016 Mon 31-Oct-16 12:40:58

I work in a hospital, some people shouldn't work in a hospital.

Over an hour for pain relief after surgery is not on. As well as waiting for a bedpan over 1/2 hour also not on.

I know how stressful working on a busy ward, but I would never bitch about a patient not matter how many times the buzzer is pushed.

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