Group of us have know each other from older children's toddler group days, now have varying numbers of children. One mum already has 3 children whom she finds "challenging" to the extent she refuses to leave the house with them on her own, she and her DH always have to tag team or she won't leave the house (she's a sahm) and she uses a lot of child care (after school and holiday clubs, a mothers help type woman who she pays cash in hand to do a bit of cleaning and ironing in term time and babysitting in the holidays so she won't have to take the kids on errands or to the shops with her, almost full time nursery for the youngest) very explicitly because the children are "too much" for her - she says this, and complains bitterly on the frequent occasions her DH works away about how hard it is to cope.
That is how it is, sympathetic noises and all, know it is unreasonable to have an opinion on that and I guess she does find it hard for whatever specific reasons...
But a couple of days ago the group of us, who no longer often meet up, were all at the same place by chance and having a catch up, and after the usual initial moan about coping in the holidays and her cleaner/ mothers help being away for part of the time, she "revealed" her "gossip" which was that she and her DH are ttc again.
Everyone else gushed "how lovely"... and there followed lots of excited baby speculation and gossip and all - all very delightful. Except it's quite hard to gush in delight when it sounds like such a... well... mistake!
Why would you actively ttc when you can barely cope with the kids you have and miss no opportunity to tell people so?
Also why tell people you are ttc? But that is a different topic maybe? :o
Obviously I wouldn't say anything negative - its none of my business. But WIBU just to smile and not contribute to the gushing? If she had announced her pregnancy I would have said congratulations and assumed they were making the best of a contraceptive failure, but I would have felt like a hypocrite congratulating her on ttc!
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AIBU?
AIBU not to gush when somebody who struggles with her kids says she is ttc again?
69 replies
5moreminutes · 01/09/2016 12:14
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