Especially the style you chose for a new born.
I chose attachment parenting for dd as my best friend did it for hers and lent me a cosleeping handbook. I liked the theory behind it and in any case it suited my circumstances as I was sharing a room with dd and was single. I did the whole cosleeping, bf on demand approach. I can't say I did much baby wearing though as I had an emergency cs and it was too painful to use a sling.
I found breast feeding really tough and boring and I sacrificed a lot to do it but I did it for 2 years as got used to it and wanted to forge a strong bond with dd.
Has it paid off? Hmmmm. The theory behind attachment parenting is that if your child forms a secure attachment with you then they will naturally gain confidence and independence early on. In fact dd is still very clingy, hates being baby sat, goes to sleep alone but still comes into my bed at 8 etc and is scared of the dark. I would go so far as to say that she has attachment issues.
This might be the result of me becoming quite shouty once dd became more defiant during the terrible twos. My mum was dying with cancer at the time and I had little head space to reinforce any sharing etiquette at play group (DD still hates to share.)
I am much more authoritarian now than I ever thought I would be as I have no time in my schedule to reason with dd over every single little detail. I'm much more 'because I said so' than I want to be and I have far less patient than I would like.
Basically I have lost my way as a parent and I have no idea if I was right doing the attachment parenting thing.
I am not a complete cow and I still give dd lots of love and hugs, I take her on lovely days out and let her play with her friends. I try to protect her. but at the same time I crave personal space and hate clinginess...agggrr!
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To ask why you chose a particular parenting style and if it has worked for you?
56 replies
malificent7 · 25/09/2016 22:15
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