Just passing and popping in.

(42 Posts)
Patterkiller Mon 25-Jul-16 20:29:11

AIBU or is 8.30 in a Monday night not a great time for the ILs to 'pop' in. They are starting to do this more and more now they are both retired. Dds are on school holiday and teens granted, but we still work full time and Mondays especially are so deflating. I just want my pjs and kindle right now. I haven't the energy to be unexoectably sociable.

WIBU to quickly run a bath and pretend it was already planned. DH says go for it but I feel a bit rude.

chickenowner Mon 25-Jul-16 20:29:58

Do it!

MiddleClassProblem Mon 25-Jul-16 20:30:51

I'd do it

Patterkiller Mon 25-Jul-16 20:31:16

That's all I need thanks. Sprinting up the stairs as I type.

M0nstersinthecl0set Mon 25-Jul-16 20:33:08

Enjoy wine

happypoobum Mon 25-Jul-16 20:35:20

Well that sorts tonight, but you need to think of some long term solutions to this whilst you are soaking don't you?

Like DH telling them to stop popping in at inconvenient times?

I stay in my pjs if I'm in them I have a baby though so apparently your allowed even though I did it before DD

MiddleClassProblem Mon 25-Jul-16 20:36:37

Let them pop in, tell them you have a back prob and go said you need a hot bath every night and enjoy! 😂

Patterkiller Mon 25-Jul-16 20:43:43

They used to do it when Dds were small and it really didn't do wonders for our relationship. But the intrim years have been fine, we still see them every other week but it's starting to crank up again now they're bored. DH isn't happy either but is happy to be the sacrificial lamb tonight but they have very very thick skins.

I'm enjoying my bubbles and even managed to sneak a glass of wine up.

NavyandWhite Mon 25-Jul-16 20:43:51

It is a bit rude. Would you do the same to your parents?

Patterkiller Mon 25-Jul-16 20:45:24

My mum wouldn't call at this time.

positivity123 Mon 25-Jul-16 20:46:17

I'd do it. Don't feel guilty.

NavyandWhite Mon 25-Jul-16 20:46:54

Fair enough.

cozietoesie Mon 25-Jul-16 20:47:43

They can sleep in till the sun's high. You can't. DH should have a word with them.

SouthDownsSunshine Mon 25-Jul-16 20:49:47

We had to have this conversation when we first moved near the in laws. DH made it very clear they were welcome anytime, as long as they called in advance! MIL once popped in one day when she thought we were out (she wanted to show her friend the work we'd done on the house) and was mortified when it turned out I was working at home that day. It's never happened since!

Patterkiller Mon 25-Jul-16 20:50:04

DH should, but probably won't. And the pop in is always a few hours. I just don't have the energy in a Monday.

facepalming Mon 25-Jul-16 20:50:28

I'm so in two minds on this one! on the one hand I think it's kind or sweet that they pop over to say hi like that, and it's theasy kind of family dynamic that I think I would like with my kids when they are older...

on the other hand i would be pissed if I was just ready for a quiet night or about to sit and watch something Id been looking towards too and then they interupted me!

I guess it depends how your relationship is - and how long they intend to stay for!

Patterkiller Mon 25-Jul-16 20:51:42

They aren't even that close. Around an hours drive away and weren't passing, they needed to drive here to get here.

facepalming Mon 25-Jul-16 20:52:05

southdownssunshine - as in just let herself in?!!

NavyandWhite Mon 25-Jul-16 20:52:16

They are his parents though. Maybe he likes to see them?

Patterkiller Mon 25-Jul-16 20:53:18

And we only saw them on Saturday. 😑

MiddleClassProblem Mon 25-Jul-16 20:54:05

SouthDowns, sounds like we have the same MIL grin

Patterkiller Mon 25-Jul-16 20:54:24

He does, as do I. Just not at 9 on a Monday when we saw them two days ago.

aelah Mon 25-Jul-16 20:55:40

Ha ha my grandparents are like this. Always 'passing' and dropping in then sitting there with nothing to say. My mum used to do exact Same thing as you, Nick off in the bath X

TheOddity Mon 25-Jul-16 20:56:08

Sorry but popping in to me would be maybe dropping something round and staying for a cuppa. Two or three hours is just taking all your evening and it's bloody inconsiderate!

My dad once had a fall out with my mum. They live two hours away. He decided he would come stay in a holiday house they have nearby while he was in exile and decided to unexpectedly 'pop in' to see me that night at 8.30 when I had a one year old to get to bed. I told him to go back home and sort it with my mum and leave me in peace! Sorry but you are not on this earth to fill the gaps in their life. These are always the people who you don't see for dust when they have a better offer.

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