So I'm an AIBU lurker. Not posted before except 1-2 comments. Posting now BC feeling quite upset really & keen for perspective.
So background... 1st baby, difficult delivery, ill afterwards, struggled with breastfeeding in terms of milk supply. Baby dropped 86th to 11th centiles. Eventually at 8 weeks went to breastfeeding clinic. Saw amazing MWs who advised on how to give formula tops ups to get my BFing back on track. Had mastitis 4 times but managed to feed till 10 months.
Baby no 2 will be 3 weeks today. Have been hospital in patient for > 50% of time since birth with complications for him & me, but essentially nothing serious/permanent wrong. Both doing well now at home.
I'm so delighted that despite a rocky postnatal course I've been BFing brilliantly. He had one formula top up when I had to leave him on ward for tests (no pump available in time). But otherwise all BFing.
We're home a few nights now. Hubby has been asking to give a bottle +++ since before
Baby born. I've explained umpteen times that given our fertility issues this might be our last chance to have a child. I really want to do it as naturally as possible. I've said in open to top/ups with EBM ideally, but would be ok with formula if baby not thriving or if problem with milk etc. But otherwise I want to BF if I can.
I've not had energy to deal with expressing yet but had collected a little extra leakage (sorry!) & to appease hubbie said if baby got hungry last night while I was getting ready for bed he could offer the bottle. It was only 20mls. I said I would be upstairs & ready to feed him when he was done. So last feed ended 2230hrs.
It's now 3.30am. I just woke up with really sore engorged boobs, top, sheets etc soaking from leaked milk (sorry again buyout washing machine is broken so in royally irritated about unecessarily laundry). He's just brought baby in for feed. I must have fallen asleep earlier. He's just admitted he's given 120mls formula 11-midnight. He reckons baby vomited a third of it (has been reflux anyway).
I am probably so in this right now as to be a bit OTT but I'm really so upset as to feel quite numb.'I don't know where to start to express to DH how Upset I am that he's ignored the BFing plan, made unilateral decision to do something like that.
If he'd just asked Id have explained again. Baby's weight perfect. I'm a bit tired but actually been better past 48hrs than any time since birth. Been in brilliant mood, had visitors. success of BFing has helped my recovery Inthink.
I'm open to formula if we need it having been there before, I know how hard it is for
Folk that want to BF but can't.
Why would he do this now though?
How do I express my upset without throttling him?
How do I get him to support me?
Be gentle. Sorry for rambling....
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Re DH giving formula?
114 replies
passremarkable · 25/09/2016 03:42
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