My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

AIBU?

To not contribute to this leaving present?

114 replies

yougotitdude · 26/06/2016 23:05

Started a new job last Wednesday.

A staff member is leaving this Friday and the office (20 of us) have had a whip round to buy her a spa day- £10 contribution each

Collegue has asked us all to bring the money tomorrow- came and told us individually, including me

I dont think I should have to contribute

AIBU?

OP posts:
Floggingmolly · 26/06/2016 23:06

Of course you shouldn't. Just say no,

ohnoppp · 26/06/2016 23:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsTerryPratchett · 26/06/2016 23:08

You shouldn't have to but I would to be part of the team. Unless you're skint because of starting a new job... in which case just tell them that.

OwlinaTree · 26/06/2016 23:08

Ooh this was an episode of friends!

Difficult one. Can you afford to contribute? Although you don't really know the leaver, it might make your colleagues dislike you or think you are mean if you don't put in for it. It might be short term pain, long term gain here.

Filosofikal · 26/06/2016 23:09

Of course not x2

Tell them you don't wish to contribute - don't give a reason or excuse just politely decline.

Celticlassie · 26/06/2016 23:09

Why don't you want to contribute? Is it because you don't get on with this person and don't want to wish them well, or is it because you weren't consulted?

OhStacey · 26/06/2016 23:09

YANBU but really for a tenner in a new job I would do it.

Floggingmolly · 26/06/2016 23:11

Op has known the person three days! She doesn't have to wish them well in the form of a leaving present.

acasualobserver · 26/06/2016 23:11

I think it's because the OP has only worked with this colleague for a very short time.

BerylStreep · 26/06/2016 23:14

Just say you don't really know her, so won't be contributing to the gift. Can't see that it is a problem.

Choceeclair123 · 26/06/2016 23:15

YANBU you've only been there for 3 days. If I had been collecting I wouldn't have asked.

Archduke · 26/06/2016 23:17

I think you should contribute. It's only a tenner and if you don't everyone in the office will think you're a cheapskate.

You will have been there almost 2 weeks won't you? (which clearly isn't long but think of it as an investment in friendly office relations)

gamerchick · 26/06/2016 23:17

Just say you're skint because you haven't been paid yet and you can't afford for someone to put it in because you have bills to catch up on.

MrsJoeyMaynard · 26/06/2016 23:19

You shouldn't have to - I think it was a bit off you being asked to contribute, when you've not even been there a week - but having said that, unless it was going to leave me out of pocket, I'd probably contribute anyway to avoid getting off on the wrong foot with the rest of your new colleagues.

farageisacunt · 26/06/2016 23:21

No. You don't have to and they shouldn't have asked you.

You don't know the person.

Onehellofaride · 26/06/2016 23:21

YADNBU but I would anyway. Massively contradictory I know but I would.

RepentAtLeisure · 26/06/2016 23:41

If you can afford it, it's just easier to participate. People can have very long memories over this kind of thing, even though it's irrational.

But if you can't afford it, just have a discreet word with the person organizing it. Say you only just started working there and finances aren't straight yet.

TanTanNubuck · 26/06/2016 23:50

YANBU, but I know I'd end up contributing anyway. It's unfortunate that they asked you.

Xmasbaby11 · 26/06/2016 23:54

Gosh I've never given so much for a leaving present. If we do a whip round for presents it's usually 1 or 2 maximum but no expected amount.

Yanbu. You shouldn't have been asked. I wouldn't pay.

Alasalas2 · 26/06/2016 23:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

yummumto3girls · 27/06/2016 00:14

Totally unfair of them to ask you and put you in this position. That's a lot of money for each person to contribute!

Princesspinkgirl · 27/06/2016 00:18

Although I agree your a new employee new to the team I would just do it due to the fact id want to make a good impression

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

HooseRice · 27/06/2016 00:47

Happened to me but the whip-round was for the family of a colleague who tragically died in a RTA the Friday before the Monday I started.

I paid the £10.

No I wouldn't contribute £10 towards a brand new colleague's collection.

MidniteScribbler · 27/06/2016 02:43

You shouldn't have to, but with the politics the surround office collections, if you can afford it, then I'd just chip in and write it off for the sake of workplace harmony in your new job.

Whiteplate1 · 27/06/2016 02:58

They shouldn't have asked you

Office collection at my work have got ridiculous lately. In the last 6 weeks we have had two birthdays, two people leaving, one retiring, one person getting married.

I have stopped contributing

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.