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AIBU?

A 4 month old baby can never sleep "too much"

30 replies

Rollonbedtime7pm · 28/08/2016 09:06

Just that really!

My DD2 slept loads yesterday - 3 hours in the morning, 2 1/2 after lunch, another catnap at 4:30.

She slept through the night on Thursday and Friday night and DH was worried last night that she had napped too much and so wouldn't do it again. I said babies of this age can't ever nap "too much" and considering our other 2 were having crappy little half hour sleeps at this age, we should just be glad she sleeps!

I think he is going to start suggesting we wake her in the daytime (incidentally, she didn't sleep through last night; woke at 3) and I want to be able to assure hime that would be unreasonable!

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EmzDisco · 28/08/2016 09:08

My life motto is never wake a sleeping baby! Just enjoy it while it lasts Smile

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user1471552005 · 28/08/2016 09:15

emzdisco that is outdated and potentially dangerous advice.

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BertieBotts · 28/08/2016 09:17

No it isn't. You don't need to wake a sleeping baby unless advised by a medical professional. This might happen if the baby isn't gaining enough weight or for some other reason is likely to sleep through needed feeds. This is unlikely for a 4 month old. Another reason to wake would be if you suspect concussion. Again unlikely in a 4 month old. Or if you're worried that they are sleeping because they are overheating. Which might be a concern, but as general advice, "Never wake a sleeping baby" is just fine.

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mrsfuzzy · 28/08/2016 09:18

user unless they are ill surely babies will sleep as much as they need,Confused it is the main time when their brains are developing. please educate me with the 'new thinking' as i'm probably way out of date on this one.

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mrsfuzzy · 28/08/2016 09:21

thank you bertie that makes total sense, i think user was a tad worrying in that comment, especially for new mums/dads.

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MLGs · 28/08/2016 09:21

I think unless you have any other reason to believe she is ill (or shes not gaining weight or something) then just leave her. She may.need the extra sleep for a growth spurt or similar.

Of course you can do a routine where your wake them if you like but no need to do it.

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EnquiringMingeWantsToKnow · 28/08/2016 09:26

I personally wouldn't let a baby sleep for three hours in the daytime because I'm a great believer in getting as much daylight and food into them during the daytime as humanly possible. But that's just me.

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PaperdollCartoon · 28/08/2016 09:26

My nephew (now 3) was like this. Slept through the night almost from the get go, slept 12 hours a night and then a 3 hour day time nap from about 6 months to 2 and a half. We'd have him overnight and he'd go down at 8/9pm and still be asleep when DP had left for work in the morning at 8.30am. My DSis actually took him to the doctor but was told it was fine, he just likes to sleep a lot. She was just very lucky! Unless advised otherwise by a doctor and baby is happy and healthy, it's fine.

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user1471552005 · 28/08/2016 09:34

It's bad general advice.

My mother was of the opinion the " sleep is as good as food" and " never wake a sleeping baby".

While I agree that for a healthy 4 month old gaining well long stretches of sleep are fine, for younger, small babies, or those not gaining well it is bad advice.

The problem is with these snappy catch phrases is that they get over applied and used generally, and can have catastrophic consequences. I have seen babies admitted to hospital because their parents believed that they should never wake a sleeping baby.

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user1471552005 · 28/08/2016 09:35

"Unless advised otherwise by a doctor"

Many babies never see a doctor once discharged from hospital.

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marcopront · 28/08/2016 09:45

User you object to snappy catch phases but are not giving any details yourself.
Why have babies been admitted to hospital because they were not woken up?

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user1471552005 · 28/08/2016 10:08

Small babies or those with poor weight gain become very tired. Sometimes too tired to wake up.
Babies blood sugar levels can drop and they become dehydrated. I have seen three babies rushed to hospital because their parents had allowed them to sleep for dangerously long.

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CRazzyyAce · 28/08/2016 10:11

My four month is the same op wakes up for numberous feeds inbetween, I regularly check to make sure he's not too old or too warm.

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Marmalade85 · 28/08/2016 10:15

Mine is 8 months and still has 2 - 3 long naps per day. Trying to cut them down as he still wakes twice in the night and I'm back at work.

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JustMarriedBecca · 28/08/2016 10:18

I'd say at 4 months it's fine and, to be honest, it's probably a growth spurt. Mine did that and slept through (then spent until 10 months waking all night).

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BertieBotts · 28/08/2016 10:37

Brand new babies are visited at home by a midwife and health visitors after that. Parents then usually take babies to a clinic to be weighed regularly.

All catchphrases need common sense applied - of course there are situations where you wake a baby, it's not literal with the "never"! But as a general guideline? Perfectly fine.

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BombadierFritz · 28/08/2016 10:44

agree with user on this. I too know a couple of babies who ended up dangerously ill because they became too weak and sleepy to feed. both times the parents had said that exact phrase beforehand.

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user1471552005 · 28/08/2016 10:56

I had one visit from a midwife in the first 4 weeks when my daughter was born.
Services are stretched.
It's a dangerous phrase. Many parents do take it literally and babies do become ill.
The three babies I saw hospitalised had parents who took this phrase literally.
It's fine if you are educated, have access to information and in a position to question.
Not all parents are in this position.

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mummymeister · 28/08/2016 10:56

One of my DC has heart disease, diagnosed a few months after birth. I knew there was a problem from day 1 because DC slept so much more than all my NCT friends babies and was difficult to feed due to being so sleepy. the problem was missed by the midwife, hv and doctors first check. however I had a gut feeling that this wasn't right despite being given this advice over and over again.

go with your instinct. if your baby is happy healthy and gaining weight well and you are relaxed about it then no problem.

but if in anyway there is a little nagging voice saying hang on this baby is sleeping way too much/more than they used to etc then make a fuss and get seen. an overly sleepy baby is often a first sign of a problem.

so yes as a general guideline its fine but always go with YOUR gut feeling not anyone elses as you know your baby the best.

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Rollonbedtime7pm · 28/08/2016 11:54

OK, to clarify, she is eating well, happy and gaining weight.

This was a semi lighthearted thread BTW, I am nothe actually concerned by her sleeping and my husband was only trying to preserve the peaceful night!

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Rollonbedtime7pm · 28/08/2016 11:56

And also, she has as many days when she sleeps like shite so definitely not an overly sleepy baby usually!

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mummymeister · 28/08/2016 12:24

glad to hear it rollonbedtime7pm. just posting my experience because I wanted to tell others to trust their instincts. hope that the couple of days of good sleeping aren't followed by bad!

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sleepy16 · 28/08/2016 12:34

Most baby's will go through days where they sleep more esp when they are going through a growth/development spurt.
Totally fine and totally normal.
Obviously like others have said if baby is poorly or is not gaining weight, and when is awake not feeding and or not behaving like a baby of that age should, then do get medical advice.

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weebarra · 28/08/2016 12:39

Like mummymeister, my DS2 has congenital heart defects, which we undiagnosed at birth. He had heart failure at 10 days and the main symptom was that he was very sleepy and sweated when feeding. If I hadn't followed my instincts he would be dead now, and that's not me being dramatic, as he arrested within minutes of getting to the hospital.

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EmzDisco · 28/08/2016 13:24

Yes my "advice", not really sure that's quite what it was, was under the assumption there was no other concerns about the baby, who was otherwise healthy, happy, well fed etc. As the OPs post suggested. If she said my baby sleeps loads, doesn't eat, seems a bit dazed or something obviously that's different. But she didn't. It seemed like a lighthearted post rather than a serious concern, and thus I thought was my response was appropriate.

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