to be annoyed at school teachers?

[smd5018]

I'll try to keep a long story short...my daughter(13) has come home on a few occasions over the past couple of weeks telling me that her new English supply teacher hates her. The teacher has mis-spelled a word on the whiteboard and my daughter corrected her (which I can understand would be miffing and embarrassing.) A couple of times when another child has asked for help with spelling the teacher has said something like "Oh why don't you ask her, since she's a walking dictionary" and called her to the front to write on the whiteboard. She now comes home and tells me all the words the techer has misspelled but doesn't mention it to the teacher, she is, however convinced that the teacher hates her. On Thursday the class was asked by the form teacher to write about how she feels about some of her lessons/subjects and was encouraged to include her thoughts on English. She said she wasn't enjoying it because the teacher didn't like her because she's corrected her on her spelling. Today she has been pulled to one side by the form teacher and called arrogant and told to worry about her own education, not the teacher's spelling. She's now saying she wants to miss school and doesn't want to go to her English classes, which she used to enjoy. The supply teacher is covering for maternity leave so will be around for a while. I'm not happy with either teacher, aibu, and is my child an arrogant little shit? Or is it fair enough to question a teacher?

[RobotMenu]

HOW does she speak to/ correct the teacher?

Are you talking about ALL teachers or just this one?

[FuzzyOwl]

Is there more to it than what you have put/your DD has told you? What sort of way is your DD correcting the teacher, because if she is sarcastic or rude about this then I can understand the teacher being annoyed. However, the teacher is supposed to be professional and should be used to dealing with children if they are arrogant, rude or annoying.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

I work with youth and when you ask for feedback be bloody prepared to accept it. Her form tutor asking for feedback then calling her arrogant? Disgusting!

[smd5018]

I've mentioned 2 teachers in my post, the supply teacher who can't spell and her form teacher who called her arrogant for pointing out mistakes.

[YouTheCat]

I know plenty of teachers who can't spell. However, I'd expect an English teacher to be able to spell or at least use a dictionary or auto-correct .

[MammaTJ]

I would be at the school on Monday morning and not leaving until this was sorted. It is bullying, nothing less by the English teacher, with the form teacher backing her.

My DD came home from school saying a teacher hated her. I made a point of speaking with that teacher at the parent teacher meeting. I told her my DD thought she hated her, she assured me she didn't. I pointed out that it was up to her to convince her, as the adult. She changed considerably after that.

In your case, go in with a list of examples and tell them YOU don't think she likes her. I think that is justified! Good luck and please update.

[WonkoTheSane42]

The teacher is embarrassed she made a mistake and is, pretty unprofessionally in my view, taking it out on your daughter. I'm an English teacher and when I make a mistake that the kids notice I usually turn it into a teaching moment about noticing and correcting your own errors. It's not on really to pick on a child to cover your own insecurities. Having said that, I have had kids in the past who perceived that I was picking on them when I wasn't doing anything of the sort - some kids are oversensitive. You know your daughter - do you think she is likely to be reading more into it than is there? Regardless, a quick call or note to the school along the lines of "My daughter thinks her new English teacher doesn't like her and it's making her worried about coming to class. Could the teacher reassure her?" would probably clear it up. If the teacher is picking on her, it should be a reminder for her to have a word with herself, and if she isn't then she'll just reassure your daughter and that'll be that.

[Alexa444]

I think it depends on the tone of the correction. If she is being a bit up herself and snotty about it then the teacher may have a point. If it is a simple "You spelt xxx wrong, miss" then I can't see what's wrong with that. We corrected our teacher's spelling often and sometimes our English teacher would do it deliberately and offer prizes for those who picked up every spelling error in the lesson. How can an English teacher in secondary school not be able to spell better than a 13 year old anyway? How do we expect teenagers to leave school literate when their teachers cannot spell at a year 9 level? Mistakes happen but come on. Our teachers always used to be pleased because it meant we were paying attention.

[sonlypuppyfat]

Teachers really wind me up, the special ones. My DD is getting ATLs of 1 and 2 in all her lessons where she gets 4 she acts exactly the same in his lesson as she does the others. But he obviously doesn't like her. Also he cuts his toenails in class and also plays Slipknot! What a professional!!

[phoolani]

No idea what you should do but my dd's normal teacher drives her crazy with spelling and grammar mistakes. Dd is a complete teacher pleaser who would never correct her; she just seethes silently. I keep telling her it's ok to - politely - speak up, but judging by your post, maybe it isn't 😟. It certainly should be, tho. I want my dd to treat her teachers with respect but not blind obedience.

