To ask how long is too long to be doing online dating?

(11 Posts)
Ilovetomodell Sun 16-Oct-16 14:51:43

Been doing it for the best part of three years. In that time, I've had one short relationship, been on dates with 11 different men, and probably chatted to more than a hundred 😮

Now I like like an 'oldie' on the website, one of the familiar faces. Am thinking about giving it up, but that feels like giving up on meeting someone! Just wondered what everyone else did?!

WorraLiberty Sun 16-Oct-16 14:55:21

Online dating wasn't a thing when I was single.

But why would there ever be a time limit on it?

No-one puts a time limit on the more traditional types of dating, so if you enjoy it, why not continue forever or at least until you meet someone (if in fact you do)?

roasted Sun 16-Oct-16 14:57:37

Maybe time to try a different website? You may find some different people on a different website (although I would be surprised if you didn't bump into a few familiar faces).

RooDaisy Sun 16-Oct-16 14:58:36

Join the old dating thread in relationships, lots of people in the same boat and lots of useful advice and stories from people going through the same thing

CreepyClown Sun 16-Oct-16 16:30:43

Use a different site, doesnt matter how long you been on there though sounds like you are having fun

SpongeBobJudgeyPants Sun 16-Oct-16 16:34:04

I was on there about two years before I met DF. It was on and off tho. Sometimes I really couldn't be bothered with it and the numpties on there so I gave it a rest. It's a no's game. I 'chatted' with about a hundred blokes, some nicer than others, until I happened on DF.

FlabulousChic Sun 16-Oct-16 16:37:06

12 years ago I had three dates a week for a year never see any of them more than once. Met someone five years ago and see him for two years but discovered rather be single

VelvetSpoon Sun 16-Oct-16 16:37:51

It's important I think to take a break and detach from it regularly.

I was single for 5 years (during that time hundreds of messages exchanged, at least 50-60 first dates, a handful of second ones, and 2 not quite relationships which lasted a couple of months) and for 4 of those I was on dating sites. The longest continuous spell was about a year, that was shit, it just felt like groundhog day.

If you're fed up with it, have a break for a few weeks, take some new photos and try again when you feel ready. Oh, and maybe try a new site, though I used to find the same faces were on all of them!

myownprivateidaho Sun 16-Oct-16 17:29:19

11 men in three years is nothing! You need to meet far, far more people to make it work imo. You can't tell if you're going to get on from a profile or messaging. Don't piss around exchanging endless messages, arrange far more dates, like two a week. If it's not working after a year or so then you maybe need to wonder if you're doing something wrong. But definitely you can't tell after going on an average of less than 4 dates a year!

HappinessLivesHere Sun 16-Oct-16 20:09:19

11 in 3 years? Definitely need to be dating more than that if you're online dating. I was on and off over the course of 3.5 years including a 2 year relationship and 2 shorter term ones and dated another 11 men before meeting my DH. Definitely stick at it but maybe be more open to actually meeting people. Do the asking of you're not being asked!

Blankiefan Sun 16-Oct-16 20:27:01

I agree with PP, you should meet way more guys. Exchange a couple of emails to make sure you are comfortable then meet them.

I used to do coffee on Saturday/Sunday mornings/afternoons as a first date. Sometimes I'd line up 3 in one weekend. It's totally a numbers game - you can tell so little that's real from emails. Meet them and churn they the numbers.

I probably went on second dates with about a quarter of first dates and more with about half of those.

Good luck.

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