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AIBU?

To think it's not her business?

30 replies

Wetbankhols · 31/05/2016 14:39

My friend doesn't like me working. Or rather she disapproves of what I do.

I work very part time and the hours do suit me. But if she asks what am I doing and I say work she tuts 'jokingly' and says things like 'when are you going to give that up?'

It sounds odd when I write it down but in other ways she's a good friend.

How do you tell someone nicely to mind their own?

OP posts:
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myownprivateidaho · 31/05/2016 14:41

Why does she disapprove? What's your job?

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ImperialBlether · 31/05/2016 14:42

This is just about the oddest thing I've heard! Why doesn't she like you working? Where does she think you should get your money from? Where does she get hers from?

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Costacoffeeplease · 31/05/2016 14:43

Yes it does sound very odd - haven't you said anything back to her before?

I'd tut 'jokingly' back and if she said it again, be very blunt

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BertrandRussell · 31/05/2016 14:43

What's the job?

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Timeforabiscuit · 31/05/2016 14:43

The phrasing of your post makes it sound like forever living .....

Are you good enough friends to tell her you've made your choice and to stop mentioning as it's getting tiresome?

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myownprivateidaho · 31/05/2016 14:44

I'm wondering if it's forever living or similar? or prostitution

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WorraLiberty · 31/05/2016 14:44

You know you're just going to get a shit ton of posts now, asking what you do?

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PotteringAlong · 31/05/2016 14:44

Drug dealer?
Hooker?
Mlm?

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BertrandRussell · 31/05/2016 14:44

It's either pyramid selling or prostitution.

Good reasons to disapprove of both!

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ImperialBlether · 31/05/2016 14:44

This is just about the oddest thing I've heard! Why doesn't she like you working? Where does she think you should get your money from? Where does she get hers from?

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sirfredfredgeorge · 31/05/2016 14:45

Are you the Queen?

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Wetbankhols · 31/05/2016 14:45

Oh, no its not forever living or anything like that - hate all that stuff.

It does sound odd written down, it is more because it's a minimum wage job and I think she feels it's beneath me. She is honestly lovely. I think it's because a few times I've not been able to make stuff because of work.

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bloodyteenagers · 31/05/2016 14:46

Am I the only one thinking its one of those annoying sell shite to your mates?
Part time hours? Check
Annoy your mates? Check

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myownprivateidaho · 31/05/2016 14:46

Oh right then sorry. Well yes that is completely out of line. If she's a good friend can you ask her to stop having a go?

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bloodyteenagers · 31/05/2016 14:46

Awesome cross post lol

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penisbeakerlaminateflooringetc · 31/05/2016 14:46

My first thought was forever living too! Grin

OP, you're gonna have to tell us what you do to prove us wrong!

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ImperialBlether · 31/05/2016 14:46

Apologies for double posting!

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penisbeakerlaminateflooringetc · 31/05/2016 14:47

Cross post, sorry Blush

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willconcern · 31/05/2016 14:48

you need to tell us what you do....

cook up crack cocaine
prostitution
selling drugs
glamour parties for 3 year old girls (particular MN hate)
supplying plastic party bag tat
forever living/amway/arbonne
homeopathy (some disapprove, although personally I don't)
writing essays for uni students

I can't think of much more, sadly disappointed in my imagination.......

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willconcern · 31/05/2016 14:50

oh cross posted.

She doesn't like you working because you do a minimum wage job? That's so much more boring than I thought it would be. That's unreasonable of her. Next time you see her, tell her you've found a far better paid job. As a high class hooker. Then see what she says.

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Wetbankhols · 31/05/2016 14:53

Yes, it is boring - sorry! Nothing like any of these. I think her main source of 'crossness' which is always jokily worded is that the hours are a tiny bit unsociable so for instance I couldn't go to a BBQ last Saturday because of work and she said in a very light tone 'Work again; I do not approve of this!'

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branofthemist · 31/05/2016 14:54

It depends does she think all minimum wage jobs are shitty and looks down on people who do them.

Or does she genuinely think you could get a better paid job?

If you are happy it doesn't matter if you could get a better job. Tell her you are happy and to stop going on about it.

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2nds · 31/05/2016 14:58

I get the feeling that she's just joking that you work too much. My mate works p/t in a subway outlet and I sometimes say similar stuff to her in jest. Are you sure you are not my friend?? Lol

BTW the forever folk do my head in, I have a friend who does forever and Momentis and the amount of times she's told me she has to pay £50 for this trial pack and £20 for that cream!

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Timeforabiscuit · 31/05/2016 15:04

Sorry for tarring you with a forever living brush op : )

She's being rude, but is she a type to take your feelings into account or a tell it how she sees it type?

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Beeboopaboo · 31/05/2016 15:08

Can you just ask her outright why she says things like that? i.e. next time she comments, just ask her why she said whatever she said. That gives you an opening to say you'd rather she didn't make these comments, you're happy with your work and it's not for anyone else to pass judgement.

Do you have any insight right now into why she might disapprove of what you do? For example, if your job involves going out to other people's homes, does she think you're putting yourself at risk?

Chances are she may just be jealous of the way you can fit work in with the rest of your life and have made a success of it, or perhaps feels that your life choices reflect negatively on hers. In which case, she probably won't be able to admit (possibly even to herself!) why she feels the way she does.

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