To ask if men have 'Wendys'?

(117 Posts)
spamten Wed 14-Sep-16 19:30:07

I just wondered whether men have their own version of a 'Wendy'. I see on so many threads on MN things like "I think I'm being Wendied" - or "she sounds like a Wendy" etc etc. Do men have this phenomenon? If so, what is their 'Wendy' called ?
Would you be surprised if your OH came home one evening after a night out or whatever, and you asked him if he'd had a good day and he said "Not really, I think I'm being Garied" .

Does it seem funny to picture this scenario?

TattyDevine Wed 14-Sep-16 19:31:30

Absolutely no idea, please explain!

LifeInJeneral Wed 14-Sep-16 19:32:26

What the hell does a 'Wendy' mean?

Doublemint Wed 14-Sep-16 19:32:51

What is "bring wendied"?!? shows own mumsnet naivety

Doublemint Wed 14-Sep-16 19:33:13

*being! Not bring!

fastdaytears Wed 14-Sep-16 19:33:50

I have never heard this and I waste soooo much time on MN

TheWantedOne Wed 14-Sep-16 19:35:04

I actually lol-ed at 'being Garied'

acornsandnuts Wed 14-Sep-16 19:36:02

I doubt it. My DH has a massive amount of 'mates' with overlapping non commital friendships. I don't think he gets very deep with any of them, however they can be quite stroppy with each other in a teenage way. They're all in their 40s or 50s and group chats are sometimes hilarious at their childish tantrums.

TheWantedOne Wed 14-Sep-16 19:37:02

But no I don't think Wendys exist within men's friendships. I am often envious of how simple my DH's friendships are.

acornsandnuts Wed 14-Sep-16 19:37:06

Wendied - introduce a friend to a friend then they push you out in favour of each other's company.

MrsS1980 Wed 14-Sep-16 19:37:07

I think Wendy was someone who made friends with a pp, got into her friendship group and then isolated her from the group iirc.

LooseSeal Wed 14-Sep-16 19:37:46

Being Wendied is when you make a new friend, bring them into your friendship group then the new friend/Wendy turns your old friends against you so you end up on the fringes of the group or losing them all together.

oldlaundbooth Wed 14-Sep-16 19:38:25

I thought you meant the American burger chain!

Then I RTFT.

What does it mean?

spamten Wed 14-Sep-16 19:38:28

I hope a more experienced mumsnetter will be along in a minute to give a better explanation but if I understand correctly it's when your friends with someone and a new toxic 'friend' comes along and gradually takes over your well established friend, thereby displacing you.

lol TheWantedOne - it's one of those names that kind of lends itself to this scenario, doesn't it?

SoleBizzz Wed 14-Sep-16 19:43:27

Omg PMSL at Garied

Hilarious! !!!

arranged Wed 14-Sep-16 19:43:28

No, men don't wendy

ParisienneRose Wed 14-Sep-16 19:44:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Arfarfanarf Wed 14-Sep-16 19:52:05

I dont think so.
I think there simply isnt the same level of psychological game playing and position jockeying in male friendships.

I think theyre just more straightforward.

Like you? Let's have a beer.
Dont like you. Let's not.

I think there is a complexity and emotional dimension to female groups that is absent in male ones.

Greengager Wed 14-Sep-16 19:56:32

Think is was the original thread about 'Wendy' - a new friend the OP introduced to her friendship group only for Wendy to then set out to exclude her from it. www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2195040-Ive-been-wendied

AmeliaJack Wed 14-Sep-16 19:58:08

I certainly haven't observed it among my DH's friendship groups.

He's active in a particular sport and goes out to participate in it with several different groups. No one seems to mind and they are all very generous about inviting and absorbing new people into the groups.

TattyDevine Wed 14-Sep-16 19:59:29

Right, okay then! Been on here nearly 10 years but pleased to be enlightened.

Doublemint Wed 14-Sep-16 19:59:50

Thankyou wise mnetters!

TinklyLittleLaugh Wed 14-Sep-16 20:10:12

No I don't think so. DH has a couple of fairly relaxed friendship groups based around hobbies, and we have "couple" friends. His best mate is his brother but he's not bothered when his brother sees other mates.

DS(22) again has a couple of different friendship groups. Awkwardly his best mate (since he was about 12) really doesn't get on with his "clubbing" group, but he seems to juggle things quite well.

MyCatIsTryingToKillMe Wed 14-Sep-16 20:10:31

It certainly happens with teenage boys so don't see why not with men.

LookMoreCloselier Wed 14-Sep-16 20:10:34

No, but they do have 'Rod' on a popular (mostly mens) forum, Rod steals your girlfriend.

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