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AIBU?

Interpret this.

30 replies

TheHouseElf1 · 26/09/2016 18:19

So this is an excerpt from a text. I would say read between the lines but I don't think it's necessary.

"I spend large amounts of my life being kind just to be kind. It changed me as a person I think. I think the way you speak and interact (with me, the girls and the wider world) has become a habit and that has become the norm even though you can be kind when you consciously think about it."

So is it just me?

OP posts:
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VeryBitchyRestingFace · 26/09/2016 18:21

I'm afraid it lost me at the first sentence. Blush

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myownprivateidaho · 26/09/2016 18:21

Yes, they're saying you've got into the habit of being mean. Not a very kind text, all things considered.

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ImperialBlether · 26/09/2016 18:24

Yes they're saying they make sure they are kind all the time, whereas you (or whoever it's aimed at) doesn't, though can manage it if they try.

Is there any truth in it?

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mickeysminnie · 26/09/2016 18:24

Sorry can't find my mind reading glasses! What exactly are you asking?

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Mybeardeddragonjustdied2016 · 26/09/2016 18:24

Basically someone thinks your a bitch Shock

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DoreenLethal · 26/09/2016 18:24

You are a big meanie.

They are a saint.

How convenient for them.

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JenLindleyShitMom · 26/09/2016 18:26

Is this a text message text or a book text?

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Lovewineandchocs · 26/09/2016 18:26

I am betting it's your OH?

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Janey50 · 26/09/2016 18:27

Basically,saying you are mean,and they are lovely.

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Janey50 · 26/09/2016 18:27

Any truth in it though?!Smile

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iklboo · 26/09/2016 18:28

I'd be tempted to reply 'what do you want, a fucking biscuit?' but that would probably prove their point.

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TheVirginQueen · 26/09/2016 18:28

Sounds like they're really trying to phrase it very carefully. They're not trying to fall out, they're trying to make a point?

It doesn't sound like a dramatic text. Have you said some things hurt the sender?

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somekindofmother · 26/09/2016 18:30

I think they're saying that they have made an effort to always be nice and now it comes naturally to them. but u have got into the habit of being mean, but u can change that if u just try to be nice.

it's quite condescending.

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1potato2potato3potato4 · 26/09/2016 18:30

Sounds like the writer is saying the readers default position is hostile, not necessarily mean if it's true.

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VeryBitchyRestingFace · 26/09/2016 18:31

See, I had assumed - probably incorrectly - that OP wrote the text.

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Mrsemcgregor · 26/09/2016 18:33

I would guess it was written by OPs mother.... not sure what that says about my relationship with DM!!

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e1y1 · 26/09/2016 18:35

Yep.

It is saying that whomever this text is aimed at is not being a nice person. They're trying to word it carefully, but it's saying:

I am a saint (yay for me Grin), but (person text aimed at) has become so used to being less than kind, that it is now normal (and perhaps unawares), however (the person text aimed at) can be kind when they wish to be.

In short, whoever sent that text does not like the attitude of the receipient.

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GiddyOnZackHunt · 26/09/2016 18:38

OH saying they are kind but the OP has got into the habit of being unkind.

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wowfudge · 26/09/2016 18:39

Rather sanctimonious if you ask me. Being kind just to be kind - on the face of it they could be saying they lie in order to be kind, but the upshot is still the same; whoever 'you' is, is a cow.

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acasualobserver · 26/09/2016 18:39

you can be kind when you consciously think about it.

Not the most ringing of endorsements.

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AmeliaJack · 26/09/2016 18:39

I can't imagine putting that kind of feedback or sentiment in a text.

That's surely a face to face conversation.

Being snappy/sarky/shouty or grumpy can become a habit. I warn my children about it.

It all depends upon the circumstances but I'm not keen in statements which say "I'm wonderful but you have to try harder". They tend not to be very effective.

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Arfarfanarf · 26/09/2016 18:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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TheHouseElf1 · 26/09/2016 18:49

If true they should be able to back it up with examples of my unkindness when asked and not try to shut down the conversation.

OP posts:
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Arfarfanarf · 26/09/2016 18:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AmeliaJack · 26/09/2016 18:54

I agree this kind of feedback is most useful with examples.

It is good to get (constructive) feedback from our families but it needs to be useful not hectoring.

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