To be emosh and crying

(19 Posts)
Fedupd0tcom Mon 04-Jul-16 21:39:55

So I couldn't make it to another meet up of friends today.

Minor I know.

Only it's happened 10 times now.

It's because I can't take my little one....who is big enough and crazy enough...though I love her to bits....to cause mayhem...so I like her to be in bed at 8pm.

I have no one I can leave her with. DH had to work late. I'm also a carer for my Mum who is ill...though she seems stronger than me.

I love being a Mum but I feel so stuck in sometimes. I know it's normal not to have any time to yourself. But I haven't even had time to get my hair done in over a year!!

I'm so tired. Got loads of work to do at home tonight as well.

Just wanted to go out and have a laugh with my friends. Without kids. To be am adult just for a couple of hours. Aibu? Yes I probably am. I just feel all I do is look after everyone else. Who looks after me? I'm sorry I'm proper tired and chatting nonsense. Please feel free to ignore me.

I do love being a Mummy but today I just feel like I have no support network and I have to look after everyone else and I don't know how to create one....any ideas? I also feel I have no close friendships anymore? And I'm crying cos I'm feeling hormonal. sad

CocktailQueen Mon 04-Jul-16 21:41:53

Can you get a babysitter for times when your dh is working late? I sympathise! How old is dd?

AfroPuffs Mon 04-Jul-16 21:42:59

How about organising a sitter? Its what i do sometimes if I need some adult conversation.

Im a single parent so thats the only choice for me....

Fedupd0tcom Mon 04-Jul-16 21:51:44

I was thinking of it. How did u find out about good babysitters in your area? X

user1467101855 Mon 04-Jul-16 21:56:57

Why can't you get a babysitter like everyone else?

And wtf is emosh?

inlovewithhubby Mon 04-Jul-16 21:59:23

Oh poor you, yanbu, we all feel better with some child free time and it's shit when you can't get it. And I feel for you too, feeling that there's no one to look after you. You need cheering up.
If you don't have childcare, why don't you invite the girls to your place after your child is in bed? Don't need a sitter for that? My partner works away a lot and I do this often, it's lovely and cosy and there is no last orders!
For making links, toddler groups are brilliant, you'll need to try a few to find one that suits you but they are inexpensive and a great way to make local, parent links.

Fedupd0tcom Mon 04-Jul-16 22:10:59

More than happy to get a babysitter if I can find one who is good.

Fedupd0tcom Mon 04-Jul-16 22:14:00

Emosh....emotional. having girls over...great idea. Thank you. Will definitely do that. Where I live not many ppl use babysitters as they all live with extended family (cultural reasons). So im not sure who are the good babysitters locally.

whatyouseeiswhatyouget Mon 04-Jul-16 22:16:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

usual Mon 04-Jul-16 22:21:40

Can't you go out when your DH is not working late?

Fedupd0tcom Mon 04-Jul-16 22:22:13

Thank you....sounds but there is dearth of babysitters in my area ....so thanks for these x

Coconut0il Mon 04-Jul-16 22:24:05

We all need some adult time OP and there's nothing wrong with a good cry. Definitely have your friends round to yours, everyone can bring a drink or snack and you can relax for a little while. How often does your DP work late? Can you plan a different night when he'll definitely be there?

Fedupd0tcom Mon 04-Jul-16 22:24:53

Unfortunately....for numerous reasons he often has to work mad hours right now and they're not set hours so I often don't know when he'll be home earlier. It makes it tough to make plans....not that I do generally

mum2Bomg Mon 04-Jul-16 22:25:10

You need a break X Hugs X

Fedupd0tcom Mon 04-Jul-16 22:30:17

I wish we could go on a date night when he's free....we can't. Lol. I so need to find a babysitter

WhatsGoingOnEh Mon 04-Jul-16 22:34:51

I used to get great babysitters by asking at local nurseries. Loads of staff there supplement their wages by babysitting. Or there's Sitters.com -- I used them quite a lot and they were always good, and you can have the same Sitter each time.

Good luck! And YES to girls' nights at your place! I did that loads when I was a single mum, plus poker nights, dinner parties, shopping evenings... All good fun, cheap, and sociable.

MLGs Mon 04-Jul-16 22:37:48

Yanbu.

Everyone needs some grown up time.

It's not fair if your dh's work dictates that you can't get a sitter in case he comes back. You could book one and (if money not too tight) pay them anyway if he comes home. Have a word with him about how you feel.

SoUnsureMaybe Mon 04-Jul-16 22:43:37

flowersflowersflowers I know exactly how u feel sad xxx

3littlefrogs Mon 04-Jul-16 22:52:50

Have you applied for carer's assessment?

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