Bringing crap food on play dates- is this a thing now?

(233 Posts)
bleedingnora Tue 26-Jul-16 08:49:31

So holiday time, loads of kids over to play.
All bar one of them has brought some food with them- mega bag of haribos, family pack of crisps, packet of biscuits etc.

Same thing has happened other days when kids come over.

Clearly this isn't for them to eat alone in place of whatever food I might offer (ie picky kid wanting to ensure they have something they like to eat on them) it is a gift to share type thing.

Is this a thing now? I never send anything with mine unless they are going out somewhere and need a packed lunch or something.
I might on occasion send some homemade biscuits or cakes of the kids have been baking and I want to get them used up. But that's it.

I don't want all this shit snack food at home and don't want to feel obliged to open it when the kids are over.
I have food in for a decent lunch so what do I do just put it in the cupboard? Send it back?

Will the parents ask their kids if they got to eat this food and then think it weird if they didn't?
Last week one mate brought some mini chocolate things so the kids all had one after lunch but today we have so much crap I don't really want to be opening it all.

bleedingnora Tue 26-Jul-16 08:50:30

And FFS in the time I took to type that one child has already asked me if they can open the crisps they brought.

It is 8.49!

MammyV Tue 26-Jul-16 08:51:39

I've noticed this as well it really annoys me so i take the stuff off them and put it in a bag and say 'oh you can just take all this home with you to eat, lots of food here' and it's been fine lol

Gizlotsmum Tue 26-Jul-16 08:53:03

See I would bring 'treat food' for a play date so maybe sweets or doughnuts, I wouldn't be offended if someone sent them. However they wouldn't be opened till after lunch...

Gileswithachainsaw Tue 26-Jul-16 08:53:06

I've never had a kid show up with crap. Nor do I send mine with any.

I do struggle to.unserstand these weird notions that kids need to eat constantly....

Breakfast lunch dinner. That's it. If you can't survive a two hour play date. Somethings wrong

WipsGlitter Tue 26-Jul-16 08:55:18

That is one early playdate!!!

Brandonstarkflakes Tue 26-Jul-16 08:57:41

Yeah, what the hell time did the kids arrive?!

We are all still in bed watching telly!

witsender Tue 26-Jul-16 08:59:29

If it is the afternoon and I am going for tea with parents too I will bring a packet of nice biscuits to share...but this sounds nuts!

Therealloislane Tue 26-Jul-16 08:59:44

I see where you're coming from & I'd be the same.

However, if the parents see fit to send the crap then they mustn't mind their children eating it. Not up to you to police it. Just look out for your own child. You know they don't get rubbish at other times so maybe you could make an exception on a play date?

On another note - who has people over this early?

LolaLockdale Tue 26-Jul-16 09:01:39

Wow, that is early! I give mine treats to share if it's a very long play date. usually a packet of donuts, but if it's only for 2-3 hours I don't bother

NataliaOsipova Tue 26-Jul-16 09:02:38

It's a little gesture - like you'd take a bottle of wine or flowers if you were going, as an adult, to someone's house for dinner. I'd usually take some biscuits or something to a play date. If you don't want your kids to eat them, just offer all the kids some different food. If you are gracious about it ( "gosh, we didn't end up eating the Haribo - tell you what, why don't you take them home and enjoy them") then there's no harm in sending them home again.

Aworldofmyown Tue 26-Jul-16 09:04:11

They do for sleepovers, never had it for a playdate tbh.

Clonakilty Tue 26-Jul-16 09:04:57

It's a harmless gift really - children's equivalent of a bunch of flowers. I suppose it depends on how old your DC are. When my DD was younger I'd just put out a handful of the stuff in a bowl and that was their lot, regarding snacks. Now that she's a teenager they do their own thing - it usually involves trashing the kitchen whilst making muffins, pizza or whatever. But I'm quite easy about it.

NavyandWhite Tue 26-Jul-16 09:11:27

Why so early? My god they'll be hyper by 10am if they all that crap.

How come you've got them all?

Udderz Tue 26-Jul-16 09:12:11

I sometimes send stuff but generally things like a bunch of bananas or milk or a cheap bag of tangerines. They are just a small thankyou gesture and don't have to be eaten during the playdate. I don't bother giving anything if playdates are fairly switched between households.

Three times recently I've had lunch laid out ready for visiting families and they have arrived, seen the food Ive prepared but instantly given bags of crap sweets to all the children.

bleedingnora Tue 26-Jul-16 09:16:42

Early starts as parents are working.
Team tagging holiday cover!
Got them all til 5 shock

Right I'll send it back I think with a nice comment that we didn't get time.

Planning to bake and decorate cakes so they can eat them instead.

Seems this is a new thing though as never used to happen.

Notso Tue 26-Jul-16 09:18:11

I've had it for sleepovers but not for just a friend to play situation.

I send DS2 with food but not loads of junk and only because of nut allergy.

Udderz Tue 26-Jul-16 09:18:42

It is a little disappointing when everyone brings rubbish treats though. Why can't it be healthier stuff? I will have usually made a cake and so the kids don't need anything else.

Needmoresleep Tue 26-Jul-16 09:19:39

Hide everything for now and then let them gorge themselves with sugar just before it time to go home. And have the parents cope with the sugar rush.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Tue 26-Jul-16 09:22:59

I'd probably do this for a holiday play, but not a term-time one, especially if you were having the DCs for the whole day. It's the equivalent of a bunch of flowers or bringing good biscuits. Although I'm now wondering why I'd do this in the holidays and not in term time...

MrsGradyOldLady Tue 26-Jul-16 09:24:08

I send mine over with things like that. As others have said - it's more of a gift really with no expectation that they actually have to eat it all. Just put it in the cupboard for another time if you don't want them to have it today.

TortoiseVTurtle Tue 26-Jul-16 09:25:48

It's a nice gesture, just take it in the spirit that it was meant- kindness.

TheWindInThePillows Tue 26-Jul-16 09:26:38

I hate this, one of mine is overweight and all those extra 'gifts' just don't help, as they seem to loom large in her mind. I have been known to throw out those big containers of muffins (given by one child), as I just don't want to eat muffins for days.

I have taken stuff over though, when staying with a friend recently, I took some 'treats' which she returned to me! When I thought it through I saw she was right, it's not that helpful to turn up with cakes/sweets for children all the time.

The odd treat isn't that anymore, it's endless.

blueskyinmarch Tue 26-Jul-16 09:28:03

Bloomin’ heck they brought some sweets/crisps not crack cocaine. It is meant as a nice gesture. At snack time put out a few crisps and sweets along with fruit or whatever. it is the holidays - live a little! Don’t send it back with them, that is a really horrible thing to do, a bit like giving back a box of biscuits an adult brought if they came to visit you. People can be so joyless on here sometimes.

bleedingnora Tue 26-Jul-16 09:29:20

Yes ok I can see it as a nice gesture but actually i don't want that stuff in the cupboards.
We won't eat it.

If we have sweets or crisps it is in a particular setting like the cinema and kids want to choose them not take from the cupboard. We rarely eat stuff like that and I don't mean that in a ooh get us with our healthy choices.

Why don't they arrive with actual Wine!! Now that would be helpful after 9 hours of the little darlings.

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