DH and I about to celebrate our 16th wedding anniversary. Only DH who is a musician said "yes" to a gig on our anniversary night, without checking it with me. Meanwhile my parents are coming to look after kids and I have booked an Airbnb for the weekend. Things haven't been great tbh and DH battling with serious depression. Has said he will cancel gig that he apparently said yes to when "there was not much else happening for me (i.e. him) work wise." But cancelling it for me isn't really the point - the fact that he booked a gig on our anniversary night feels massive especially as he has stormed out when I said how I felt about it. The last six months have been really tough - his behaviour v erratic with me and the kids. And that comes on the back of some very difficult issues with him not managing money/his tax affairs/ his career over the last 10 years to the point where we nearly lost the house on two occasions. I am a controlling b, apparently. I am certainly not perfect but I have had to hold things together during the various crises he has created. As a result I have really struggled with being supportive of him especially with this latest bout of depression. He massively holds this against me. I don't think booking a gig on our wedding anniversary was an act of malice in his part - more bad judgement. But it feels very symptomatic of the place we are in right now. We have 3 DCs. We have been to counselling sporadically but I feel I need one to one support to figure out how I feel about the marriage b4 going as a couple. I am wondering if he has some sort of personality disorder. He is getting some help with his depression although he has not been great at going to the counsellor sessions. Are we at the end of the road romantically?
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To think this isn't great news for our marriage?
24 replies
Maybemable · 30/05/2016 22:30
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