AIBU to think a janitor shouldn't swear at a year 7 pupil?

(74 Posts)
WhereTheFuckIsMyFuckingCoat Sat 28-May-16 11:36:03

Need to turn to mumsnet wisdom to sort out a dispute between DH and I.

DS in yr7, just turned 12, started high school in February (we are in Aus). Lost his locker key last week. I rang the office to ask what he needs to do and was informed that he had to go see 'Steve' the janitor, to borrow a spare, then when a new one was cut, he has to pay $10 for it. All good.

DS hunts for Steve, finds him at recess. DS is pretty shy and nervous, so politely approached Steve and said, "what do I do if I've lost my locker key?", to which Steve replies "Go and fucking look for it!" DS said he was open mouthed, but Steve then laughed and said "no, come in to the maintenance dept and I'll sort you out".

DS told me, incredulous that the janitor said that, but convinced that he had obviously been joking.

Now, personally, I think it's disgusting. I know my DS has said the odd swear word, because he's told me that a couple of times when he's been upset, he's blurted out some, but I really don't think he should be spoken to like that by a member of school staff.

DH, on the other hand says, for gods sake, he's the janitor, the boys will hear/use that language all the time, it's no big deal. He's really not bothered.

Was IBU to want to give the school a ring about it. It just seemed so wrong to me. I do swear, but almost never in front of the dcs, and if I do, only in moments of fright, for eg. I know they hear swearing, but don't think it's appropriate from a member of school staff, in effect, someone in a position of authority.

Please let me know if I'm overreacting and my DH is right?

Queenbean Sat 28-May-16 11:36:58

I think it's funny. But then I'm not a mother

Queenbean Sat 28-May-16 11:37:04

Ps, like your username!

newtscamander Sat 28-May-16 11:38:03

No it's not appropriate... but... Weirdo inappropriate janitors are a British tradition so I'm inclined to say get over it wink

Princecharlesfirstwife Sat 28-May-16 11:38:42

I agree with your DH.

APlaceOnTheCouch Sat 28-May-16 11:39:39

I wouldn't complain about that and I'm very strict on swearing He was obviously joking with your DS.

Arkhamasylum Sat 28-May-16 11:41:53

I'm not surprised that you were disgusted by the bad language, Wherethefuckismyfuckin.

TiggyD Sat 28-May-16 11:44:18

If you're in Australia you must expect some strange and foreign ways. The caretaker was joking #lighthearthed and offered to pull a spare out his pouch for you DS.

Chill.

Salmotrutta Sat 28-May-16 11:46:01

grin at Arkhamasylum!

Priceless.

memememe94 Sat 28-May-16 11:46:25

I would be annoyed, too. It's not the worst thing in the world, but it's setting an example of unprofessionalism at work.

BranTriLlygaid Sat 28-May-16 11:46:37

I'd not have an issue with it, obviously a joke. Cant keep kids away from people who use language/humour like this forever, secondary tends to be where they start seeing/learning different types of adult interaction in a social environment.

BoGrainger Sat 28-May-16 11:50:20

Thank goodness the male members of your family know when to be outraged and when to chill.

WhereTheFuckIsMyFuckingCoat Sat 28-May-16 11:51:42

I've already said I swear, not in front of the dcs as much as possible. My username is a funny line from my favourite film. I don't actually invite the dcs to view my mumsnet profile.

I'm not shocked at all by bad language, I'd say that's pretty obvious. I'm not shocked by porn either, but I wouldn't expect my dc to be shown it. hmm

PortiaCastis Sat 28-May-16 11:52:26

Wherethefuck why the fuck did he say fuckin.

The irony of your username is not lost

Witchend Sat 28-May-16 11:52:58

You need to alter your user name. Change coat to locker key.

MilkTwoSugarsThanks Sat 28-May-16 11:56:01

The janitor was just trying to have a laugh with a 12 yr old. Tried to make himself approachable at a 12 yr old's level. Would it have been better if he'd berated your DS but not sworn?

Chill the fuck out.

silverpenny Sat 28-May-16 11:59:04

Guy was just having a laugh - I'm sure your son hears the same or much worse from friends and other kids in school

StarryIllusion Sat 28-May-16 11:59:54

You realise he will hear worse in lessons?

ReginaBlitz Sat 28-May-16 12:03:17

It's funny. And Tbh you can't come on here harping on about swearing with a username like that.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost Sat 28-May-16 12:03:22

The OP swearing around her kids is one thing. Some one in kind of Authority swearing is at him is very much another.
Twist it round the other way. Ops son swears at the caretaker.
We don't know the tone he said it it. It could have sounded intimidating to the child.

PPie10 Sat 28-May-16 12:06:25

Yanbu, i don't think it's funny. If it's a teacher would people find it funny? He's still a caretaker at the school and should speak appropriately to the children.

WhereTheFuckIsMyFuckingCoat Sat 28-May-16 12:06:48

I've already said that I'm not shocked by swearing, but I don't think my username on mumsnet is relevant to how I want my DS spoken to. He doesn't know it, I don't show him it. If my username was IShagGoats, do you think that it would be appropriate for my dcs to be shown photos of bestiality??

byjimminey Sat 28-May-16 12:25:35

I though the F word was a fairly common occurrence in the land of Oz.

VeryBitchyRestingFace Sat 28-May-16 12:30:44

If my username was IShagGoats, do you think that it would be appropriate for my dcs to be shown photos of bestiality??

If your username was IShagGoats and you were complaining about your DC being shown porn featuring Billy Goat Gruff, I would think you were rather ...inconsistent.

Be the change and that all that. hmm

silverpenny Sat 28-May-16 12:35:59

IS this actually a reverse? Is your DP "steve" who is pissed off at having to open numerous lockers due to locked keys?

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