That's it really. I made friends with her years ago and we stopped contact after she got married. I never heard from her after that and it made me realise I had been used for company rather than for a genuine friendship.
Her marriage ended after months and she returned to this country 3 years later. I had no message or phone call in those few years she was not in the UK.
I then bumped into her in a restaurant and we chatted while my son played with her daughter. There is a year between them. She added me on Facebook afterwards and I accepted just to be nice.
Since then she has asked me to meet up every single day. I feel completely and utterly smothered. She's clearly very lonely with no friends. She has no friends because unfortunately she just isn't a likeable person and she lies a lot/seems emotionally unstable. She spends a lot of time talking about her boyfriend who she met at University when everyone knows she met him online and has never even met him.
My Son enjoys playing with her daughter and so I did agree to meet up quite a bit and I wouldn't have minded meeting up once a week or even twice a week.
If she had her way she would see me every single day, all day. So far this week I met her in town for most of the day. That was Monday. She then arranged to meet up on Tuesday to go to soft play, Wednesday for a fair, Thursday for swimming, Friday for a picnic!!! These are all really nice activities but I didn't want to spend that much time with her and while I do meet up about 4 times a week with her because my son likes her daughter and I feel sorry for her, I'm just getting exhausted.
I managed to make an excuse to not go out yesterday and she arranged on the phone to go swimming today at 11am. I said 'oh I will see how I get on'. She has rang me 5 times now to see if I was going so I made my apologises and said I had some food shopping to do. She then said it was okay we would meeting up on Saturday!
I have tried to introduce her to some more friends and have introduced her to a lot of my Mummy friends. None of them liked her and she tried adding them on Facebook after the first meeting which they found a bit forward. They also didn't like that she refuses to let her ex see their child (she says she wants a clean break) but it is very selfish when he's a good Dad. He hasn't seen their daughter for over a year.
If she lived locally I wouldn't mind, and if I liked her more I wouldn't mind. But I need to some how faze out this friendship as I'm feeling really smothered and to be honest I think she's only using me for company. If she got a boyfriend in the area I would never hear from her again. She lives 45 mins drive away and more on public transport so it's also a financial issue meeting up as we meet somewhere in the middle each time. I don't enjoy travelling that amount in the week.
I know some people are really lonely and would love someone like her! I'm just not the right match for her.
Honestly, what would you do? Any tips on fazing out this friendship? She has already decided I'm her bestfriend and it's kinda creepy.
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AIBU?
To not want to meet up with my friend EVERY SINGLE DAY.
54 replies
littlemisssocialworker · 29/07/2016 09:51
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