To only tell my employer I'm shortlisted for a job if I actually get it?

[NapQueen]

There seems to be a culture at my workplace of managers getting annoyed when people don't talk about their plans. When other people have left there's always a "god I mean they could have let us know they weren't happy" etc. They take it personally.

If I've applied internally within the company I've been quite transparent about it but I'm now shortlisted and at final interview stage with a totally different company in a totally different industry.

If I get offered the job the first my employer will know is when the reference request comes in.

Aibu to keep this u derived wraps til then?

[OhNoNotMyBaby]

If they offer and you accept, I would tell your manager at that point. References are usually requested after the offer has been made and accepted.

Otherwise, say nothing.

[MrsHathaway]

That's totally normal.

People don't only leave because they're unhappy. And in any case managers should have an idea of the morale of their direct reports.

Good luck!

[NapQueen]

I had a performance review last week and we touched on the fact that I wanted more family friendly hours and that an internal position with better hours had come up and my intentions had been to apply yet when it came up the wage was much lower than my current one and so I'd not applied.

She knows I want better hours (impossible in my department and very rare in the entire industry) so I'd imagine she wouldn't be too surprised but I don't want to feel sly.

[StickyProblem]

YANBU. Nobody would ever get anywhere if we all did that. I know someone who was sacked for telling her boss she was applying elsewhere, and someone else who got intimidated out of leaving a job and moving to the competition with vague threats of suing him, which they couldn't have done anyway.
Look out for yourself - your managers are looking out for themselves.

[MrsHathaway]

This isn't the middle ages. You don't owe her the information until it actually concerns her.

Companies that want lots of notice of staff turnover set long notice periods. If you set a four-week notice period you can't complain if you only get four weeks' notice of someone's intention to leave!

[Anonymouses]

She knows you want better hours and it's a totally different industry so I see no issue.

If you had always said oh I'm so happy and then left I can see there would be annoyance. It sounds like the company you are in now cannot accommodate what you need (better hours without a pay cut) so it makes sense you would look elsewhere.

Tell them when you get the job as otherwise it could just make everything awkward and weird.

[BuggersMuddle]

Good grief no. I have never told an employer until the screening checks are complete and I have a firm offer in writing.

[HeCantBeSerious]

References are usually requested after the offer has been made and accepted.

More commonly recruiters want to request references before interview nowadays. Most will ask if that's okay.

[OhNoNotMyBaby]

No HeCant, that's not true. Why would anyone request references before interviewing someone? It would be a complete waste of time. You could interview 20 people and decide that none of them is suitable so it would be pointless to ask for references for those 20.

They will ask you to complete the details on the application form, but they won't do anything unless they have offered and you have accepted.

[HeCantBeSerious]

I've attended several interviews over the past 2 months and all but 1 wanted to request references prior to interview.

Also my experience after 15 years in HR management and consultancy. But sure, what do I know? 🙄

[0pti0na1]

Just ignore the comments from annoyed managers. Moving jobs is a normal things that happens in workplaces and they should treat it professionally. It's not your problem if they take it personally instead.

[AliMonkey]

OhNo, you say that providing references for 20 people is pointless as at most one will get the job. But so is interviewing 20 people who references might show to be useless - particularly if it's a long recruitment process requiring input from several members of staff. Having said that, I both recruit for my paid job in a profession where references often just say "X worked here from date 1 to date 2" so basic waste of time and in my voluntary role (but recruiting paid workers) where references much fuller and useful. So can see it both ways!

[liptolinford]

I've never had anyone contact my referees prior to an interview. It's only at the point where they'd be finding out anyway that I tell the current employer.

[HeCantBeSerious]

It's also statutory guidance for schools to request references prior to interview. It's really not that uncommon.

[ilovesooty]

Have you requested annual leave for the day of the interview?

[purplevase4]

I've never had anyone contact my referees prior to an interview

me neither - except for one job.

It's not usual, except in the educational sphere.

I would not tell my current employer until I had a firm job offer.

[HeCantBeSerious]

I don't work in education and I've been asked to agree to references before interview as part of an application 5 times in the last 6 weeks.

[NapQueen]

sooty I work shifts so it's planned for a day I'm off

[gettingtherequickly]

I'very hado recruiters ask for references, but never from my current employers.
In my experience references are requested post offer and acceptance.
Otherwise you'very just told your manager you'require looking for a job elsewhere.

[Lules]

In my field (academia) references are pretty much always taken up before interview. Sometimes you have to get your referees to send their references with your application form. And you often need 3/4. I appreciate that's unusual though.

In response to your question OP - I wouldn't worry about it. People leaving is just one of those things.

[HeCantBeSerious]

I am my current employer so references from former employers are very much done on a favour basis. In order that they aren't barraged for requests I've not given permission for them to be approached before interview except for 1 job and have explained that to the potential employers too.

[gettingtherequickly]

Ah okay he can't, references from previous employers, particularly if you're currently self employed makes perfect sense.
Explaining to an employer that you're actively looking for work can make it awkward from then on until you leave, (which could be some time).