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AIBU?

To pick the bigger/nicer house

425 replies

SiriusBlackDeservedBetter · 25/08/2016 21:47

All names/locations have all been changed.

My Great Uncle had no kids and passed away months ago, recently his solicitor got into contact, which was rather suprising as although he had some money, I didn't think I'd get anything at all.

He's left my sister and I a house each, the issue is with the way his Will is written. It states:

'I leave Rose either the Birchwood house or the Maple house to choose from and then Lily may have whichever one has not been chosen'

This means that I get first pick of 2 houses and then my sister can have whichever one I don't pick.

I don't know why he's written it up like that, we both barely saw or even knew him.

My sister and I both have homes of our own, I have a 2 bed house with 1 DC and she has a 3 bed house with 4 DC.

Birchwood House is absolutely lovely, it's 4 beds, a dining room, a massive garden and it's only 20 mins away from our current location.

Whereas Maple House is an hour and a half away, in a rural area, it's a bungalow with 3 beds.

I want to pick Birchwood house and live in it and either sell or rent out our current property, DSis thinks that that would be really selfish of me as she needs the space more and as her kids are older it would be too disruptive to move them any further then our current location, but I think she could sell Maple House and her current house and upgrade and stay in the area, she argues that I could do the same, which is true.

OP posts:
chickenowner · 25/08/2016 21:50

Choose the one you want!

Rumpelstiltskin143 · 25/08/2016 21:51

You have first pick. It's unfortunate that the will is written that way, but it was. If you really want Birchwood then take it.

Princecharlesfirstwife · 25/08/2016 21:52

Why don't you sell both houses and split the proceeds evenly?

Trifleorbust · 25/08/2016 21:53

Urgh. She shouldn't be arguing about this as it puts you in an intolerable position. The will is clear, do as you choose.

MakeMyWineADouble · 25/08/2016 21:53

What would your sis do if the roles were reversed?

thisismeusernameything · 25/08/2016 21:53

Chose the house you want. She sounds like the selfish one to me. It's unfortunate for her but she needs to respect your uncles wishes

Rosae · 25/08/2016 21:53

Can you make an agreement to sell them both and then split the proceeds equally? Seems the only way to make it fair, one of you is always going to resent the other for living in the house you both want.

Wincarnis · 25/08/2016 21:54

You get first pick in the terms of the will so go ahead and pick the one you want. Both of you are lucky to get a nice inheritance. Enjoy it and make the most of it. He could have left you sod all!

TheFairyCaravan · 25/08/2016 21:54

I'd either sell both houses and split the proceeds or draw straws to see who gets which house.

shaggedthruahedgebackwards · 25/08/2016 21:55

YANBU to choose the house you prefer

hazeimcgee · 25/08/2016 21:56

You get firsr pick and can do what you want but what matters more - house or sis? It does seem reasonable that the larger fanily gets the larger house but i think the only real answer is to sell both.

If either one of you can afflrd to outright buy the pretty one then fair enough

blueturtle6 · 25/08/2016 21:57

She's lucky to be gifted any house and should stop acting spoilt really...

WiddlinDiddlin · 25/08/2016 21:57

Can you live with the fall-out if you do what you want to do, will you get support from other family members if you choose the house you want?

Personally, I'd do it - the will says thats what he wanted, AND I think it goes in your favour that you want to LIVE in the house rather than sell it on and that sentimentality does tend to mean something to a lot of people.

I realise she wants to live in it too but.. the fact she has 3 kids and needs more space is really not relevant, you were given first choice, she wasn't - if having more space for her offspring was THAT crucial she'd already be doing something about that ie extending her home or buying somewhere bigger (and if she is thinking of doing either then the money from selling or renting her gifted property would facilitate that).

HaPPy8 · 25/08/2016 21:57

Id sell and split the proceeds.

Poocatcherchampion · 25/08/2016 21:58

How much do you like your sister?

Do you see much of her?

Tough one but people are ultimately more important than bricks and mortar to lots of people

hazeimcgee · 25/08/2016 21:58

Does your sos live near you as well? Just in terms of distance to move.

Given dofferences in valuations beteeen areas is there much cash difference between the two?

LollyMcLolface · 25/08/2016 21:58

I would definitely sell both and split the proceeds.

Trifleorbust · 25/08/2016 21:58

No, her sister shouldn't get to guilt her into giving up a valuable inheritance just because has a bigger family! Her uncle clearly gave OP the choice.

SiriusBlackDeservedBetter · 25/08/2016 21:59

But neither of us wants to sell Birchwood house, it's an amazing house and I really really want to live in it, I think the space argument is invalid as she now has a property to sell meaning that she can upgrade to a bigger property.

MakeMyWineADouble, She'd pick Birchwood 100%

OP posts:
Missgraeme · 25/08/2016 22:00

Your duty is to your uncle and HIS wishes before your sisters wishes. Choose the house you want.

Trifleorbust · 25/08/2016 22:01

Live in it, OP. Not ideal the way your uncle set this up, but you can't both have it.

hazeimcgee · 25/08/2016 22:02

How big a rift will it cause?

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MakeMyWineADouble · 25/08/2016 22:02

Well then I would pick the house you want as others have said she is still getting a house she can rent or sell that's amazing! Hopefully she will see that too

HeadDreamer · 25/08/2016 22:02

I would suggest selling both and split the proceeds. I think it's very sad to ruin a relationship over inheritance. Assuming you two get on OK currently. Family is more important than the houses.

anotherdayanothersquabble · 25/08/2016 22:03

Could you have both properties valued and you pay her the difference between Birch wood and Maple then you get the house you want and she gets money to buy a house she doesn't have to move to and also likes?,

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