To fucking HATE Christmas?!

(82 Posts)
BasinHaircut Tue 11-Oct-16 14:27:36

It's only October and it's already a massive ball ache.

I'm not religious in any way and so in that sense it has little meaning to me.

It's such a palaver, expensive, too much fuss, all just utter bollocks.

My 3yo will be great fun this year as he understands santa etc, so I was looking forward to it in that respect, but it appears that I may be expected to accommodate wider family members who are terrible guests, when I was hoping it could just be me, DH and DS this year. Last year I did 4 days of entertaining on the trot and no fucker invited me anywhere.

Is there a hole I can hide in between now and Jan 2nd??

KungFuPandaWorksOut Tue 11-Oct-16 14:29:13

Say no visitors welcome unless it's a plump fellow who wears a red suit and comes down the chimney! But you are more than happy too go to their house wink

Dadstheworld Tue 11-Oct-16 14:31:24

That's not really the fault of Christmas is it?

jimijack Tue 11-Oct-16 14:31:25

Over here, come into my hidehole, it is shite, I too Fecking hate it.
My 3 year old will love it, but there's no way on this green earth I'm entertaining anyone but my dh& kids.
They can all fuck off, it's a definite NO.

Dh does all the donkey work, I never do it.

SheldonsSpot Tue 11-Oct-16 14:31:42

Well wider family members can 'expect' to be accommodated as much as they like, but it's you that has the final say. That part of Christmas is very much in your control.

ShowMeTheElf Tue 11-Oct-16 14:34:31

YABU. It's what you make it.
If you don't want it to be a ball ache don't let it be.

FlameGrower Tue 11-Oct-16 14:37:28

It's not Crimbo's fault. It's your fault for being a sucker.

tofutti Tue 11-Oct-16 14:38:47

That's not really the fault of Christmas is it?

That's not really the point.

user1476140278 Tue 11-Oct-16 14:38:56

I agree with just not giving in to expectation. We had a bit of that...people hinting etc...people who have their OWN households and families so can do it all themselves!

sonlypuppyfat Tue 11-Oct-16 14:38:56

Mum is that you?

CigarsofthePharoahs Tue 11-Oct-16 14:39:55

So don't.
That's my plan. Last year we travelled, I did all the cooking and worked my ass off. What did I get in return? Nothing but bloody criticism, that's what.
So I've decided that the whole lot of them can sod off this year. We're having Christmas at home and no whinging rellies allowed. They can all go stuff their own bloody turkeys.
I'm actually looking forward to it!
Make your plan, stick to it. You will be guilt tripped, but if you expect it and you see it coming, it's easier to dodge.

StrawberrytallCake Tue 11-Oct-16 14:40:39

grin At the title, and the last poster's name being Showmetheelf

Don't invite family if you don't want to! We only have the ones we like for long periods of time. If you don't like doing entertaining and you still have to see them - meet them somewhere out of the house so you can go home and have some peace!

You won't hate it when you see how excited your 3yo will be smile

BasinHaircut Tue 11-Oct-16 14:40:43

kungfoo I don't want to go out though! I want to play with DS, in my Pjs and not cook a dinner.

jimi I'm there! I'll bring crisps.

sheldon its more others not taking their turn in hosting the grandparents and always doing whatever they please that is impacting on me as I'd never let them spend it on their own as they would be devastated.

elf, if it was up to me I'd make it CANCELLED!!! grin

ShatnersWig Tue 11-Oct-16 14:40:47

I used to love Christmas. Then a good friend died on Christmas Eve. That Christmas was obviously obliterated and the next few were quite hard. Even now get very melancholy about it as a result.

I think Christmas can be lovely if you have a big or close family and/or you're not single.

This will be my sixth Christmas on my own. I work Christmas Eve. I shall see my parents Christmas Day morning through until about 3 pm after lunch then I shall go home to my flat and spend the rest of the day on my own. My parents and I get on but we're not overly close and they will just spend the day watching TV in silence so I may as well go home. Work is shut until after New Year and, one night aside, I shall probably won't see or speak to anyone until I go back to work. All my friends are coupled, so they spend Christmas with their families and kids, go back to work pretty quickly, or go away.

The one thing I did like about Christmas Day was that I would spend several hours with my nan, who was just fabulous and at least made the day bearable. We used to sit together and put the world to rights. She died this summer, having starved herself to death after two minor strokes and deciding she'd had enough. It broke my heart, despite being a 42-year old man, and I know this Christmas is going to be a huge struggle to get through.

BasinHaircut Tue 11-Oct-16 14:42:36

sonly, not unless you are a 3yo boy!!!

helpimitchy Tue 11-Oct-16 14:43:28

Just take the pressure off yourself. No visitors, relax, watch tv, eat treats and make a modest roast dinner. Heck, stay in your pyjamas if you want grin

Once you stop making a big effort and just chill out, it's not so bad.

BasinHaircut Tue 11-Oct-16 14:44:53

Shatners flowers

BarbaraofSeville Tue 11-Oct-16 14:45:25

Put your foot down and do Christmas your way. Only do the cooking, hosting and visiting that you actually want to do.

Only buy presents for your DCs and DP/H. Other adults don't need presents. If you must buy things then token wine, chocs etc is fine.

Do things as a family that are fun for you like panto, or winter wonderland walks etc.

Don't let yourself get sucked into 4 days of entertainment that's madness.

If you want to see these people you could say 'we could come to you this year'.

OurBlanche Tue 11-Oct-16 14:52:14

Why isn't it up to you?

Who is it up to?

Are they going to be doing the cleaning, cooking and hosting?

If not, tell them to fuck off too!

It is only difficult the first time.. and if you are the last to say no! Your other family members have got the hang of it... now it is your turn. Or you could carry on being a martyr to it.

Have the grandparents said they would be devastated? You might be surprised!

SapphireStrange Tue 11-Oct-16 14:57:15

They can expect away, OP; you don't have to comply!

And YANBU. I hate it. The fuss. The baggage. DP and I sometimes go away; might do that again this year, although it's not a cost we can hugely afford.

CoughingForWeeks Tue 11-Oct-16 14:59:21

I hate it too, but more because of the months of build up for what is effectively ONE DAY of enforced jollity, preceded by weeks of stressing out about what to buy people. I do like the parties though. And the Doctor Who special.

MargotLovedTom Tue 11-Oct-16 14:59:32

When you say hosting the grandparents, do you mean your GPs or your son's (ie. your parents)? Just invite whoever the fuck you want. You said "it would appear" so there have obviously been hints etc. Either completely ignore them, or say "I'm not having a big thing like last year, it was bloody knackering, and invite the GPs and the GPs only, if you think they'd be left on their own otherwise. .

Branleuse Tue 11-Oct-16 14:59:50

I usually hate xmas, but last year I took a real step back and made it much more low key. Had it just us immediate family and it was actually quite good fun. Its just a roast dinner and some presents

Sunshineonacloudyday Tue 11-Oct-16 15:01:30

I don't want to go out though! I want to play with DS, in my Pjs and not cook a dinner.

Cook dinner for your dh and ds. You should see my kitchen on christmas day the amount of food that is cooked and it was only 5 of us (now 6). Know one would have guessed that shops opened on boxing day. The lead up to it is the most stressful time for me.

MariposaUno Tue 11-Oct-16 15:02:18

Only thing I hate about it is the seeing family part, not my own but the arranging of dc seeing her dad and staying at dgp over the season. I never go a Christmas without offending someone as they feel they are not priority but really its first come first serve and work with that.

I don't actually like receiving gifts even though I apreciate the thought behind them.

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