[crazywriter]

Is there more to this your DD isn't telling you? Did she act arrogant when she corrected this teacher?

I'd get a meeting with form teacher and the English teacher. A friend of mine had to do that when her sons incorrect spellings were corrected with more incorrect spellings. She (rightfully) expected more from an English teacher, as I would.

If it makes you feel any better (and this might out me) my English teacher once set home workto write an essay on "why it's good to kill people"....

[Alexa444]

Actually, while I have my judgypants well and truly hoiked, what kind of teacher ridicules a child for being able to spell? Isn't that kind of what they are there to achieve? I would tell the form tutor that she IS worrying about her own education and so are you. Worried that your 13 year old child can spell better than the person who is supposed to be educating her.

[WonkoTheSane42]

Your solution seems like an overly aggressive move for the first salvo, MammaTJ. Are you the parent whose first words to me at a parents' evening were "What's your problem with my son?" (Where to start!) All because I had given him a few punishment exercises for his pretty vile behaviour.

[HighwayDragon1]

Some kids take great delight in pointing out your mistakes, yes even teachers make mistakes! I can't see why the teacher would dislike her for it,unless she was exceptionallyrude and gloating about it. I'm think maybe she got the wrong end of the stick from her tutor and (s)he was saying that your dd may be seen as arrogant for pointing out mistakes.

My teens get a merit if they find a mistake in my writing

[WonkoTheSane42]

Teachers really wind me up

Delightful! I think I'll make an exit from this thread....

[smd5018]

Obviously she hasn't come home and told me she's been rude and I can't say 100% that she hasn't seeing as I wasn't there but she is usually respectful. I've never been told by anyone ever that she's rude. Every single teacher I saw at the last parent's evening gave glowing reports and said she was a joy to teach (I'm not exaggerating, I was blushing!) The English teacher hasn't called her out for being rude, and the form teacher has called her arrogant based on what she wrote at his request. He may have brought it up with English teacher first, but if she did feel that my daughter was rude and wanted the form teacher to deal with it surely she should have brought it up at the time (around a fortnight ago) Even if she were rude is it right for a teacher to respond to that by making jibes at her in class and making her feel uncomfortable?

[howtorebuild]

My children didn't react whilst in their head gave teachers like that, the finger. There is always someone horrible you have to spend time with, a good lesson is how to not let the vile creatures know they get to you.

[Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost]

No your child is not a little shit. I mean I can understand a teenager getting in a strop about being called out on spelling a word wrong, but not a fuckin dinosaur.
I'd go as far as to say it edges towards bullying.
If your DD is saying she doesn't want to go to school, because of teacher. That is a bad day, and needs investigation.
Please book an appointment with the HT.

[Cabrinha]

I'd want to see what your daughter wrote.

I was - to my shame now - an uppity rude little precocious madam at that age, arrogantly correcting mistakes.
I once wrote something scathing in a detention piece about my teacher (don't even know what now!) and when he said "that is slanderous you know" I actually piped up with "actually sir it isn't, because it's written not spoken it would be libellous, and also I think it's true and if I'm right that it's true, then it can't be libel or slander".

To his credit (great man!) he saw through my early teenage posturing, maybe he guessed all the shit at home that was making me act all clever and hard for attention and laughed at me nicely before talking to me seriously - and not punishing me further.

I had my reasons but by god I could be an arrogant know it all little shit.

It sounds like the first teacher handled things badly but I'd be very keen to see what your daughter actually wrote.

[Cabrinha]

Oh and I had the glowing school reports too.

[apple1992]

I'd take a second to consider that what your DD has told you isn't necessarily what has happened. By all means speak to the school, but I wouldn't go all guns blazing.

If what your DD has said is the full story, then the supply teacher sounds unprofessional however, could it be the class/your DD are taking advantage of a supply and being rude/arrogant/disrespectful, she's been pulled up and is now giving you a story before school phones home? This may not be the case at all! But I would consider it before challenging the school.

[lbsjob87]

I think it depends. You know your daughter and could probably guess at whether she said: "Excuse me, miss, I think you made a mistake", or if she was egged on by friends to ridicule the teacher because of it.
Supply teaching is HARD - maybe this teacher has had to toughen up because of bad experiences in other schools.
As others have said, the only real solution is to make an appointment to see both teachers and possibly the head with your daughter present and get to the bottom of it.

[apple1992]

And I only say the above as have seen lovely kids be really defiant and disrespectful to staff (particularly young/supply) then tell their parents a totally different story.

I'd phone school and say there's an issue - they should very least have a restorative conversation with her and teacher to resolve the issues so they don't continue, whoever is at fault.