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AIBU?

To look forward to this phase of my life being over

26 replies

MrsMcAvoy · 26/10/2016 02:16

Currently up for the fourth time with my 8 month old DS. I love him more than life itself, but night feeds and mid-night playtimes were clearly created by the devil Grin

I know I shouldn't wish away these previous days, but I can't help but long for the day he eventually sleeps through!

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PenguinPoo4 · 26/10/2016 02:33

Totally normal! And don't worry about wishing the precious time away, I have a 4 year old, and so far there have been lovely and magical (and annoying and frustrating) parts to each stage! Its not as though they stop being cute when they reach 1 or anything.
I think all parents probably enjoy different stages more than others. Nothing wrong with that.

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oliversax · 26/10/2016 02:48

I found around 8 months hardest with DD1, the lack of sleep was killing me. I woke up every day looking forward to bedtime then felt guilty for wishing the time away. Hope your sleep improves soon. Lack of sleep is torture and makes the days hard work.

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Kstar8 · 26/10/2016 03:36

I'm crying because 8 week old has taken two hours to go back down. I don't know what I'm doing wrong but 4 hours max of unbroken sleep a night is just not sustainable Sad I know she's going to wake up in an hour to feed again and I'm now too stressed to sleep. People keep telling me to "cherish this time" are they kidding?!?

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Carrados · 26/10/2016 03:47

YANBU.

People who push how precious that time is in a sleep deprived parents' face are insensitive t sometimes. Not all of us cope well with lack of sleep & there's only so much cute that compensates for that.

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applepatch · 26/10/2016 03:51

I get really frustrated with the lack of sleep I'm getting sometimes Sad feel like I'm always waiting for the next wake up with my 5 month DD which seems to stop me drifting back off despite being shattered. I find myself wishing for the sleep/age to improve. Totally normal when so tired I think.

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AmberLav · 26/10/2016 03:51

Totally normal! I'm up with DC3, who is 10 months, and it's hard not to want to fast forward some bits... equally some bits you'll want to slow down, but the sleep deprivation, that's definitely a bit to speed up!

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MrsMcAvoy · 26/10/2016 08:25

My nieces mum keeps telling me how she slept through from being very young - how do some people even get this lucky?! I just shrug it off when people ask how my DS is sleeping and act like I'm not bothered that he's a terrible sleeper.

I think at this point the longest he has slept is a solid 4 hours, during which typically I couldn't sleep properly as I had one ear open waiting for him to wake up!

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MrsMcAvoy · 26/10/2016 08:26

Kstar I hope you got some sleep eventually!

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QuiteLikely5 · 26/10/2016 08:28

You poor thing. This too shall pass!

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Kstar8 · 26/10/2016 08:52

Thanks Mrs. I managed 2 hours between 4-6 and then had another hour just now.
Hope you had a better night too!

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Kione · 26/10/2016 09:01

My DD is 7 and to me she still is the cutest thing. Pregnant again now and am already wanting the first weeks to go by quick Blush

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MrsMcAvoy · 26/10/2016 09:02

I got him back to sleep around 3.15 and then DH got up with him at 5. Dreading the clocks going back Confused

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marilynmonroe · 26/10/2016 09:06

I read a great article recently about how annoying it is when people say you shouldn't wish away the early years. Their life doesn't stop when they get older and those first few years are really hard work. Ime it gets better and better. They become more interesting and you can enjoy and learn stuff together! Mine are 8 and 6 and I'm loving this stage. There are hard parts though where they drive me mad but I'm looking forward to all the stages!

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joellevandyne · 26/10/2016 09:17

I don't miss a damn thing about the early years months.

Even healthy, non-colicky babies are, to me, mainly intensively needy, boring, frustrating, anxiety-inducing sleep-thieves with the redeeming feature of being cute. Seeing them make leaps in development can be quite magical. Wiping their bums is decidedly not, and that happens with a lot more frequency.

Now that my children are aged over two, talk, walk, at least attempt to manage their own toileting and best of all, sleep through the night, I love them just as fiercely as I always have, but now find them vastly more charming company, and a lot more manageable.

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waitingforsomething · 26/10/2016 09:23

Yanbu. I hated the first year of DDs life, she was difficult in just about every way although transformed into a gorgeous toddler and is now amazing at almost 4. I also wished away the first year of DS life too- he is now 15 months and although he's in a tantrumming phase I don't miss the first year one bit!!
So glad I've done it and can get on with enjoying my children as chiildren not babies.
Everyone's different, it's hard to cherish sleep deprivation.

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puglife15 · 26/10/2016 09:29

YANBU. I really want to enjoy dc2's early months, he's likely my last and I'm on mat leave, but the days fly by in a stress of crying, attempted naps, frantic tidying, dc1's constant questioning/chatting/whining and fuck all sleep. I'm lucky to get 4 hours a night still, never get 5 minutes off and feel permanently shit.

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Softkitty2 · 26/10/2016 09:31

I feel for you OP, i have a 7 month old, she's never slept through the night, I woke up atleast 5x last night. She also likes to wake up at around 2am to play. I am so tired. Flowers

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MrsJayy · 26/10/2016 09:39

Friend of mine used to say oh I love when she wakes up in the night it's our special time but she always had a slightly manic Grin when she said it poor woman had lost the plot with no sleep. Yanbu no sleep is torture

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Hassled · 26/10/2016 09:53

The older my DCs get (even the youngest is a teenager now) the less I miss the toddler/baby stage. I don't look back on it wistfully as a fun and joyful time at all - it was just really hard work and how the hell did I (or anyone) cope with the sleep deprivation? The only thing I'm nostalgic for is building wooden train tracks :o.

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formerbabe · 26/10/2016 10:00

My dc are school age now...I don't miss the baby and toddler stage. I saw a mum in the supermarket the other day with a tiny newborn in a sling and a toddler in a buggy and all I thought was "thank God it isn't me".

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MrsMcAvoy · 26/10/2016 10:13

Yes softkitty what is it with the 2am playtime?! I walk into his room and he's sat up wide awake giggling to himself! I know then that I'm going to be up for a good hour or so Sad

I completely agree joell they are pretty boring. DS is just starting to get a personality to him and is a bit more 'fun' to spend time with, but still I do spend most of my day thinking how bored I am, no matter how much activities I try to get in

And he has literally one 45 minute nap in the morning and a half an hour in the afternoon, so no chance of the 'sleep when the baby sleeps' that everyone loves to go on about

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MrsJayy · 26/10/2016 11:12

Dd1 stopped napping at 11 months me and dh used to take her in shifts. I used to go to bed at 8pm and he had her till 12 the girl is 23 and still she is a rubbish sleeper.
. Dd2 could sleep on a knife edge which would be a blessing but dd1 was then saying no tired mummy

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YoJesse · 26/10/2016 13:33

Urgh poor you! I remember it well. Ds would be awake for hours on end in the night so I'd end up with him and me on the sofa bed because I was so worried our neighbours (their bedroom backed onto ours) would here him crying. I don't think I slept for that time of my life.
It got better around 1ish I think.

Keep going Brew

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Ohyesiam · 26/10/2016 15:54

I really get you. Mine are almost tens now and I look back on the early days and suffer

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WilliamHerschel · 26/10/2016 16:08

I found the broken sleep more manageable when dd was a baby. Now she's a toddler who doesn't nap and still a bad sleeper at night, combined with tantrums and battles over every single thing, I just feel done in. I really would love 24 hours to be on my own.

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