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AIBU?

To struggle with birthdays?

5 replies

puzzledbyadream · 01/07/2016 11:31

I'm 25 today, and to be fair this is a particularly poor birthday. I was just pipped to a job I really, really, really wanted, loads of people have dropped out of coming to my birthday thing and my best friend's boyfriend's mental health is particularly terrible and will likely affect the evening (this is really not his fault, but just feels like another thing conspiring against me!)

Even before all this though, I just find birthdays really hard. They just make me realise what I haven't achieved compared to my peers, and I currently live by myself so it's all just such an anti-climax. Am I being really selfish by not enjoying birthdays any more? Or is this just a part of being an adult? I know it won't always be like this but today it just feels extra hard.

OP posts:
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HarryPottersMagicWand · 01/07/2016 11:35

You are young, you have plenty of time to achieve the things you want to.

I think it can be natural to not like your birthday as much when you get older. Although I didn't feel this until I hit my 30's, to me it's a sign as I'm getting older and I don't like it whereas before I always loved my birthday. Plus mine seem to signal to me how few people actually give a shit and think a line on Facebook or a text matters (talking close family here).

Sorry about then job. Hopefully others will come along and you will be fine. Make a list of the things you would like to achieve (don't put an age limit on it) and tick them off as you go. Happy birthday! 🎂

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WorraLiberty · 01/07/2016 11:36

Happy Birthday! Flowers Cake Wine

Sorry you plans are going a bit pear shaped.

How is not enjoying birthdays selfish? Confused

The last birthday I got excited about was my 21st and I'm 47 now Grin

I don't like or dislike them really. They're just another day for me, but one in which I'll normally go out to dinner with my dh and the kids. Even then, we normally wait for the closest Saturday to it.

In fact I'd say it's the opposite of selfish when I think of a few people I know, who think the world should actually stop for their 'special day', and everyone should drop their plans immediately.

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LuckyBitches · 01/07/2016 12:41

Happy Birthday!

YANBU - I've always found my birthdays depressing. I have a good number of friends that I have a lovely time with throughout the year, but always somehow feel hard done by and unloved on my birthday. Must be something very deep-rooted. These days I just do something nice with DH.

CakeCakeCake
WineWineWine

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ToastyFingers · 01/07/2016 13:36

Happy Birthday!
I had a shit 25th a few months ago and it still smarts a bit.
Plus, I've got a fair few grey hairs since so am feeling old as fuck.

Try to enjoy yourself, or commiserate by getting very drunk.

Thankfully your Birthday is only for one day and tomorrow you can go back to normal!

Cake for you and
WineWineWine for later.

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SouperSal · 01/07/2016 14:00

I was brought up to really appreciate birthdays - not everyone makes 25.

Comparison is the thief of joy. Enjoy your birthday. WineCakeFlowers

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