missing my nephew.. AIBU?

(10 Posts)
beanie13 Wed 11-May-16 11:39:08

My sister and I haven't always gotten along, but since she had her DS I have been nothing but nice to her, and gone to see my lovely nephew whenever I can. I live around an hour away and I'm at university so I don't always get to see him!
Recently, my sister came to the city I live in to visit her SIL with the baby.. She didn't tell me she was in the city at all.
AIBU to be upset that she didn't tell me she was in town?

witsender Wed 11-May-16 11:41:01

It sounds a bit like you are only nice to her because you want to see your nephew...what is your relationship with her herself like? She may not have had time to see extra people when she was visiting.

WorraLiberty Wed 11-May-16 11:43:17

It depends on what reason she gave I suppose.

As an aside, I do know people who find it rather annoying when people they don't really get along with, suddenly change their behaviour towards them just because they've had a baby, but only you would know if that might be the case.

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe Wed 11-May-16 11:44:54

Yanbu to feel upset but she wasn't bu not to tell you.

She probably didn't have time to visit both of you.

thinkhappythoughts Wed 11-May-16 11:46:28

I have always tried to be nice to her, but usually she is not nice to me. Since she has had her DS I have ignored the nasty comments she directs at me and genuinely tried to be friends with her. The relationship isnt perfect, but I'm upset that she makes no effort to be kind to me when I am trying my hardest with her. sad

thinkhappythoughts Wed 11-May-16 11:48:40

She gave no reason at all, didn't even tell me she was in the city.. She met with the SIL for a cup of tea and that was all. I've said to her countless times that if she's in the city I'd love to see her.. but every time she is here she doesn't let me know.

WorraLiberty Wed 11-May-16 11:53:06

Name change fail?

Are you sure it's her you'd love to see when she's in the city?

Think about your thread title here. Do you think she might be feeling second best?

HighDataUsage Wed 11-May-16 11:54:36

I think your sister is trying to tell you something by not contacting you and you should listen to avoid further upset. Keep the door open to her but also move forward with your life and build relationships with people who genuinely care about you. Your family can also be people who are not blood related to you, it's all about the relationship that you have with them.

Good luck.

QuiteLikely5 Wed 11-May-16 11:56:46

What highdatausage said

There will be a reason and whatever it is doesn't put you in a good light from your sisters perspective

ceebie Wed 11-May-16 12:37:15

I wouldn't really want to do two visits in one day; I don't think that in itself is something to be upset about. Are you upset because she doesn't arrange to visit you (separately)?

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