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AIBU?

To think my 4yo has a bad attitude problem

10 replies

Moomoomango · 22/04/2016 19:40

My 4 year old can have such a horrible attitude and at times can be a real sweet heart. Tonight whilst reading his bedtimes stories his dad yawned so my son spat at him and said "I don't like yawning in my room" and then when dad asked him to clean his teeth he spat at him again.. At which point oh clearly pissed off had words and walked away and put him to bed. Is this normal behaviour for a 4 year old? He can be very rude and I just don't know how to change it? I'm starting to think he has behavioural issues..

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TheSparrowhawk · 22/04/2016 19:43

He doesn't have a 'bad attitude' (what does that even mean??). He's 4. If one of my children spat at my DH they'd be straight on the step and then asked to apologise. If they did it a second time there'd be more serious consequences such a losing access to a favourite toy for a period of time.

Every single child in the world acts up. The thing is how you respond to it.

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HighwayDragon1 · 22/04/2016 19:48

What happened the first time he spat?

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Moomoomango · 22/04/2016 19:52

He got told off as far as I know, I was settling ds 2 at the time x

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Birdsgottafly · 22/04/2016 19:59

What do you do when he does something completely unxceptable, or is this the first bout of challenging boundaries?

All children challenge boundaries. It's important for you and your DP to know what you each consider unacceptable and what strategies you are going to use. Then it's about being consistent.

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Excited101 · 22/04/2016 20:10

I come down incredibly hard on spitting. There are no warnings given.

Be clear, firm and consistent. Behaviour and attitude like that would not be tolerated under my watch, it's up to you both to decide what is and isn't acceptable.

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Believeitornot · 22/04/2016 20:14

He's 4. Why are you writing him off as having bad attitude when it is your job as a parent to teach him how to behave? He's 4!??!

Your dh needs to grow up and demonstrate how to behave.....

I've noticed that when my DCs are rude they sound very much like me when I get cross with them. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree..... So I'd suggest you and dh take a look in the mirror!

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katemiddletonsnudeheels · 22/04/2016 20:16

Gosh that is pretty revolting; I'd be shocked!

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Wolfiefan · 22/04/2016 20:16

Had words and walked away?
Bad behaviour should result in a clear and preferably immediate consequence. You need to teach your child some boundaries rather than blame "attitude" Confused

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YouTheCat · 22/04/2016 20:20

The bedtime story would have stopped very abruptly with the first spitting incident.

Teeth brushed and straight to bed.

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Vaara · 22/04/2016 20:21

Four years olds can be twats. They wind you up just for the fun of it.

If he's playing up because he's tired, natural consequence is simply straight to bed.

I wouldn't take it personally. If he was told it's wrong, fine. Just get him unconscious and open the wine asap.

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