To Think If You Live in Calabria, Without a Job But Lots of Free Money - You Can Afford To Pay Child Support?

[JoffreyBaratheon]

Police told me to keep an eye on the ex's FB account, to get an idea of his movements, not long before he was found guilty of harassing me. We have two teenagers together who live with me and their stepdad. We struggle by on minimum wage. Ex has never paid a penny for the kids. He doesn't send them xmas or bday gifts.

And there are court orders in place from Family Courts saying he can have no direct contact - but he can mail them 6 times a year.

Recently Child 1 turned 16 and so I went to check the 'father''s FB in case he was threatening to turn up on our doorstep, now I assume the court order no longer applies to Son 1.

CSA (whatever they're called now) have had various tales as to why he owes me £0. One story being he was unemployed. Yet I saw other unemployed men at least paid £5 a week or something. He was told not to pay even that. Later, they claimed he was not in the system - neither paying taxes or claiming benefits. At this point he lived where he had always lived and was easily traceable in 3 seconds online.

I know he inherited a lot of money and before that was pretending he was 'ill' to get the old invalidity benefit.

He has a London flat - mortgage will be paid off by now. And when his mum died he will have got his share of a vast London house. So he has money.

Imagine how thrilled for him I was to see he is renting a villa in some rural part of Italy. Has been there months. Is living the life of Riley.

And yet, according to the powers that be - he does not exist, is not in the system and therefore never has paid a penny for the boys in 16 years.

So what can we do, as parents (men or women in this situation) to recover money retrospectively? If the government agency set up to do this won't bother to help us - anyone know of a law we could use, to start getting women (and men) in this situation a back payment?

Anyone know of a way to get some redress for my sons? Or anyway a whole load of us could somehow find a way to get justice for our kids? Working on the assumption the government has failed to help us do this.

[OhhBetty]

I'm so sorry I have nothing helpful to add but didn't want to read and run. What an utter cunt he is (and I hardly ever use that word!) Someone more wise will be along shortly!!

[Lonecatwithkitten]

CMS can only use income, so if he is living off inheritance it is not technically income. However, there is provision in the children's act if a parent has a large pile of cash to apply to the court for some to be released to support children. You will need a solicitor and it is likely to be drawn out and expensive.

[Dogcatred]

I presume you did not marry him? If you had you would have perhaps a 50% share in his UK property which would be a really big start to getting money (and he would in any property you own).

If you were married let us know.

If not then as lonec says you need a solicitor ideally and use the Children Act.

[HereIAm20]

I didn't think that the CMS can pursue absent parents abroad?

[JoffreyBaratheon]

Not sur ehow permanent the abroad is, as he has probably rented out his flat (he's done that in the past) and it's likely, I reckon, he is claiming benefits here as they'll go straight into a bank account..?

No, I didn't marry him. And I can't afford a solicitor. I was wondering if there was any redress as many people in my situation would also be left holding the babies, with zero income so not much chance of paying legal fees. I suppose that's where the law has protected the feckless parent - they know the ones left picking up the tab will also have no money to pursue it?

[traviata]

if you still have a child under 16 you can use the Children Act 1989 Schedule 1 and make an application, which could include a lump sum. It doesn't stop at age 16 but there are some very specific criteria after that, so you'd have to get your skates on.
Solicitor not required, but the legal fees could be a problem. Would you qualify for fee exemption on your incomes?

[traviata]

cut-off for fee exemption is £1735 pcm earnings if 2 children

[sashh]

No, I didn't marry him. And I can't afford a solicitor.

But your 16 year old might either through legal aid or on a no win no fee basis