Hi, I do not think I am being unreasonable but my partner thinks I am so I'd like some opinions of people who don't know us please.
Been together 6 years and have a small baby who was not planned but is very much loved by us both.
We both work full time during the week and here's the problem - he spends a lot of time away at weekends with hobbies and seeing family and friends - just says "this is what I'm doing this weekend" and off he goes whilst I am left here alone with my child from a previous relationship and our baby then on his return, which is whenever he chooses, is very happy to see baby and play with her and look after her but I feel very much like he hasn't missed me and only comes back at all for the baby.
He's been having so much fun on these busy weekends away that he falls asleep early the night he comes back and hardly ever wants sex, which I find upsetting.
I really miss him and would love to feel that he has missed me and wants sex with me.
Feel like he doesn't love me.
I've told him many times to no avail.
A couple of weekends ago i lost it when he just went off with a friend and forgot that we had plans. I was so looking forward to finally having a day together, it was a culmination of previous times I've been left to cope alone and when he did turn up I lost my temper, slammed a door and shouted at him that I wasn't putting up with it any more.
He thinks I am being unreasonable, he says doesn't like me when I'm unpleasant and angry and a controlling horrible person.
I stress him out - but his behaviour stresses me out!
I've found myself apologising though i don't think I'm in the wrong here because he was thinking of leaving me unless I basically become a different person, one who will just put up with his shoddy treatment of me without complaint. If I do that then all is well.
I'm so upset I ask is for a bit of consideration and love to be shown.
I don't expect him here all the time, don't mind him seeing friends and family at all.
i just want a simple life with a man who might well go away but comes back when he says he will, tells me he's missed me and makes me feel loved.
Staying awake for sex once in a while might help too.
He never tells me he loves me although when I ask he says he does.
I feel so unloved, I'm just a nuisance.
Feel like he doesn't love me, doesn't fancy me and doesn't consider my feelings.
He just cannot see it at all. Doesn't think there's anything wrong with him.
Who's unreasonable? Me for expecting to be a priority and feel loved or him for expecting to just come and go as he pleases without consulting me?
Was I justified in losing my temper and how do we move forward if we both think the other is at fault??
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AIBU?
Aibu to think I should not be the one who is apologising?
163 replies
Coulditbeme · 07/05/2016 18:29
OP posts:
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