Long post, sorry but I am fuming.
SIL has a history for being manipulative, schemy and selfish and I guess what happened today was the final straw that made me snap.
Three days ago SIL calls DH and I to ask us if we wanted to have dinner with her and a childhood friend of hers (that DH hadn't met in 15 years) on Sat morning (today).
We said ok no probs, we'll come. Yesterday she texts us to check if we are ok with two other couples that are friends of the childhood friend joining the lunch.
We say: actually we do not quite feel like socializing with new people. (DH is going through a stressful period and just prefers to keep it quite during the weekend). Why don't you guys have lunch with these other people and we reschedule our lunch (SIL, childhood friend, DH and I) for another time?
SIL starts pushing and getting aggressive. She ignores the fact that we keep saying we don't quite feel like coming. She says she can't reschedule cause she is busy ANY other time, she says she has been organizing this lunch for months to make DH and this childhood friend meet after a long time, she says this friend is going to leave the country for 3 months and that we must see him today. Her actual words after we repeated several times "let's reschedule" were: let's just stick with tomorrow and deal with it.
We politely told her we'd rather not go 4 times. After that, she says that actually the other two couples cancelled so now it is back to us 4! No reason not to come then!
I asked her: ARE YOU SURE IT IS GOING TO BE JUST THE 4 OF US? She says yes.
We reluctantly agree to come. Today we show up and we find 8 people at the table and SIL looks at me and says: surprise!!!
I could have killed her with my bare hands.
For the whole lunch DH and I try to hide our frustration and be polite for the sake of these other people, but I actually went to the bathroom and cried a little out of frustration.
After we left, SIL calls DH and accuses us of having ruined the lunch cause apparently it was clear we did not want to be there and if we did not want to come we could have just let her know. She says she felt embarassed by our attitude. AAARRRRGGGGHHHH.
And by the way, it turns out that the childhood friend is not leaving the country for 3 months, he is going to Bristol for 5 days -.-'
AIBU to feel manipulated and tricked? AIBU to feel like I don't want to be bulldozed over if I say I don't want to join something?
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Please
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AIBU?
to think SIL manipulated us?
127 replies
Lilylo · 21/05/2016 18:37
OP posts:
Coconutty ·
21/05/2016 18:50
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Message withdrawn at poster's request.
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