DD was born a week ago.
Inlaws, DH's dad and his girlfriend, came to visit when she was two days old. They arrived at 9am and didn't leave until 7.30pm... we were bloody exhausted and weren't expecting them to stay quite so long. Nothing in messages exchanged beforehand suggested it would be an all-day thing.
We ended up feeding them lunch and dinner (they brought their breakfast with them!) while they literally sat on the sofa all day drinking tea made by me and DH. I'm breastfeeding, and at that point hadn't figured out her latch 100% so walked, injured cowboy style, upstairs every hour to feed the baby. No offers to remove themselves to another room. No offers to do anything at all apart from sit and cuddle the baby between feeds, watch TV and eat my biscuits.
They didn't even get up to take their cups to the kitchen and waited for me or DH to clear the plates from their laps. They also didn't bring a congratulations card (not that that matters at all, but given their behaviour it was like the cherry on top of an ill-mannered cupcake)
To be fair they're usually like this, and it is annoying. But we thought they'd be better visitors with a newborn baby around. Obviously not.
They want to visit again tomorrow. I really don't want a repeat of last week where we're waiting on them hand-and-foot but I don't exactly know how to avoid it once they're here, parked on the sofa, refusing to move 
AIBU?
to crack down on this rude behaviour?
OohMavis · 29/08/2016 11:48
Tell them (or get DH to tell them) in advance it will be an hour max as you are exhausted etc. DH needs to enforce this by reminding them at 50 mins that you're all tired but it's been great to see them, and at 55 mins be clearer but smiley and friendly and say it's time for you to leave, it's family nap time now.
Re drinks etc - when they arrive, say - help yourself to tea or coffee, the stuff is in the kitchen, and I'd love a tea thanks! Leave a pack of biscuits out (if you want to offer biscuits).
Ask them politely to help - please could you put your cups in the sink, please could you make me some toast, etc. Some people need to be explicitly but politely be told what to do as it's not obvious to everyone. Sometimes I think it's a relief for some people when they are clearly told the rules.
Plan it with DH and arrange a code between you to say when you've had enough, when you need them to leave, or when you want baby back from them. Get DH to help you as it's hard when you're post partum and so vulnerable.
You don't have to let them hold baby by the way! Just say baby needs mummy today or whatever. Nobody is owed a cuddle. And you know what is best for your baby.
Also you don't have to have them round at all if you don't want to, especially you're having trouble getting bf sorted. Totally acceptable to cancel and say you're not up to it. This is one time in your life where you and baby come first, and everyone else and their wishes come way down below yours.
And congratulations! 
"No" is a fabulous word, OP, and here I think you have every justifiable right to use it.
I hope you get some peace and quiet - and congratulations on your new baby DD
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.