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AIBU?

To ask if you consider eating with your fork in the 'wrong' hand to be bad manners?

255 replies

Whatsername17 · 14/09/2016 18:42

Just that really. My right hand is my dominant hand, although for some tasks (like painting and cleaning) I tend to swap between my right and left hands. I eat with my fork in the right hand and knife in the left. Today someone was complaining that their kids eat the 'wrong way around' and that they were worried and felt it should be corrected. It made me feel a little self conscious tbh. Do people really care about which hand you have your fork in?

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acasualobserver · 14/09/2016 18:43

Good table manners are much more important than these absurd etiquette rules.

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EatDessertFirst · 14/09/2016 18:44

I eat the 'wrong' way round too. I've never had anyone say it was bad manners. I couldn't 'correct' it even if I wanted to.

Worry not.

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MrEBear · 14/09/2016 18:46

Should not be corrected any more than making a natural lefty write with their right.

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Whatsername17 · 14/09/2016 18:46

I couldn't either. It's just how I eat. I've had people before tell me it means I was 'supposed to be left handed'. I've just watched dd eat her dinner and she does the same.

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Bekksy · 14/09/2016 18:46

I think it's bs. It is along the same lines as saying left handed people write wrong!

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museumum · 14/09/2016 18:47

Left handers eat the other way round and it can cause issues at long tables with elbow room. I'd encourage a right handed child of mine to learn the right handed way from the start but not bat an eyelid about an adult or older child who always dies it the left handed way.

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Shannaratiger · 14/09/2016 18:47

Correctly in Britain:
fork goes in left hand knife in right
You only cut the piece of food you're about to eat
Never turn the fork and use it like a spoon.

However I think in America they cut all there food up at the start of the meal and then swap the fork to the right hand.

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NotYoda · 14/09/2016 18:48

I eat like this. DH takes the piss a bit because his grandparents were vv uptight about things like this. But I would not expect most people to notice.

The only bad table manners I judge is chewing with your mouth open

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SapphireSeptember · 14/09/2016 18:48

Nope, you eat whichever way you find comfortable. Bill Bryson said something about this in Notes from a Small Island, his mum used to tell him off for having his knife and fork the wrong way round, he came to the UK and said it was great that everyone ate the same way he did!

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QueenLizIII · 14/09/2016 18:49

I cant use a knife well with my left hand as I am right handed, so I have the knife in my right hand so I can cut properly.

Wouldnt notice or care if someone did it the other way.

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HatePaperDoll · 14/09/2016 18:52

I eat the 'wrong way round', despite being right handed. Never really had anyone comment on it that I can recall.

My mum did make a comment recently to about making sure I teach DD (aged 4) to eat the 'right way'. Oh, like you taught me Hmm was the response. She hasn't mentioned it again.

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iklboo · 14/09/2016 18:53

No. DH eats with his fork in his right hand. He says one of the reasons he knew I was 'the one' is because I said 'oh, do you eat with your cutlery the other way round', not 'the wrong way round' when we first went for a meal.

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sashh · 14/09/2016 18:53

I have a friend who does this, the thing I find 'bad' but only mildly annoying is that he doesn't cut his food, he 'holds' it with his knife and uses the fork to drag the food away from the knife.

I did ask him if he is cutting something like bread with just a knife which hand he used and he uses his right, it just seems odd.

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skyyequake · 14/09/2016 18:53

I did this and my family used to comment on it especially my nan (in a fond "why do you do that exactly?" way, not a snappy "don't do that at the table" way)
My uncle does it too Grin

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Seeyouontheotherside · 14/09/2016 18:54

It does annoy me a bit when people do it, especially in public but there are worse things you can do while eating like chewing with your mouth open, slurping drinkings..

Parents have a responsibility to teach their children to eat properly. Using their cutlery correctly is a part of that. It can be very important on a date or at dinner with a boss/client you're trying to impress. Unless they weren't taught table manners either, they will notice and it is offputting.

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Seeyouontheotherside · 14/09/2016 18:55

Drinks*

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PinkSquash · 14/09/2016 18:55

I'm an absurd person who can use and knife and fork in both hands, depending on comfort. It made feeding myself when the DC were little easy as I could juggle depending on their needs

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sonlypuppyfat · 14/09/2016 18:55

I eat with my fork in my right hand and all dcs eat like me

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Everytimeref · 14/09/2016 18:55

Dont think it mattes which hand knife and fork in but cant stand it if someone just uses a fork!!

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Nydj · 14/09/2016 18:58

I am not American but eat the American way as described above and generally don't care what anyone thinks about this. If anyone were to say that the way that I was holding and using my cutlery was 'wrong', I would ask them to explain in what way was it wrong - just because things have been done in a certain way in the past does not make it right in my books.

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Nydj · 14/09/2016 18:59

Oops, I wasn't trying to antagonise you Every!

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ErrolTheDragon · 14/09/2016 18:59

Whether any of these methods of using cutlery is 'wrong', what would be appalling manners would be for anyone to make negative comments about anyone other than their own child in private. The keystone of good manners is avoiding making other people uncomfortable.

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OhTheRoses · 14/09/2016 18:59

I have never seen anybody do this. I would never comment but I'd think it odd.

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DropYourSword · 14/09/2016 18:59

I am left handed. I can only ever use a knife in my right hand, so if I need a knife and fork I'll use them the 'right' way round. If I only need a fork, or a spoon, I alternate between left and right hand very randomly!

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Whatsername17 · 14/09/2016 19:00

I believe in good table manners and have taught dd to chew with her mouth closed, not to use fingers/ slurp or luck her knife etc. It just never occurred to me to be mindful of which way around she held her cutlery

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