Her daughter needs more love and affection than most?

(9 Posts)
AJ65 Sat 21-May-16 12:18:28

In an exchange of text messages another mother claimed that her daughter needs more love and affection than most. Our daughters are friends, but have rough patches and today was one of them.

My own daughter has been in floods of tears over the other girls words and actions and I don't think saying that the other girl's tough, brash, loud exterior masks a deeply sensitive child who needs more love and affection, thereby inferring that my child is being a bully by standing up to her, is reasonable.

Am I being unreasonable to think this is vaguely manipulative BS?

witsender Sat 21-May-16 12:23:40

It sounds like it. Yes, some kids do act up because they are in need of more love etc, but that is her job as a parent and not your daughter's problem.

whydidhesaythat Sat 21-May-16 12:25:34


whydidhesaythat Sat 21-May-16 12:26:55

Just asume there is no inference and let it pass

witsender Sat 21-May-16 12:35:21

Remember that she has only her daughter's side of whatever has happened, much like you.

Osolea Sat 21-May-16 13:08:02

I don't see how you've made the jump to thinking that it was inferred that your child is a bully, but then you've only given a tiny bit of the conversation. And as it was a conversation over text, it's going to be very difficult to get any real idea of what could have been being inferred tbh.

If it has to be discussed, then it sounds like you need to have a proper conversation, with both of you open to understanding the other child's POV.

If possible, let the school deal with it and each of you concentrate on your own child's behaviour.

Blimmincheek Sat 21-May-16 13:09:41

Barring bullying I've no idea why parents get involved in friendship issues. They sort it out themselves.

Girls spend their entire school days falling in and out of friends with their 'bffs' best thing to do is leave them to it.

Our dc may mot tell lies but their side of things always paints the other as the villain, parents like you and your dds friend perpetuate the problem.

AJ65 Sat 21-May-16 13:38:44

Thanks witsender; that's about it. Her child's exceptional feelings aren't my child's responsibility. its been very much a seesaw between the two of them and I'd rather they weren't friends because of all the drama. She has other friends that she can just get along with, but not this one...

AJ65 Sat 21-May-16 13:46:28

I know I only get my daughters side of things, but she is pretty honest and acknowledged that she had been mean before apologizing to the other girl.

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